How to Find Good Advice to Change Your Life
Thanks to the internet, everyone from your eccentric Aunt Sue to your weird stoner friend from high school thinks they are quotable. They publish content, add their name, and expect people to quote them as readily as they do Oscar Wilde and Mark Twain.
Everyone has a soapbox and so bad advice is everywhere, but there are some gems out there as well. They’re probably not coming from your aunt or old friend, but if you know where to look, you can find advice that will change your life for the better.
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Imagine that you’re an expert in your favorite hobby. Maybe you’re a watch collector and a master of horology. Maybe you have a passion for football, Renaissance art, or ancient Greek history.
You get paid for your expertise. It’s your profession and it earns you 7-figures a year, but it’s also your passion, and something you love more than anything else.
At the end of the day — after you’ve spent 10 hours buried in history books, writing sports articles, or studying paintings — you bore your partner and friends by talking about the minutiae of your work.
You decide to start telling the world and putting your knowledge to good use, and so you’re faced with two options.
Do you:
Obviously, you’re going to opt for the former. You don’t need that $99.99, and considering you’re making 7-figures a year and are an expert in your field, if you ever did need to make some extra cash, there would be easier ways of doing it (such as keynote speaking).
And yet, every day there are entrepreneurs selling “the secrets to success” via online courses. They claim that they can make a million a month through a few secret hacks, and yet they spend all of their free time trying to sell cheap courses.
Needless to say, these entrepreneurs don’t have successful businesses or amazing secrets. You?are?the business, and there is?no?secret.
If you want to learn the best information from the most knowledgeable people, you have to look for free content, the content that is created out of passion and not profit.
We’re often led to believe that paying more means we’re getting more, and for most things in life, that’s true. But when it comes to business knowledge and great advice, the best content is free.
I speak from a place of experience, as I have a?free podcast, lots of?free guides, and this blog, and it’s more viable for me to do these passion projects than it is for me to devote weeks to creating a paid course.
YouTube is your friend when it comes to useful free content. Simply find the experts in your field, see what content they are publishing, recommending, and appearing on, and consume!
Find a Mentor
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Behind most successful people you will find a dedicated mentor. It’s the person that helped them, advised them, and put them on the right course.
I am not just talking about business or professional mentors, either. I’m talking about family members who took the time to listen, understand, and advise; friends and colleagues who took them under their wing.
We’re all a little stupid and na?ve when we’re young, and if we’re new to a particular profession or hobby, that naivety will remain. Having someone to help is essential for shortening the learning curve.
Usually, when I stress the importance of finding a mentor, people tell me that they don’t have anyone like that in their life. But most people are willing to help if you give them a chance. The issue is not that they don’t exist, but that you’re not receptive to them.
For example, I recently spoke with a young mother who had given birth to their first baby just 6 weeks prior. One of the baby’s grandmothers was constantly trying to give her 2 cents and while she was being nice about it, the young mother became angry and eventually argued with her.
“I know how to raise my baby more than you do!” she had told her. But when I spoke with the young mother, she reeled off a dozen issues that she’d been having and didn’t understand.
“Is it normal for this to happen?”
“What does it mean when she does this?”
Her mother had raised 6 children and had helped to raise 4 grandchildren. She was experienced. She had all of the answers that my friend desperately needed, but because she was stubborn, she refused the help.
You see the same thing happen with professionals and business owners:
“I’ve been an aspiring author for 3 years. I know everything and don’t need to learn from a successful author, even if they have published 30 books.”
“So what if my friend has been in business for 5 years? I’m smarter than him, I don’t need his advice regarding my new startup.”
When I say, “find a mentor”, I don’t mean that you should look for a wise old Mr. Miyagi who is imbued with the wisdom of the ancients. I mean that you should look for someone who has experience in a particular area and listen to what they have to say.
Focus on Relevance
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You can never underestimate the power of a strong network. The right people can advise you, support you, collaborate with you, and even invest in or buy your business.
But how should you build that network? If you’re introverted and painfully shy, it’s better for you to network through sites like LinkedIn than to do it in person. Emails and instant messages make more sense than speaking at an event — not only will the latter make you nervous, but it’s not the best way of showcasing your personality and skills.
By the same token, advice that is great for a hard-working freelancer may not be so great for someone who runs a retail business in the city.
It’s not just about business, either. Going for a morning jog is great advice, but not if you’re severely disabled or agoraphobic. It’s an extreme example, but the point is that we all have unique needs, different minds, and different lifestyles, and so the best advice comes from people in similar positions or people who understand where you’re coming from.