How to have ‘Curiosity Conversations’

You would have read about the need and importance of developing the capacity for curiosity in ‘step one’ on this pathway.

Here is something you can do to help nurture and develop your curiosity, it is a wonderful idea gleaned from Brian Grazer’s book, A Curious Mind: The Secret to a Bigger Life. Grazer is a Hollywood producer who has been insatiably curious his entire life and has perfected the art of hosting curiosity conversations as a means of learning.

So, here is how you can go about having curiosity conversations:

1. Draw up an initial list of people from whom you have something specific you want to learn. This could be people within and outside of your field/industry; it could be people known and unknown - you might for example simply write ‘Airline pilot’. List what it is you hope to learn – or a specific question you wish to ask them, for example: Airline pilot – how do you prepare and stay alert for ‘the worse case scenario' when for much of your time it never occurs?
2. Contact them requesting 40 minutes of their time for a specific conversation and state your intent. In this aspect, you will find ways of approaching them that make it difficult for them to say “no”. Grazer talks about hounding some people for over a year before finally getting time with them. This part of the process - ‘the chase’ can be exciting and will certainly yield some valuable lessons of its own.
3. Be on time and respect the time requested. Don’t take notes during the conversations (or try not to) as this might in some cases make it feel more like an ‘interview’. The aim is to have a conversation with a specific ‘launch pad’ by way of a question but then let it flow from there.
4. Don’t talk about yourself. This is about learning as much about the other person (and the specific topic) as you can.
5. Don’t be afraid to ‘dig deeper’ – ask ‘why’ questions and listen actively.
6. Immediately after the appointment, make time to go and capture the conversations in writing while it is still fresh in your memory.
7. Reflect on how the individual came across – were they dismissive or distracted? Were they equally curious about what you were doing or why you were there? As much can be learnt by what wasn’t said and how you were received as by what was said.
8. Collect great questions to ask and be thinking about a diverse range of people from whom there is something to be learnt. This really is ‘everybody’ and certainly isn’t only the rich, famous or powerful. A conversation with a homeless person, an elderly person, someone in hospice, a five-year old can all yield amazing insights and enrich your learning.
9. Keep a dedicated record / journal of your conversations.
10. Challenge someone else to match your endeavour and every now and then get together to compare notes, learn from each other’s approach and experience and help create accountability.