How to Handle Rude Comments Like a Pro ??

Welcome to Quick Confidence! This weekly letter delivers a spritz of stories, tips and actions that will build your confidence and power. Each tip bolsters confidence in your body, mind, and relationships so you can lead yourself and others to greatness. Quick Confidence is also a book! Get your copy to carry confidence wherever you go.

Ah... the joys of climbing??the corporate ladder.

Picture this: I was in my twenties, feeling absolutely pumped after being promoted to Senior Project Manager. I had really made an effort to be more vocal and proactive, so this promotion felt especially hard-earned. I was basking in some kind comments from colleagues when—boom—a guy from another department casually dropped, “I guess they’re handing those out to everyone now!”

Ouch. Thanks for that uplifting comment, right?

In that moment, I froze. I felt my shoulders sink and I stayed silent. That little jab stuck with me like gum on a hot sidewalk. I found myself replaying his words over and over, like a broken record, which—surprise, surprise—only made me feel worse. And it’s not just me; research shows that ruminating on negative comments can raise stress levels, zap confidence, and even increase blood pressure.

So, what’s the antidote? Standing up for ourselves! Of course, it may not fully fix the situation or make the offender “see the light,” but it’s a powerful way to reclaim your confidence and remind the world (and yourself) of your worth.

Whether it’s a backhanded compliment or a dismissive comment, we all encounter rude remarks at work. And when we’re not equipped to respond, those small digs can easily knock us off our game. So, the next time someone tries to rain on your parade, try one of these strategies for handling the situation with confidence and grace:

Quick Confidence Tips to Handle Rude Comments with Class:

1. Embodied: Show your limits. When someone lobs a rude comment your way, they’re typically fishing for a reaction. But you don’t have to take the bait. Instead of snapping back reactively, let your body language do the talking. Keep your composure, maintain eye contact, and give a neutral look that says: I’m not here for this. Standing tall with a calm expression sends a powerful signal—you won’t engage in their drama, but you aren’t intimidated by it either. If I had squared up and raised my eyebrows at that snide remark, it would’ve communicated: Really? Is that what we’re doing?! This minimal response lets them know they haven’t rattled you. Your non-reactive stance becomes your silent shield, setting clear boundaries and reinforcing your strength.
2. Mindset: It’s not about you. Most rude comments come from someone else’s insecurities. When you hear a cutting remark, mentally remind yourself: This isn’t about me; it’s about them. Depersonalizing their words strips away their power and keeps you from carrying the weight of their negativity. One of my favorite strategies? Picture a mental buffer between you and the person—a clear bubble surrounding them where their words bounce off it without reaching you. This mindset shift allows you to stay focused on what really matters: your own growth and success. So channel your inner Yoda and remember: “Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, and rude comments lead to... well, not my problem!”
3. Interpersonal: Call it out, but keep it classy. You don’t have to sink to their level to make your point. A calm, confident response like, “That wasn’t very kind,” or “I worked hard for this role, actually,” goes a long way. Or, try asking for clarification as in, “I don’t get it, what do you mean?” This not only calls attention to their rude comment but also forces them to rethink what they just said. By calmly addressing the situation, you establish your boundaries and avoid silently stewing over the insult. This approach allows you to take your power back without escalating the situation.

Resilience is built one moment and one situation at a time, so continue practicing these skills. Every time you stand up for yourself, you reinforce your self-worth, setting the standard for how others should treat you.?

And don’t forget to celebrate these moments of assertiveness—they're powerful steps on your confidence journey!

How do you typically respond when someone throws a rude comment your way? Share your strategies or experiences in the comments below—I’d love to hear what works for you!

In this snackable Nano Tips for Communicating with Confidence course, I share how to ensure your voice is fully heard in any situation. You’ll discover words that elevate your presence and three practical shifts to become more assertive. Plus, you'll learn strategies for handling over-talkers, disagreements, overthinking, overexplaining, workplace conflict, and even being overworked! As a LinkedIn Learning author, I may be compensated if you make a purchase.