How To Ignore Negative Comments Online

Since my YouTube channel took off last year I've received regular messages from people who are thinking about starting their own creative project, whether it's a channel of their own, a podcast, a blog or some other endeavour. A lot of them ask me if I'll be a guest once they're up and running, and if I can do it online and they seem nice, I generally say yes.

I don't hear from 95% of them ever again.

Some might decide to do something different, or find a better YouTuber to appear on their podcast, but I think a lot of people don't pursue their projects because they're afraid of what people will think or say. They're paralysed because they worry what their friends, family or colleagues may think of them if they put their head above the parapet and put something out into the world.

Some worry more about anonymous trolling from people they've never met. From people who don't put themselves in profile pictures, who hide behind fake names and abuse people for making things they would never dare do.

I used to worry about these things. I used to worry that if I published something or created something that my friends would judge me, or that people online would attack me. But I've learnt to change my mindset so that I ignore qualitative feedback, and have become much more prolific in what I create as a result.

You can choose not to be affected by other people's comments

Last week I published a video to my YouTube channel called How To Not Worry About What Other People Think. The video is split into two parts, firstly myself explaining the tactics I use to ignore other people's opinions and comments, and secondly a few prominent creators I know (Jaackmaate, Lloyd Griffith, Saunders CB, Creative Calm ASMR, Tubes and Blue Van Man) talking about how they ignore negativity.

It's been popular with a lot of people telling me how much it's helped them get over creative blocks so I thought it might be useful to the LinkedIn crowd.

Another person's opinions are irrelevant

My view on this is simple. Other people's opinions and views are nothing to do with me.

You might not like Brussels sprouts. That's an issue for you, not me.

You're the one who will miss out on them at Christmas. You're the one who doesn't get the joy of pan fried sprouts with bacon and chestnuts.

I'm not going to stop eating sprouts just because you don't like them. It doesn't mean Brussels sprouts are objectively bad. It's just your opinion. It doesn't affect me.

So if we agree that what you think of sprouts is of no consequence to me, why should what you think of my videos matter? It's just your opinion, and doesn't affect me in the slightest.

I'm not saying you should ignore all feedback. If lots of people are telling you that the sound quality could be improved, by all means listen back and buy a new microphone if you agree. I'm just saying the decision of whether something is good or not is for you to make.

Create something, decide if it's good, then move on

This is my process for putting something out into the world.

Firstly I'll come up with the idea, decide on the format, write and create the content. Then I'll decide if I'm happy with how it has turned out and whether I want to put it out.

Once it's been published, the discussion of whether it's good or not is finished. Done. It's my opinion that matters as it's my content, so if someone decides to tell me their views on it I'll just smile politely, thank them for their input, and completely ignore them.

Opinions are subjective

I run Dry Lunch Productions, a video production company that creates content for big brands including PUMA, EA Sports and Carling. Sometimes a client will request a change to a video that I disagree with. I'll always explain why the video has been edited in the way it has, but ultimately they're paying, so they get to choose how the final video looks. Their opinion isn't right or wrong, just as mine isn't. They're just different views and different executions.

Opinions are subjective and ultimately there will always be people who disagree with what you do.

If people criticise you online, respond with kindness

People who hide behind anonymous user names and abuse people on the internet are not happy. I don't know what has gone on in their lives up to this point, but I know they act in this way to make themselves feel better about their own situations.

If someone is abusive, racist, homophobic, etc. I will always ignore them and block them. But if someone is just trying to write something unkind, it's because they're unhappy, and so I try and respond with compassion and humour. Their opinion doesn't affect me, so I'll do the virtual equivalent of smiling politely and walking away.

The best example of this is that I've experienced was on Twitter where someone went from abusing me to starting to follow me in the space of ten tweet exchanges.

Some people just want a reaction and lack the social skills to get one without being rude, as YouTuber Tom Stockdale highlighted this week.

Responding with kindness can often convert a critic to a fan.

When you stop worrying about others you become free to create

One morning last week the comedian Lloyd Griffith texted me and suggested we do a temporary daily podcast during Coronavirus lockdown. The first episode of what is now called Cooped Up was recorded at 5pm that day. I made some podcast art while supervising my kids' bathtime and Lloyd edited and uploaded it. The episode was online by 7pm that evening, a few hours after we'd first discussed it.

Once you've decided to block out negative views it frees you up to make things quickly and without fear.

And the more things you do, the more opportunities open up to you.

Do worries about negative comments stop you from creating content? What techniques do you use to ignore negativity? Let me know in the discussion below.

Dry Lunch Productions produce video content for brands of all sizes and I consult with smaller businesses on how to create online content that builds brands and drives sales. Please get in touch if you'd like to chat about how we can work together by emailing [email protected]