"How do you know if you are going to stop listening to the sales pitch in less than two minutes?"

@Gary Ellis pushed me (in a good way) into this article in the comment section of his great post HERE. And, while I really don’t consider myself much of an expert in much of anything (except being curious) Gary’s desire to hear my thoughts on sales provoked some questions.

What could a sales professional learn from me, a glorified wrench turner who much prefers creating stuff than, well, most things? Gary asked, specifically, “How do you know within 2 minutes if you will keep listening to a pitch or start thinking about anything else?”

Allow me to answer in three semi-true stories (hat-tip, Jimmy Buffett).

Scenario #1 – You don’t know me, don’t tell me you can help.

I receive a call from a roofing company. The sales professional starts by asking if we have roofing that could possibly be getting old. “Yes we do. Actually, I need to replace some of it.” I reply. This may be good. “That’s great. We do all kinds of roofs for very large commercial clients. Do you have tar and membrane or another type?” This may not be good. Me: “We have lots of different types, pretty much all of them except shingle, I think…” “Wonderful, we would certainly be a great fit for you. How many square feet is it? And is it one or, maybe, two stories?” By this time, I am certain where this is going but I still play the last hand. “We have about 3 million square feet on 10 or so different pitches ranging from one story to 16.” Long pause. “I’m sorry, I don’t think we do anything like that. Thank you for your time.” Click.

To answer the question, it is real obvious to me, working and sometimes living in a plant day-in and day-out, when someone doesn’t have a clue about us but doesn’t want to let on the fact. I don’t expect a salesman to know any detail, but jumping in with how you can certainly help us and are such a great fit when I know you don’t know anything about us is an immediate turn off. “Commercial clients” worries me. A plant isn’t a mall, isn’t a farm, isn’t a house, etc. Either know the basics about who you are calling or, if you don’t, admit it. I applaud them for asking questions but they have to ask the questions to learn rather than presuming. Next, “One, maybe two stories.” Dead give-away. They are fishing in the wrong pond. They may have the best intentions and may be a great company and I may even really need a good contractor. But, for me, I don’t have time for the conversation because it is like talking to a car mechanic when I need a jet engine repaired.

Instead. Ask a question or two. “I’m Eric, calling from ACME Roofing Company and we do roofing work for businesses. Would you mind telling me a little about your buildings and any roofing needs you may have in the next year or two to see if we could help you out with a quote?” From here I can describe my needs and no time is wasted. If you can help, great. If you can’t help, the salesman can take it to the graduate level and say “That sounds like an amazing facility and it is much more than we are able to bite off at this time but I really appreciate you telling me about it. If I come across anyone who could possibly help with your needs, would it be ok for me to pass on your contact information?” That tells me the salesman wants to help me even if he can’t personally help me – and that goes a long way. Next year maybe I have a roofing project on a smaller, side building, and I am going to pull out that contact and call him. Real Jedi Master sales is when that salesman reaches out and finds a contractor who can help me. I will tell everyone I know about the great company that really helped me out. That one sales call followed by passing on a contact resulted in me personally recommending the roofing company to friends without any more work by the salesman. Great payback especially when you consider that a personal recommendation is the highest success type. And, before you scoff, yes, I have done this more than once.

Scenario #2 – Lets talk about me

A sales rep gets past all the road blocks I have put up and makes it into my office. My gate keeper warns me that he has been pushy and will only talk with a person who makes decisions. Strike 1. He sits down and gives me a card which I dismissively toss on my desk without looking at. He starts, “Thank you for making time to see me today, I know your time is valuable so I will only take a couple minutes.” And then strike two… “I represent a company that has been around for 60 years. Our founder, Rodney, started making widgets in his garage in Dayton in 1950 and then moved into…” etc. and etc. By this time I am thinking of all the things I am not doing right now that have to be done by the end of the day. “…and that’s what we can do for you.” 10 minutes, not two. I can’t resist – and I am sleep deprived because I was at work solving problems at 4am so I say, “I’m sorry, what, exactly is it you can do for me, again?” His response, “Well, we have 70 years of making quality widgets…” Strike 3, Out! “Ok, thank you. Can you leave a product card or something, I have another meeting to get to.” Translation: I guess I could look at a spreadsheet due in three weeks that really isn’t necessary yet but that is kind of like a meeting, right?

What to learn. First things first. Always, always, always, always, always be nicer than you can possibly be to the person at the front desk, front gate, reception desk, janitor, person emptying the trash as you walk in, etc. Your visit is over before it starts if you aren’t. And yes, we know. Second, you don’t value my time if you start by telling me about you for 10 minutes when I gave you two. I have 1001 problems that need to be solved right now and the person who really cares about me is the one who can solve my problems as quickly as possible with as little from me as possible. Lastly, and similar to Scenario #1, you haven’t asked about what I need solved or how you do that. I don’t have any desire to get an additional certificate in mind-reading to determine what part of your company history can solve which of my many problems. Ask if we have what you are selling, ask what I need help with, and then tell me how you can possibly help me.

Instead. “Hi, my name is Eric and I represent ACME Widget Company. We have been helping manufacturers for 50 years and I would love to tell you about our great company sometime but, to be respectful of your time, do you use any widgets here? Tell me about the application.” “Is there anything you are having problems with that I could try to help you out with?” If I have widgets, I have problems with them and now you have started solving my problems. There are a lot of ways to go with this one but I think you get the idea. Learn about the application. You save everyone time when you ask for information to see if you can help before you get any further - then ask if there is any way you can help. My most valuable assets are time and expertise. If you give me one, we are friends. If you give me both, we have a deal.

Scenario #3 – The classic “Get them to say yes”

The phone rings right before lunch or at the end of the day. “Are you the one that makes decisions on purchasing?” Uggg, not again. “Yes.” “Great, does your company use toilet paper?” My though, no, that isn’t allowed here. I say, “Yes.” Almost too quickly I hear “I thought so. Are you looking to save money on your paper supplies?” I can barely resist saying we actually use money for toilet paper so it’s a win-win. “Probably” is all I say. “We have a special right now where you can buy toilet paper for 5 cents per roll. Does that sound like a good deal?” A little too good. “I guess.” Here it comes. “So, should I go ahead and place your first order of toilet paper and paper towels, you use those too, right?” Wait, what? Paper towels? “No.” “But you already said it would save you money; and with costs going up, aren’t you always looking for a great way to cut costs? What other paper products do you use?” Now I just want to toy with them. “We use lots of paper bags and packing paper, do you carry those?” “Yes. This is great! It sounds like we could really save you a lot of money. Let’s get that first order coming.” And I drop the hammer. “Oh, you want to order from me? Sorry, I don’t do that. I only order repair parts. I don’t know who orders the paper products.” Dejected click. I giggle.

I know I am mean but, really, does this ever work? The first sentence may sound like a question starting with “Are you the one…” but the message it conveys is “I have a script to read, you are my 5036th call in the last hour, I am not even listening to what you say and I don’t care but I am getting paid just to get you to say yes.” Nowhere is there any indication that the human on the other end of the slightly tinny connection with the unmistakable background din of many people reading the same script is remotely interested in the fact that they are talking to another human. Next, you aren’t talking to the right person. I don’t care about the TP supply unless it’s out – let along who orders it. But you don’t know that because you are more interested in getting “Yes” than actually getting information. You can’t sell unless someone needs what you are selling. And you won’t know that if you are only fishing to hear ‘yes.’

I know that cold calling sucks. I also know most of the companies that do this don’t want any personality or thinking and you need the job. But, a little humanity goes a long way. “Hi, my name is Eric, how are you today?” We are both human doing a job. “Do you have two minutes to talk about something no one thinks about but will stop your operation if you don’t have it?” Then, be honest and up front. “We sell paper products. I know, not very exciting but important, am I right?” A little folksy, I know, but human. “I talk to a lot of people in this line of work and in less than 2 minutes, I can tell you about pretty good deal. Are you the one who orders these products?” I am much more inclined to give this person some information or talk a little longer.

These are the first three types of calls that came to my mind when I knew almost immediately if I wasn't going to buy. I tried to give you a window into my thoughts in each situation and I’m sure a real sales guru will cut some holes in my recommended dialogue – like I said, I am not at all a sales guy. But I think the concepts are sound. They are what worked on me. 

Also, you, people in sales, can make the change. The incident that was the basis for scenario #2 was bad but he was persistent. I put him off for months after that. I had multiple layers of defense to keep him out but maybe a year later, he finally made it back through. This time, totally different. We talked. He had changed companies, remembered something I had told him in our last meeting, and thought his new company had an innovative solution. Turned out it didn’t work in our application but it was a nice technology. He stopped by for 5-10 minutes every few months over the year or so just to check in but I still couldn’t use his products. Fast forward. I changed jobs and states and had a tough problem that no one could solve. I remembered his innovative solution, called him, bought one, and he became the sole supplier. That worked because, after the first debacle, he wasn’t trying to sell me. What he was trying to do was help me as one guy with a job to another. Sometimes it is that simple.

What do you think? Do my observations have merit? Like I said, I am not in sales. Maybe I am all washed up. I would love to hear from other non-sales types and sales-types about these ideas.

I also love the idea of getting people from outside of your industry to offer advice. Would anyone be interested other topics/job fields?

And, if you are a content creator out there, I welcome feedback. Give me the good, the bad and the ugly.