How to fall in love with your work-life again

Our relations are what make our life; the one with ourselves, family, friends, kids, and all those important to us. But, in the middle of all this we often end up ignoring one of the most critical relationships; the one we share with our job, our professional life.

It’s true that relationships are a lot of work. You have to devote time, do things for each other, express your love towards those you care about. And we do that, don’t we, to preserve harmony in our relations. But, we need to ask, how often do we really spend time to save our relationship with job. I suppose, rarely! It’s surprising, isn’t it? Considering our entire financial freedom is dependent upon it.

If you have reached that stage in your job, where you have started contemplating joining some other company, you might want to pause and reconsider. May be the problem isn’t the job after all. Perhaps it’s something else entirely. Your attitude towards it, perhaps? Just remind yourself, that may be all you need is try a little harder to make things work, instead of quitting it just yet.

Reasons why we fall out of love with our work life

1. The newness at work is fading away - It’s only natural that after a certain point of time, monotony at work will hit you. Even the most fun and interesting jobs have moments when things feel plain dull. Initially, it’s all unicorns and rainbows and your learning curve is really steep. But after a few months, that curve begins to go down and learning seems sluggish. You’re just repeating the same old stuff every single day. Retaining that freshness in work and looking for something new feels like looking for a needle in a haystack.
2. You don’t like what you do - Steve Jobs told us ‘do what you love, and you won’t have to work a day’. While there may be nothing wrong with that, I still beg to differ. My favorite job is eating chocolates and watching movies on Netflix all day long. But, what kind of job would that land me?
   
   It’s about time you ditched the idea of landing that perfect job. Because let's face it, that would require countless iterations of one job after another before you could finally say with confidence ‘this is what I love doing’.
   
   Instead of sticking to the idea of finding your perfect match, try and develop a love for what you are already doing. This is the only kind of mindset that will bring stability in your career. Otherwise, you could have the best job in the world, and you would still not like it.
   
   Think about the good sides of your job. Although you can do this exercise mentally also, but it’s better to use a pen and paper to write them down. Jotting down those points would really help you see more clearly just how many good aspects of your job you are ignoring.
3. Too many expectations - When we join a new company, we are completely unfamiliar with things. We don’t know where the coffee machine is, or the corner where all the gossipping happens. And in a way, that lack of knowledge turns out to actually be productive. There are no preconceived notions about the boss, or manager, or colleagues. That’s why people initially take criticism in a healthy way.
   
   It’s only a matter of time before we start having form too many expectations from those around us. We start expecting leverage at work. And when expectations are not met, that's the first threshold to frustration.
   
   Do not assume that your boss will approve of everything you decide, or that your colleagues are not going to have occasional disagreements. The only way to avoid frustration is to keep your expectation at the lowest, yet hope for the best that things will work out. Imagine today is the day you join the company, and meet everyone like you are meeting them for the very first time.
4. Your boss is a whacko - You know what they say, ‘people don’t leave jobs, they leave managers’. The quality of relationship between and an employee and his boss is a defining factor in terms of how satisfied and happy a person feels with his job. So, it pays to put in those extra efforts that will keep your boss happy and content. A major cause of discontentment at workplace is a boss who does not match with your idea of what an ideal boss should be like.
   
   The thing is, if you ever pay attention, you will observe certain behavioural patterns in people. Look for those patterns in your boss’ behaviour and accept them as part of his/her personality. For example, if your boss is very particular about daily reports, then be sure to hand the report no matter what. Just be more observant about what your boss wants and then act accordingly (as long as it does not involve compromising your own integrity).

Here’s what I suggest

Start the day at your office as if it was the very first day of your job. Try to relive those joyous moments when you were hired. Those moments of triumph and how everything felt brand new. The way it felt like a fresh start. A brand new love affair. Imagine the goodness of the honeymoon period of your job, and look for ways to bring that newness back into work.

Do not start off the day with the thought, ‘I can’t believe I have to suffer through another day at work’. Recall how receptive you were to everything when the job had started. Try working with the same mindset once again. That alone will suffice to make you fall in love with your job all over again.

1. Look for ways to rekindle that passion for learning
   As discussed earlier, everyone goes through a phase where learning seems to have come to halt. That’s when we descend into monotony. Look for the areas where you can learn new things. Don’t just settle with what you already know. That’s the only way to kill monotony at work. Be ready to explore new areas. Challenge yourself. What are the unchartered territories that you haven't explored yet. What aspects of your job are you still unfamiliar with? It’s all about your willingness for embracing growth. When you really want it, everything can teach you something. Otherwise, even the most rewarding job will fail to make you grow and learn.
   
   Tell your boss that you want to take on new responsibilities and discuss ways how you can do that. No one can read you mind about what you want, so you are going to have to express your willingness for taking on new responsibilities. People are busy in their own worlds, so you will have to make yourself heard.
2. Come to the terms with the fact that perfect job is an illusion
   We look at Hollywood stars and think how lucky they are to be living that life. Everybody is in all awe of it. But, unless you have actually lived that life, you cannot really know for sure just how much work being a celebrity is.
   
   No job is easy, or at least no job is perfect. Perfection is nothing but really an illusion. So, instead of waiting for that best job opportunity to come knocking at your door, take what you have and turn it into best. Otherwise, if you continue to wait for that perfect job, you might end-up waiting for an eternity.

And with these simple steps you can eventually fall in love with your work-life, again!