How to Give Feedback that Seed Growth

Most feedback fall on deaf ears, yet people persist in giving it anyway. Many people do it because they do not have a proper moment or channel to give it. So they end up bursting, in which case the giver of the feedback feels good but still it has not solved the problem as the receiver most likely would have chosen to shut out the feedback.

So much feedback fall on deaf ears that we now have a crisis of 'shut-ears' in many organizations resulting in deadlocks, destructive office politics which poisons the environment for any prospect of creativity. In our 12-year study of why so few Asian companies profit from innovation, we found that many don't have a culture or practice on how to give feedback that will seed growth and innovation.

If you seek to be a better giver of feedback, here are six practical steps that we have applied which has transformed relationships and changed the working environment. We call this the Gardener's Approach, and it has worked wonders.

1) Prepare the ground

If your trust level with the colleague or subordinate is low, then most likely your feedback will not be well-received. If you actually want the person to improve, then you will also care enough to take note of the good that the individual does. Be specific when the person has done something well and affirm him/her before giving any feedback.

In Asia, many people are good at criticizing but are poor at giving useful affirmation. Obviously, do not give generic forms of affirmation like, you are such a nice person. People will sense that you insincere and it will backfire. The key is to be observant and be specific when the person indeed has done something well. This then sends a signal to the individual that you care for his/her success.

2) Pick the right moment

If you are good at giving feedback, then go ahead to catch up with your colleague and share feedback over a nice cup of coffee or tea. If he/she is your subordinate, then be upfront about it. Propose that you like to provide feedback for his/her sake from time to time.

However, if you feel awkward about proposing having coffee to give feedback, then it will be best to align with HR plans and deliver it during annual reviews.

Many feedback tools that companies use today do not encourage mutual trust and interaction. So we have introduced a mutual feedback tool called Bonsai where superiors and subordinates can share feedback about each other's work and impact in a positive setting. It makes a huge difference when feedback is given with care and concern.

3) Examine yourself

If you are frustrated and you like to deliver feedback randomly, it will not work. Before giving the comments, take a moment to reflect on the intent and what is the benefit of the feedback. Too many feedback are provided with little consideration, and they do not seed any growth.

We often ask leaders to write the feedback that they have about their fellow leaders and ask them to examine their intent. It is interesting to note that when trust level is low, people tend hide behind generic terms and words. However, when trust level is high, the feedback tends to be specific and meaningful.

So take a moment to write down your thoughts before meeting the person, examine why you wrote it and remember the intent.

4) Deliver with empathy

The delivery of feedback matters greatly so be sure to frame your feedback with care for the person's growth. Look at the person with care when you deliver it. Remember the aim of your feedback; you are trying to seed growth, not kill it.

Moreover, when the person has understood your feedback, don't go on and on. Remember to stop and let the person receive it. Give the person time to receive and consider. In the first few instances when trust level is low between you and the person, the receiver might not have any response. However, if you have shown much care in how you deliver it, you will notice that the person will respond well eventually.

5) Keep on nurturing

Once you start to seed an improvement or an idea for a person's growth, don't just deliver and then go away. Take on a nurturing role. Whenever you notice that the person has improved, be sure to affirm it. In this way, the feedback will start to take root and a process of transformation will begin.

6) Don't take credit

Some givers are keen at giving feedback; they tend to want to claim the credit for change. Don't do it. Ultimately it is to the receiver's credit if growth and change have been realized. Our role as the giver is just to be the catalyst and it is critical that the receiver own the feedback. Don't ever take a superior position and credit for the change, be glad that change has happened. Moreover, wherever the person goes, he/she will surely remember your contribution.

At a recent feedback session called Bonsai organized by Consulus where the participants shared their comments with care for each other's growth

Hope you will find the Gardener's Approach useful too. Happy gardening and share with me your experiences.

About Lawrence Chong

He is the Co-founder and CEO of Consulus, an innovation consultancy with business management and multi-disciplinary design capabilities. Lawrence is a featured speaker at global events such as World Marketing Summit and World Brand Congress. He served as the Immediate Past President of Design Business Chamber Singapore. His thoughts on innovation and creativity appear in regional media such as Business Insider, Business Times, Marketing Magazine, Newsbase, TheEdge , Prestige Magazine, VTC10. In his personal capacity, he is a member of the Focolare, a movement in favor of building a united world through dialogue, economics and politics.

About Consulus

Consulus is a global innovation consultancy with business management and multi-disciplinary creative capabilities. Since 2004, the firm has helped companies, governments and non-profit groups achieve sustainable profit and growth by redesigning their organisations, business models and brand experiences based on the firm's method of unity. The company's competitive advantage comes from the insights gleaned from reviewing companies in 18 cities throughout the Asia Pacific regarding their business and organizational models. Read about the PurposeCore programme if your organization is looking for an effective transformation to meet the complex challenges of the 21st century. Read about PlaceCORE if you are a government or a developer seeking an innovative solution to redesign cities or a place for success. Consulus is a member of the Economy of Communion

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Consulus is the convener for Shape the World Conference, a creative thought-leadership event aimed at providing design-led strategies to inspire companies to innovate and shape the world. In 2013, Consulus launched the World Company Day initiative to inspire companies to shape the world creatively into a better place through daily work.

The Consulus Partnership is present in Singapore, Brunei, Vietnam, Sri Lanka, Thailand, Italy, Argentina, Bangladesh