How to Find Your Next Chapter of Joy

By Jackie Roby

What’s your next chapter? That always sounded so big to me. I’ve moved across the country, gotten married, started a business. These are big chapters. In reality, we can turn the page to something new inside of us that shifts our future. And this can happen through travel.

Even with all of the internal work on do on myself, I knew something was missing. Since I practice what I preach, I turned to wellness travel. Advivum Journeys was hosting their Radical Sabbatical in Kent and it was calling my name. The description was “Come live fully, unapologetically, from the centre of your being.” Not entirely sure what that meant at the time. Over the pandemic, I met Tania Carriere, the founder of Advivum Journeys, and I was immediately drawn to her. I connected with how she focused on the inner work. Every time I spoke to her she brought a sense of calm that moved me into a more peaceful state. Even on the days she was out of sorts, Tania was still the kindest and most centered person. I knew I trusted her. It was time to get radical.

First Draft

The journey started with pre-work. I was sent two workbooks to complete that helped me to get a clearer picture of what I’m experiencing. In hindsight, I think it cleared out what I thought were the issues getting in my way. It also introduced me to my top five strengths, which were spot on. Love of Learning being number one on my list followed by Honesty, Kindness, Fairness, and Perspective. (If you’re interested in seeking yours, visit viacharacter.org.) I had to identify the past version of me that I wanted to rely on and send a picture. I imagined Little Jackie would reemerge at some point. That’s cool – she cute.

Starting the Sabbatical

Fast forward to traveling across the pond. I hadn’t been to London in eight years, which was shocking to me considering how often I used to visit. Once I landed at Heathrow, it felt easy and natural to be there. After all of this time, it still felt like a second home (Boston is always number one – for now). I was tasked with taking trains to Kent, which was a bit daunting at first. However, I know my anxiety and gave myself more than enough time to prepare for twists and turns.

Two hours later, I arrive at Canterbury West Station and was looking for five women I’ve never met whom I’ll be sharing a taxi with. Color me shocked when one of them shouts, “There she is! I knew there was a Jackie coming, but I didn’t realize it was Jackie Roby!” Have I met this person before? In a virtual room or on social media? Oh crap. Think Jackie, think. Within a few minutes, I learned this was our first interaction so I breathed a sigh of relief. And then smiled knowing my message of #TravelCanHeal is spreading.

Getting Radical

We arrive at Goodnestone House, my home for the next four nights. Tania, Anne, and Melanie greet us and take each of us to our assigned rooms. After settling in, we meet in circle for the first time. “This week you have no backstory. None of your roles or titles have a place here. No telling of your history. It’s your task to live in who you are at this moment and the chapter you’re writing for the future.” Well, that was a first for me and quite a challenge. I must say it was one of my favorite takeaways from the week. It challenged me to stay present and be deeper in my dreams. Plus, it helped 12 strangers find commonalities and create bonds of sisterhood within less than 24 hours. I never thought that was possible. Especially with my newly recognized social anxiety.

I’m a bit of an open book about my feelings. I went into this thinking I was on a quest for self-worth. But sitting in this room with the energy of these beautiful souls, I realized I was truly searching to trust myself. Just like a fully booked calendar, I needed to make room for that new piece of me to emerge. So what was I going to let go of? Enter Little Jackie designed to be one of my muses for the week. Tania asked, “What question would she ask you to support your quest?” Well, that was easy. Who’s voice are you listening to? And why aren’t we famous yet?

Living My Next Chapter

The next morning I had to identify what burden I was carrying that was hindering my quest to trust myself. And then I had to name it… outloud… in front of 14 women I just met the day before. I almost didn’t say the truth because I’ve never said it to anyone outside of my trusted circle. But I know that true healing takes courage so I spoke the words I’ve been hiding for almost 40 years. “My name is Jackie and I choose to carry the burden of my parents’ conditional love on my quest to trust myself.”

Only my therapist, husband, and sisters know the intensity of the healing work I’ve done around this. What I never expected was to leave the UK without that pain that has been plaguing me. Because of this retreat and the epiphanies designed by Tania, I was given a gift that will last me a lifetime. This retreat provided the time, space, and support I needed to care for me and only me. Not my business, my family, or the grocery list (it’s never ending) – just me. And with that, I stand here today claiming my self-trust. Are you ready to get radical?

Jackie Roby https://inspiredjourneyconsulting.com/2022/06/14/how-to-find-your-next-chapter-of-joy/