How do you know when it is okay to stop?

I had a call with a client today that started with me trying to work out how best I could serve him and help him within my business, and ended with me pretty much talking him out of working with me at all.

Some people might think that makes me pretty lousy at sales calls, but actually, it means that I am very good. ;-)

You see the goal of a sales call is not to bend them to your will, or try to make them a fit for your product or service, it's to find those who genuinely could do with your help and then to offer to help them.

But that's not what I want to talk to you about today...

I want to talk about the WHY I didn't even pitch him on working with me.

There's a lot of noise and confusion in the online space and a lot of metaphors that get thrown around quite liberally.

One of those is the metaphor of the dog that won't get off the nail.

It is used pretty widely in the NWMing space to get people into action within their business.

Their current life is the nail that they need to get off so that they can get into action and create the life they dream of.

And mostly that is right...

Most people just like to bitch and moan about their lives but never actually do anything at all about that.

They come up with justifications and excuses and they tell those to all the people they hang out with, who are also telling justifications and excuses.

(If you are reading this email there is a very good chance that that is NOT YOU.)

So here we have the dog, whining about sitting on this nail, but the pain he is in is not bad enough to actually make him move.

And so he sits and whines, and never really gets to live a life of freedom from that pain.

But what if it wasn't that the dog had to get off the nail. but that the nail just had to be removed so the dog could be comfortable where he is?

Granted, this scenario is not as common as the first one, but it is out there...

So I want to talk about that now.

Earlier on I mentioned all the noise in the online space. There is a lot of pressure to succeed, to create a life of freedom, and to finally hit your goals.

The question is, are the goals that you set for yourself, goals that you actually need to attain to be happy and free, or are they being predetermined for you by what you see others achieving?

You see the gentleman I talked to today, had already achieved an amazing amount of success within his business. He was into multiple 5 figures, didn't actually really need to work again, and yet he had this nagging thought that he should have achieved more.

On one hand, he knew that he had the capacity to build much, much bigger, and felt disappointed with himself that he hadn't.

On the other hand was the knowledge that he and his family had an amazing life because of the hard work he had already put in, and there were so many other things he loved that he could be doing.

The nagging sensation had him toing and froing, building and then not building, so that he was spending all this time and energy not really getting where he wanted to go.

he would push ahead because he would decided to go for it, and then retreat back to the comfort of his amazing life.

he had an internal tug-o-war going on, fuelled by the disappointment that came from seeing others do much better than he had.

In the first he was the dog, needing to get off the nail...

In the second he was the dog, needing to remove the nail so that he could be truly happy with where he was.

The point of all of this is to be aware of why you are doing things, and to take a long, hard look at your goals.

Are the goals that you set for yourself being set for THE RIGHT REASONS?

Are they want you truly want for yourself, or are they what you have been led to believe you should be aiming for?

There comes a time for most of us when it is time to stop, back up a little and give ourselves some breathing space. To start to enjoy the life we have created, and to be okay with our choice to not grow bigger.

The trick is being able to let go of those preconceived industry norms, those things that we have been told we should be wanting, and those things we have been told we can have.

The trick is to work out what is right for you, and to stand by it.

So when is it okay to accept the level of success that we have?

I believe one of the ways you can tell, is to weigh up what you have now and the life that gives you, versus what you have been told you should be working towards (7 figures a month ;-) ) and the time and energy that will take to get, and then see which of those two options you prefer.

If where you are now is going to give you an amazing life, and you find that you personally have no reason to want more, then it's time to reconsider your next move.

If you realise you will never be truly satisfied with the level you are currently at, then it is time to get off that nail.

We spend so much of our time in limbo, not putting in the effort and action that we need to fully reach our goals, and then being unhappy about it.

Some people go their whole lives like this...

That is no way to live a life.

So where do you go from here?

It's time to look at what you want and to work out if you want it for the right reason. Do you want it because it will truly make you happier and make you feel complete, or are you being driven by some deeper, underlying belief?

Is there some self-worth issue that is riding you into the ground? Are you striving to prove something to other people other than to yourself? Or even to prove something to yourself, even though the effort it will require will outweigh the benefit?

If any of those are true, go easy on yourself, and tell yourself that it is okay to stop, enjoy where you are right now, and to smell the roses for a while.

Having an online business is hard work...

You need to make sure that you are doing it for the right reason.

If on self-reflection you realise you are stuck toing-and-froing in between action and inaction, lost as to why you can't move forwards even though you want it desperately, then you are most probably dealing with some sort of unconscious belief system.

If you don't sort that out now, chances are you will never break free.

Luckily, that is just one of the obstacles that I help my clients to overcome. Those pesky belief systems that keep them trapped in their old life, even while they doing everything they can to break free. 

Insidious, debilitating, and harmful to your health. These beliefs are like putting an old, outdated engine into a Ferrari...

Even though it looks amazing, and is shiny and new, it still is going to function like an old clanker.

Right, I know you are busy, and if I haven't made my point by now I am never going to. 

If you are not getting the results in your online business that you want, and would like to take a look at why, jump on my calendar for a Success Session. 

https://donnajoyusher.com/success-session

In Your Corner

Donna Joy