How to not get cussed out in class

Put yourself in this scenario:? You are at a client site teaching a new application or process that users must know for an upcoming implementation. You greet the participants as they enter and get settled in.

Class starts and each student briefly introduces themselves.? All is fine, until a stern-looking student has his turn by saying “My name is <name>, and I don’t know why we have to learn this ******* thing.” Be sure to substitute the asterisks with any profanity words you know.

The room is as quiet as a tomb. Everyone sits with bated breath, waiting for your response. What do you do? How do you get the class on track when it seems ready to fall off the rails before it begins?

Yes, that happened to me years ago. So, what did I really do?? More on that later.

Here is a reality check. Not everyone who attends our classes wants to be there. It is easy to imagine a room full of happy, enthusiastic students who are eager to learn and be inspired. Therein lies our first mistake.

The good news is some students do attend our classes voluntarily and are ready to learn. But that leaves another segment who are either indifferent or attending against their will. They may be vehemently against the business change our class is meant to address. Or their manager sent them to our class as a development opportunity to address a performance gap. Or, it may have been an ultimatum -- attend this class, or else...

Regardless of their reasons, the last thing we need is for them to bring their negative energy into our class and sabotage the learning experience for everyone.?

How do we handle those forced attendees? Here are a few tips from my own experience, while also addressing how I handled my cussing student situation.

Anticipate resistance.?Every class, we should keep in the back of our minds that some students simply do not want to be there. If possible, observe the body language of students prior to the start of class, because it can reveal a lot, even in a virtual setting. For my cussing student, I noticed how he walked into the room, plopped in a chair, and sat with folded arms glaring at me. ?I suspected right away he was not thrilled to be there. My instincts said to keep my guard up and stay alert for potential resistance.? Because I had raised the caution flag in my mind ahead of time, I was more prepared for when it was his turn to speak.

Diffuse resistance immediately, yet professionally. ?Did my cussing student step over the line with his blunt remark?? Absolutely.? But it is more important to not sink to that level. It is ideal to just pause, maintain eye contact, and give yourself a few seconds to formulate a calm, yet forceful response that maintains classroom control.

In my situation, I looked the guy square in the eye, maintained a neutral face, and slowly nodded my head.? My reply went something like this: “Well sir, in your own way, you were very honest, and on some level, I can appreciate that.”? Then I responded to the whole group with “I realize this change could be difficult for some of us, but since we were all asked to be here by our leaders, me included, how about we make the best of our time here, keep an open mind, and we will all get through this together.” I then immediately moved on to the next person.

By briefly acknowledging him and then speaking to the group, I discreetly took the attention away from just him and made it about the whole class – because it really is about the whole class. I did not ignore him, but I also did not give him the oxygen to vent further. As a result, he was subdued the rest of the class and gave me no further hassle.

Be proactive. ?Since that day, I make it a practice in my general class introductions to acknowledge that some may not want to be there.? I may say something like “I realize some of you can think of a hundred other places you would rather be than in this room.?But I promise to do what I can to make this worthwhile for all of us.” This has helped diffuse any tension at the beginning of class. Also, because I acknowledge it upfront, when the students introduce themselves, a few sometimes politely admit they are one of those who didn’t want to be there. They seem to appreciate the display of empathy. This becomes valuable information, because it leads to the last important action item.

Reach out to them individually.? If anyone admits they had to be in your class, make it a point to check in with them during a break.? Just a simple statement like “Are you doing okay?” or “Are we hitting the marks for you so far?” or “Hope this class is better than you may have thought.” Any comment that comes from the heart and shows genuine empathy is usually all it takes to make their class experience more positive -- or at least less negative.

Truth be told, I did not apply this technique to my cussing student, mostly because he already decided he hated the change and would not budge.? My goal was to keep him quiet during class, not to win him over.? It is important for facilitators to pick their battles carefully.

If you are a new trainer, these negative classroom situations should not discourage you. As with anything, these tips will take some time and practice.? But I can promise you will increase the likelihood of neutralizing these unfortunate situations by keeping the following in mind:

• Do not take anything personally
• Keep your emotions in check and maintain composure
• Keep the focus on the entire group

If you are reading this sentence, thanks for staying with me until the end. I would enjoy any additional tips or feedback you may have.