How To Handle Psychological Warfare At Work

Certain people you work with want to surpass you. Others want to hold you back to keep you from surpassing them. 

Very often, these people use the power of suggestion and other psychological strategies to throw you off balance. Once you’re off balance, they will seize the opportunity to outmaneuver you.

They will close in on the promotion you want. They will promise support that never comes. The only way to protect yourself against these psychological strategies is to develop strategies of your own.

You must learn to master how to use the power of suggestion and psychological warfare techniques, or be consumed by those who have mastered them.

How Suggestion Influences Your Behavior

Suggestions affect your expectations and expectations affect your behavior. These suggestions can be deliberate or non-deliberate.

A report by Current Directions in Psychological Science shows that suggestions create response expectancies, or the ways in which we anticipate our responses in various situations.

These expectancies set you up for automatic responses that actively influence how you get to the outcome you expect in any situation. Once you anticipate a specific outcome will occur, your subsequent thoughts and behaviors will help make that outcome happen.

For example, if a normally timid man expects that wearing a well-tailored power suit to a networking event will help him meet more business prospects, he will feel more confident after he puts on the suit, be more outgoing and make more meaningful connections at the event.

Though he may give credit to the suit, his expectations of how the suit would make him feel played a big role. A deliberate suggestion influenced his expectations, which influenced his behavior.

But this man could have been influenced by non-deliberate suggestions as well. If this man’s colleague told him that he had a good feeling about the event they were attending, he might believe something lucky would happen and subconsciously act more confidently.

Studies reported in Psychological Science confirm that these kinds of non-deliberate suggestions can make people more successful.

 For example, golfers make more successful putts when they are told that a golf ball is lucky, participants solve motor-dexterity puzzles better when experimenters make a “good luck” hand gesture, and patients perform better on memory games when they’re in the presence of their lucky charm.

Subtle suggestions from your surroundings affect you. These suggestions can change your behavior in a positive way. But, if you’re not careful, the power of suggestion can also change your behavior in a negative way. Here are 3 strategies that will guard you against the power of suggestion and psychological warfare:

1. Consolidate your forces.

Everyone is distracted. Most people have 10 or 20 things they are trying to juggle at the same time. This is why the most common response you’ll hear when you ask a colleague how things are going is, “Busy!”

Busy people can’t get anything significant done. These people are not a threat. They are like tiny hammers trying to hit 100 different nails at once. They tap, tap, tap without ever making a solid blow. But, at the same time, these people are incredibly distracting. They will tap, tap, tap you on your shoulder or in your ear until you are completely distracted too.

They will try to drag you into their office drama and, once you're dragged in, any progress you’ve been making towards your career goals will stop. Instead of moving forward, you'll start spending all of your time trying to explain yourself or trying to show other people that they’re wrong.

The people who are constantly trying to get your attention are baiting you. They want to distract you. They know that when you are distracted, you are not a threat. They know that when you’re spread thin, you are weak. If you find yourself getting split into a thousand different directions, the best strategy is to consolidate your forces. 

Go back to your core priorities and start putting first things first again. Channel all of your energy into doing just one thing until it’s done. If you focus yourself entirely on a single purpose, you will complete it. In the meantime, everything else, including the distracting people tap, tap, tapping you, will go away.

Consolidating your forces is also the best way to confront manipulative colleagues. Remember, these manipulators are naturally distracted. They’re busy diving headfirst into office drama and annoying other people with their woes and complaints. By channeling all of your energies against them, you can defeat them quickly and permanently.

2. Change the conversation. 

Office drama needs energy to survive. When somebody at work makes a negative suggestion or paints you in a poor light, the worst thing you can do is try to explain yourself or show the other person they're wrong. Defending yourself in this way only extends the conversation they started. A better strategy is to change the course of the conversation.

For example, if someone is pointing out one of your supposed flaws, don’t fire back a defensive comment about how you don’t have any flaws or about how the other person also has flaws. Instead, ask the other person how they overcame one of their own flaws. Or, ask them how things are going on their project or how close they are to meeting a big deadline.

Refocus them on something insignificant or on a pressing issue in their own work. Or, put them in the driver’s seat by asking them for advice (it's up to you whether or not you follow their advice). 

In a similar way, you can make your weaknesses irrelevant by focusing entirely on your strengths. If you channel your energies into what you do well, your resulting successes will be so overwhelming that they'll overshadow your shortcomings. Now, when one of your supposed weakness is mentioned, you can quickly and easily redirect the conversation towards one of your giant victories.

3. Starve your problems. 

When someone challenges you at work, your first reaction will be to challenge them in return. You’ll want to stand up for yourself and fight them with logic. You’ll want to seek justice by holding a mirror up to them and showing them why they’re wrong. This is a complete waste of time.

No one thinks they’re wrong ever. No one plays a villain in their own lives. By immediately retaliating against someone, you add energy to the situation and strengthen their resolve against you. You also expose your position. A better strategy is to sit on your hands and let things marinate. Don’t show any signs of weakness or distress.

Instead, slowly phase yourself out of the situation. Then, wait to see how the other person responds. Starve the negative situations until it's replaced by something more positive. Create a void and see what fills it. Stepping away will give you perspective and clarity over how to best use this situation to your advantage.

Remember, people who love office drama need you and your aspirations to channel their frustrations and failures onto. They need you to keep tabs on. They need you as a target. Your engagement gives them energy and direction. But, when you disappear, you force these people to carry the full weight of their own troubles. You force them to waste their time attacking empty space instead of you.

Always be aware of how other people’s emotions and actions are affecting you. Do not fall victim to the power of suggestion or any other psychological warfare strategies. Guard your mind by consolidating your forces toward your career goals and by changing the conversation when things get off course. By starving your problems you will keep other people from getting in your head and continue moving forward towards career success.

What strategies do you use to protect yourself against psychological warfare at work? Tell me in a comment below.

I also write for Fast Company and Entrepreneur Magazine:

• The Skills You Need To Grow Your Business
• 10 People Who Will Destroy Your Business
• 5 Benefits Of Being A Misfit Entrepreneur

Check out my book of personal and professional advice, Black Hole Focus: How Intelligent People Create A Powerful Purpose For Their Lives.