How to influence toddlers (and grown ups)

How to influence toddlers (and grown ups)

When my oldest teen was a toddler, she used to love playing in the sandpit in our local park.

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She’d make sandcastle after sandcastle, before stamping them to the ground with her chubby little feet.

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She loved that sandpit so much she never wanted to leave. ?

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There would be tears and tantrums every time, as we tried to persuade and cajole her to get back in the buggy:

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‘Come on now sweetheart, it’s time to go – it’s lunchtime. ?We’ve been here for an hour already so we have to leave.’

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Nothing seemed to make a difference.

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When I went back to work, our nanny, Marta, took her to the park instead. ?

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When we asked Marta how it had been leaving the sand pit, she said ‘Oh, she was fine.’

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How on earth did Marta do it? we wondered.

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‘Well, I just asked her if she wanted to stay in the sandpit or come and see the fluffy doggies in the other part of the park. ?She chose the dogs.’

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I realised two important things in that moment:

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  1. I knew absolutely nothing about parenting
  2. Options are wonderfully persuasive

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As sales and communication expert, Andy Bounds, writes:

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“‘If you say to someone ‘Would you like X or not?’, they can reply ‘Not.’

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But when you offer options We have two good options here – X or Y. ?Which do you prefer?’”

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…you have a much greater chance of success. ?

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That’s because we all love the illusion of choice – it makes us feel in control, whether we’re three years old or 30 years old.

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So, how could YOU use the power of options to win people over?

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Maybe you’ll ask participants to choose which topics you cover first in your training or presentation?

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Or perhaps you’ll give a senior stakeholder two recommended paths to choose from?

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Let me know what you try – I’d love to know.


I'm a marketing and brand consultant and communication coach. To get your business off that comfy old couch and out there winning business, visit kimarnold.co.uk or drop me a line at [email protected].

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