How do you treat yourself?

Self-discrimination is the practice or habit of discriminating against oneself; being too hard upon oneself.

Self Discrimination is the biased view that we hold for ourselves blaming others to be the cause for it without being aware of it.

It makes you feel that the perception about self is the ultimate reality and the insight that self concept can give you may lead to a distinction of what kind of discrimination is riding ahead of your thoughts.

 Self-discrimination:

 A.  Common Belief: Self Discrimination is part of human nature and everyone has one. Eg. I am not good enough. I don’t deserve it. Raman was eligible for international travel and stay in five star hotels as perks by the company, since long these perks were unused and he would book and cancel and every time found a suitable reason, people thought he is magpie of money and the reality that stopped him from availing this benefit was his common belief of ‘I don’t deserve it’.

 B.  Human Element Assumption: Self Discrimination is a form of Self Concept which is persistent way of pulling self away from the reality and considering the belief as ultimate reality. Rigid behavior refrain us from the self awareness and actions on awareness resulting in the unrevealed concepts that you use in differentiating self from others. Eg. She can achieve the sales target; she has good leads and high contacts. Input to self is other person is better, she has better sources and the self discrimination is on basis of no confidence is self.

  C.  Patterns of Self Discrimination:

•   Behaving like a victim
•      Disapproval of Self
•      Considering others to be competent
•      Inferiority complex
•      Confused Identity
•      Struggling with self concept
•      Bullying
•      Humiliation

D.  Side effects of Self Discrimination on an Individual:

•     Adverse effects on health (heart problem, memory issues etc.)
•      Be victim or victimizer
•      Depression
•      Disconnection with social groups
•      Experience Rejection
•      Frustration
•      Hurting Self Growth
•      Low self esteem
•      Low immunity to discrimination
•      Negative impact on emotional well being
•      Non performance in relationships and workplace
•      Stress

E.  Impact of Self Discrimination on Business:

•   Depressed Employees
•     Struggle in communicating
•     Non-performance in work place
•      Affects Work Atmosphere
•     Low Productivity, lower profits

F.   How to avoid Self Discrimination:

•   Be aware and catch yourself
•      Stop yourself and think
•      Go Beyond the old rudiments
•      Acceptance of change is inevitable
•      Be open and see what’s possible
•      Make notes and revisit them

 G.  How can the supervisors/ company support the employees:

•     Create proper feedback structure
•      Help in identifying the Self Discrimination
•      Counseling
•      Encourage for participation
•      Opportunities for training

 “Discrimination causes self-discrimination and vice-versa.”

Archie had been discriminated by the friends, family and neighbors for her inability to cope up with job search and over a period she herself started thinking the same and treated self as less capable than others and during every interview she would have health issues. Being too hard on self is not being disciplinary but being against self growth.

Self-Discrimination can be based on many different saturated feelings and behaviors copied from the people around you it can be a cause of concern for yourself relating to characteristics like your image, authority, age, gender, weight, ethnicity, religion, education, and career.

Priyank was interior decorator with wonderful ideas and worthy of his position in the field even the competitors looked up to his work. He would sometimes amaze people with creativity and at times was incapable to meet the simplest requirement of the client, which then his efficient team had to tackle.

Every incident of his failure was related to his success. Every time he won a trophy, appreciation or had tremendous successful project the very next assignment he was unable to meet up to the expectations. The real issue here was he could not embrace the appreciation due to the thoughts of not being good enough.

Usually there are dominant group and minority group as parties to discrimination but in self-discrimination we play both the roles and keep struggling to be in a state where we ourselves can let us grow. Our harmful actions are not the ones we are looking for but it is certainly the free gift pack with the self-discrimination

If only he would have been aware of that this self-discrimination is limiting his capability, the story would have been different.

It’s all in the self-concept we have created and yet we feel bound by the limitations.

We live our life uncomfortable and trying to find out what’s wrong. It’s in front of us and yet we have no method of seeing the life outside the screen of Self Discrimination.

You cannot let it continue nor break your habit.

BCon Japan Inc. a globally renowned consulting firm offers The Human Element developed by Will Shutz, the founder of FIRO Theory. BCon help companies get the most out of their people, by supporting people to relate powerfully with themselves as well as with others and create a highly empowering organizational culture.

For more information please visit at https://www.thehumanelement.com/ and www.bconglobal.com