How To Get What You Want AND Enjoy The Process

How do you do it?

I have had dozens and dozens of people ask this question of late…

And the reason people have been asking more and more often is because recently I picked up my family and we moved to Naples, FL in literally one week.

YES, my wife and two young children, got rid of our home in CT, got rid of most of our stuff to simplify life, got a new home, hired movers, enrolled our kiddos into an awesome school, and drove over 3-days…

All while…

Having many many companies grow, scale, and impact.

How do you do it?!?

Well, I decided to think about this question so I could share the exact equation and this is what I came up with...(and I am sure over time I will evolve this as well)!

Be an open book…

+Hold nothing back…

+Expose your raw emotions…

+Don’t allow yourself to get hurt…

AND

+Take action with insane tenacity…

This is my equation to get what you want AND enjoy the process! 

Okay, now let me explain each ingredient…

First…

Be an open book

The reason you feel so connected with me is because what you see is what you get. I encourage people, ALWAYS, to showcase the good, the bad, the exciting, the challenging of their lives. The greatest way people can connect is by learning about the real you - not the you that shows up perfectly manicured, with the perfect outfit, perfect car, perfect, perfect, perfect. I share real stories that happen with my kids, my wife, my businesses, and real thoughts that come to me daily. I get it - you will probably default to a place of discomfort, but the closer you can get to being REAL in all environments (especially in person/virtual meetings) the more you will get what you want and enjoy the process.

Second…

Hold nothing back

The single reason why I have no regrets is because I don’t hold back. When I am done with whatever...personal or professional...I know my absolute ALL was given. This does not mean I won’t find areas to improve - I ALWAYS DO - but based on whatever action I was committed to taking my all is what was delivered. This holds true for my workouts, nutritional decisions, time with my wife, my #1 role as a dad, all of my entrepreneurial endeavors, travel, moving, friendships, etc. I believe that giving 100% of yourself 100% of the time is easier than 87% of yourself 62% of the time. And remember - the outcome we are working towards is to help you get what you want and enjoy the process so hold nothing back! 

Third…

Expose your RAW emotions

For whatever reason, far too many people have been conditioned to think that their emotions equal weakness. “If you express how you truly feel, people will take advantage of you.” Where did this belief come from?!?!?! It’s total BS and in my life all you get is RAW emotion. If I am excited...you know it AND if I am not...you know it. I find zero reason to ever posture to anything other than my WHAT IS and my WHAT IS happens to be filled with raw emotion (which is also the case for every person on planet Earth). So, have the courage to expose how you feel, for better or for worse, and have enough self-confidence and self-awareness to know that no one can take advantage of you if you choose to remain in your power. AND AND this is a key ingredient to get what you want and enjoy the process. 

Fourth…

Don’t allow yourself to get hurt

This is extremely counter intuitive for most because I am telling you to be an open book, to hold nothing back, and to expose raw emotion and even one of these three, let alone all three, would almost guarantee that you get hurt...right?!?!?!?! WRONG! Getting hurt is a choice we make when we attach expectations to something other than ourselves, when we attach an outcome to something other than ourselves, and when we attach the thoughts of others to someone other than ourselves. This means that YOU are the beholder of whether or not you get hurt. And when you OWN this freakin power - NOTHING can stop you. I have never - and I repeat never - allowed someone to hurt me and I ALWAYS am an open book, hold nothing back, and expose RAW emotion. AND AND, I am no different than you. AND AND AND getting hurt will prevent you from what we are striving for which is to get what you want and enjoy the process

Fifth…

Take action with insane tenacity

I realized recently that I hate anticipation - that feeling of waiting for something you want - so I suffocate it with massive, insane, wild action in a concentrated fashion so that I go from A to B at warpspeed which helps limit or even eliminate anticipation. And you definitely don’t need to be as intense as I am, but you do need to XX your tenacity level with hyper-focused action based on what you are striving to achieve. This might mean waking up earlier, this might mean blocking all distraction from your day, this might mean time-blocking and sticking to it, this might mean exercising at a new intensity, this might mean committing to an extraordinary date night a week, this might mean hiding your phone so you can be 110% present with your kids, and this might mean something totally different than any of these examples for you but the ingredient is the ingredient...MASSIVE action with INSANE tenacity to get what you want and enjoy the process

Finally

Get what you want and Enjoy the process

In my opinion, this is what life is all about. You always get what you want and you always enjoy the process. And yes, this might ruffle feathers of people who don’t have what they want and they hate their process, but what if you strive for something different than your current bleak circumstance? What if you committed to the ingredients I shared above? What if you decided that your PAST and your CURRENT will not be your FUTURE? I am not here to preach, to tell you what to do, or to make you feel funny about yourself. I am simply here as a reflection and an example of someone who always gets what I want and who enjoys the process because I am an open book, hold nothing back, expose raw emotion, never allow myself to get hurt, and take action with insane tenacity. 

Try it on for size and let me know if you get what you want and enjoy the process!

Live with Intention,

JY