How to Hit the "Reset Button" Mid-Argument with Children

April 10, 2024

Welcome to the first edition of my weekly newsletter. I created a shorter version of my monthly newsletter to share trauma-informed content with you more often and in smaller bites. Let me know what you think of this edition in the comments.

Topic of the Week - How to Hit the "Reset Button" Mid-Argument

Sometimes, I find myself in the middle of an argument with my child, and I realize I am headed down the wrong path, but I feel like I’m in too deep to turn it around.

That is not true. We can always stop and reset the conversation once we realize the argument is less important than our relationship with our child.

One of the ways that the cycle of trauma repeats itself is through moments of verbal and emotional abuse from parent to child. If you feel yourself losing control of your temper, knowing you can always turn back and hit the "reset button" is important.

I’ve been practicing the following phrases with my family, and it's turned around some serious meltdowns with my child.

As part of my contribution to Child Abuse Prevention Month (April), I created this graphic with examples of what to say when things get heated.

When we model this behavior for our children, they learn they can interrupt challenging behavior and start over when they feel they are losing control of their words or emotions. This is a valuable skill to have as both a child and an adult.

When we engage in opportunities to change our automatic reactions to our children, we can prevent the cycle of trauma from repeating.

Upcoming Webinar

Helping Young Children Cope with Supervised Visitation

REGISTER HERE

This one-hour webinar will teach you my 10-step model for trauma-informed supervised visitation and much more! Spots are filling up, so don't miss out! A recording will be sent to those who register.

10-Step Model for Trauma-Informed Supervised Visitation

Step 1: Mentally Prepare the Child

Step 2: Create a Comfortable Setting

Step 3: Use Simple Language

Step 4: Emphasize Safety

Step 5: Explain Why

Step 6: Answer Questions

Step 7: Be Honest

Step 8: Collaborate with all parties

Step 9: Use Positive Language

Step 10: Encourage Emotional Expression

REGISTER HERE

Save the Date

On April 26th at noon EDT, I will co-host a webinar with HEAL PA on child abuse prevention strategies in 2024, including cyber abuse and the signs to look for. Stay tuned to my LinkedIn page for the registration link.

New Book Coming Soon!

My friend and colleague, Lori Desautels , author of Intentional Neuroplasticity and Connections Over Compliance, is publishing a new book for educators and those who work with children.

Body and Brain Brilliance will be out this summer, so follow Lori on social media and LinkedIn for the release date.

I've had the honor of reviewing early chapters, and it is packed full of activities to soothe our nervous systems and co-regulate with children. Add Body and Brain Brilliance to your summer reading list to prepare for back-to-school!

Quote of the Week

“The parent or caregiver becomes dysregulated when they are scared by evidence that the child is manifesting emotions or behaviors that will make their future difficult: that they might become a child murderer, an arsonist, a depressive, a neurotic, a scaredy-cat or a delinquent.”

— The Good Enough Parent: How to raise contented, interesting, and resilient children by The School of Life

News from BTTC

• A new BethTyson.com is coming soon! I will release my new website design, which includes updated branding, in the next couple of weeks. I can't wait for you to see it. You will find my new site much more user-friendly and pleasing to the eye.
• My next children's book, Sullivan Goes to See Mama: Helping Children Cope with Supervised Visitation, is approaching completion. We are past the storyboard stage and are working on color illustrations. This book was a resource I desperately needed while providing therapy to children in foster and kinship care. Stay tuned to this newsletter for upcoming book launch events.

*If you would like to schedule a reading of this book and trauma-informed visitation training for your staff or organization, contact me at [email protected] for pricing.

Here's the storyboard version (pre-color) of the first page of Sullivan Goes to See Mama:

The final monthly edition of my Childhood Trauma Newsletter came out two weeks ago. If you missed it, you can read it HERE .

Inside, you will find:

1. An in-depth look at the state of children's mental health in 2024 based on research from the National Institute of Health. I also include my suggestions on what we can do to turn this ship around and get a handle on the children's mental health crisis.

2. My recent podcast episode with Ingrid Cockhren, CEO of PACEsConnection. PACEs stands for Positive and Adverse Childhood Experiences.

3. The?registration link ?to my next webinar: Helping Young Children Cope Before, During, and After Supervised Visitation. This live event is on Tuesday, May 14th at 6:30 PM EST.

3. Resource of the Month: A super adorable and funny video on "attunement" between father and toddler, and an activity to go with it.

4. Trauma Champion of the Month: Dr. Ardeshir Mehran, and his anti-pathology approach to depression.

Thank you for being a loyal member of my LinkedIn community. Please comment below and share my post so more people can learn about childhood trauma and how to prevent it. You can sign up to receive this newsletter in your inbox at BethTyson.com.

Beth Tyson Trauma Consulting, LLC provides workshops and webinars on healing and preventing childhood trauma, and various topics related to kinship care. Please contact me at BethTyson.com/contact or send me a DM to schedule an exploratory call.

With hope, grief, and love,

Beth