How Generous Are You?
“The heart that gives, gathers.” – Tao Te Ching
A recent online survey I took began with a question about what I’d do if given 10 free lottery tickets. I could keep them all or give some portion of them to the next survey recipient. I chose to give five. Then it was on to the survey, which had nothing at all to do with lottery tickets or chance. It was, however, a survey that sought to determine generosity.
I was a bit astounded at that, thinking back to my line of reasoning about why I chose to give away half of my tickets. I figured that someone else could possibly benefit from them, while I’d still have a chance with my remaining five.
How generous are you? Would you be willing to part with any or all of your lottery tickets in a similar situation? What about how generous you are to others in real life? Do you stand aside to let others go ahead of you in a line at the grocery store if they only have one or a few items and your cart is filled? Do you let someone take cuts at the bathroom if they ask? Do you give money to charities with a proven record of actually helping those intended?
Generosity can occur in many ways, large and small. Some would argue that there is no level of generosity that is too small, just as there is no ceiling on how generous you can be. It is a choice each individual makes.
Sometimes how generous you are depends on your mood, how great things have gone that day (or how badly things have unraveled). You might be more inclined to be generous first thing in the morning or right after lunch. For others, the desire to be generous may come at home after dinner when you’re tending to email and get an appeal from one of the charities you donate to.
What does being generous do for you? It’s not selfish to consider this question. Many scholars, philosophers and ethicists have studied the issue. The 2014 Science of Generosity Initiative at Notre Dame found a causal relationship between generosity and happiness. They also found that in order to produce benefits for the giver, generosity has to be regularly practiced.
It isn’t the amount (of money, time, things), but the intention and the consistency.
So, whether it’s donating blood, dropping off food or clothing or other items, contributing to disaster relief or Habitat for Humanity or another worthy cause, helping a neighbor in need, even listening to a friend’s woes when you have other pressing needs, giving on a regular basis will pay handsome dividends.
What if you start to give but your heart isn’t really in it? Can you learn to be generous? Here, the Notre Dame researchers say there’s a “fake-it-til-you-make-it” aspect of generosity. You might start off dubious about being generous and find that it wasn’t that bad after all, so you might be inclined to do it again.
Being generous does make you feel good, especially if you are generous with your immediate family. Just be sure to expand your circle of generosity to include those outside the nuclear family.
Back to those 10 lottery tickets. How many would you give to the next person?
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