How do your Past, Present, and Future affect your current decision, Let's Find out!

Just when I had it all mapped out,

The winds changed direction;

And I lost my way.

I tend to panic when I am thrown off the course,?

Frantically trying to get back on track.

(Because I was supposed to be there by now.)

But now I am realising that I am beating myself up,

For not being able to keep up with the world.

But did I ever question the destination??

I don’t even know what I want yet!?

Obviously, I don’t know where I am going.?

But I may not be lost.?

I just need to find ‘my’ way!?

The above is a nursery rhyme I found on the Internet. It is used to teach (very early on, and rightly so) kids about charting their life path and making their ‘own’ decisions.?

And this little rhyme rings true for adults, too. How many of us have had thoughts that are reflected above? Most of us.?

Imagine standing at a crossroads, knowing you need to make a decision but feeling completely stuck.?

Sounds familiar??

Whether it’s a career choice, a business decision, or even a personal goal, many of us find ourselves paralyzed when it comes to taking action. But why is that? What’s stopping us from moving forward?

First of all – you’re not alone.?

In today’s fast-paced world, decision paralysis is a common problem.?

Let me begin by stating the obvious – Decision Paralysis is the inability to make a decision when faced with multiple options that are difficult to compare. It can also be called "analysis paralysis" or "choice paralysis.

The truth is, that the barriers to decision-making are more complex than they seem and there are many factors at play. Stay with me and we shall delve into the challenges and solutions that can help you make these taxing challenges.

“A person often meets their destiny on the road they took to avoid it.”

– Ancient proverb?

Some Barriers To Effective Decision-Making

1. Past Failures

Every time we contemplate a decision, our mind drifts back to past failures. Think back to a time when you failed at something. Perhaps you launched a business that didn’t take off or pursued a career path that didn’t pan out. That sting of failure can linger, making us hesitant to try again.?

We start asking ourselves, “What if I fail again?” This fear creates a mental block that stops us from even considering new opportunities.

Then, those sharp and rude voices of criticism, whether from others or from within, can be incredibly damaging. Perhaps you’ve been told, “You’re not good enough,” or “You’ll never succeed.”?

Over time, these negative voices can become internalized, leading to self-sabotage. We start believing these criticisms and make them a part of our identity – as a result, avoid making decisions that could invite more judgment.

Past experiences of burnout, stress, or failure can lead us to question our abilities. “I couldn’t handle it last time, so why should this time be any different?”?

We convince ourselves that we’re incapable, and this belief keeps us in our comfort zones, avoiding decisions that could lead to growth. This fear can be paralyzing, stopping us in our tracks before we even begin.

Now might be the right time to bring your attention to – Thomas Edison, who failed thousands of times before successfully inventing the light bulb. Imagine if he had let his past failures prevent him from continuing his work.?

The world might still be in the dark—literally!

Anyway. On to the next challenge.?

2. Present Assumptions?

“Stay in the present and make a decision. The present is the only moment we have.”

This is advice every guru and motivational book throws at you, right? But practically speaking – how applicable is it? How many times have we forcefully tried to decide by being in the present moment – only to be shrouded by the conditioning of the past?

Even when we try to focus on the present, we often assume that making a decision will require too much time and effort. We often believe that the effort required to achieve our goals is insurmountable. “This will take years,” we tell ourselves, and the thought of such a long journey can be overwhelming. We start comparing our progress to others, thinking, “She took ten years to get there—do I have that kind of time?”

This line of thinking starts to play on repeat in our minds, creating a mental dialogue filled with doubts and fears. “This will require so much hard work,” we tell ourselves. “What if I’m not up to the challenge?” This constant replay of how difficult and time-consuming the process inflates a stress balloon inside our heads—a balloon that keeps getting bigger and heavier.?

Eventually, the burden becomes so overwhelming that we’re paralyzed by it.

3. Future Fears

So the past has happened, and the present is going on. This leaves us with the future. Do you know why people want to predict the future? Because the future is unseen and scary.?

But what is the future if not a manifestation of our past and present??

And if our past and present are decorated with fear – so will our future.??

As we look to the future, a crippling fear often takes hold—the assumption that we’re destined to fail. This belief, deeply ingrained in our minds, can be one of the most significant obstacles to making decisions and taking action.

This assumption doesn’t arise out of nowhere; it’s usually rooted in our past experiences. Perhaps we’ve faced setbacks before—failed business ventures, missed opportunities, or personal disappointments.?

These past failures leave an imprint, a mental scar that tells us, “If it didn’t work out then, why should it work out now?” Instead of viewing failure as a learning experience or a stepping stone to success, we start to see it as an inevitable outcome.

This assumption of inevitable failure becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Because we’re so convinced that we’ll fail, we subconsciously sabotage our efforts. We don’t give our full energy to the project, or we procrastinate, making failure more likely.?

In some cases, we might not even try at all, convinced that it’s better not to take the risk than to face the disappointment of another failure.

The paralysis that comes from this fear can be devastating. It prevents us from seizing opportunities, exploring new possibilities, and achieving our goals. We start to live in a state of inaction, where the fear of failure outweighs the potential for success.

So, now what??

In such dire situations when living with fear has become a lifestyle – we need to start closing the valve between decisions and fear.?

Entertain a thought with me here – say, you were attacked by a tiger. What would your first thought be??

Would you think – “Oh dear, the tiger will kill me.” “Tigers are apex predators, no way I am surviving this.” “I saw on that show how a tiger nearly killed a man.”

OR?

Would you run with all your might and plan your escape??

You’d do the latter because the stakes are high. And when the stakes are high, your thoughts shut and you just execute.?

Here are solutions that can help you close that valve and make decision-making easy for you –?

• A Model of Excellence

One powerful way to overcome decision paralysis is by having a role model—someone who has achieved what we aspire to do. When we can see, hear, and feel closely connected to someone who has succeeded, it creates a mental pathway that makes it easier for us to believe in our potential.

• Clarity of Intention

Sometimes, we hesitate because we’re not clear about why we want to make a decision. Our intentions may be muddled, borrowed from others, or not fully aligned with our true desires. To make effective decisions, we need to clarify our intentions and ensure they’re in alignment with what we genuinely want.

• Harnessing Fear as a Motivator

Fear doesn’t have to be a negative force. It can be a powerful motivator. Think about how you would react if a doctor told you that you needed to make a lifestyle change to avoid serious health consequences. That fear would drive you to take immediate action. We need to apply this same concept to our decision-making. By recognizing the potential consequences of inaction, we can use fear to propel us forward.

A famous example of this would be – Jeff Bezos, who famously took a “regret minimization framework” approach when deciding to start Amazon. He imagined looking back at his life and regretting not leaping. This fear of future regret drove him to make the decision that ultimately changed the retail industry.

• Visualize Your Options

You can just lay out your options physically. For instance, if you have three choices, imagine stepping into each one. As you do, observe how your body reacts—are you tense, calm, excited? This can reveal a decision your subconscious is leaning toward. Studies show body responses often signal our deeper preferences before we consciously recognize them.

• Consult Mentors or Experts

Sometimes, a fresh perspective can break through decision paralysis. Speaking to a mentor helps clarify options you might not have considered. According to a Stanford study, 85% of successful leaders attribute their decision-making abilities to mentor feedback.

• The "Perceptual Position" Technique

This involves stepping into each decision as if it’s already made. Stay in the moment, mentally live through it, and assess how comfortable or anxious you feel. This method, popular in NLP & Executive coaching, taps into gut instincts, which research shows often drive 90% of our decisions.

• Take a Pause, and Revisit

It's okay to delay a decision, even if you've done all the research. A Harvard Business Review article highlights how stepping back allows your brain to process information in the background, sometimes leading to clearer choices later.

• Embrace Imperfection

Remember, no decision is perfect. Often, waiting for the "right time" can lead to missed opportunities. Studies on entrepreneurship show that quick, flexible decision-making leads to better outcomes than waiting for ideal conditions.

My Personal Journey With Challenges In Decision Making?

I am no hero. I’ve faced these challenges too.?

There were times when I was paralyzed by fear, criticism, and doubt. But what helped me push through was a simple mindset shift: I didn’t give myself any other option.

Sometimes it really has to be Plan A or no plan.??

I decided that this is what I’m going to do—no alternatives, no second-guessing. It was that clarity and determination that helped me move forward.

Now that we’ve explored the barriers to decision-making, it’s time to take action.?

Remember, the only thing stopping you from making decisions is you. So, what are you waiting for??

Start making those decisions today.

?And if you’re still feeling stuck, don’t hesitate to reach out—I’m here to help.

Connect with me on LinkedIn or email me at [email protected]

I will see you in the next article!

Cheers,

Ridhima Dua