How do you handle One-sided friendships or relationships?

Have you ever found yourself in a friendship or relationship where you feel like you're giving your all, but receiving nothing in return?

I don't know about you, but I struggle with people who portray parasitic traits. We are often advised to give without expecting anything in return, but isn’t mutual effort the point of any relationship?

A one-sided friendship or relationship occurs when one person consistently invests more time, effort, and emotional energy than the other. This creates an environment where one person feels drained, unappreciated, or taken for granted.

How do you know you are in a one-sided relationship

Recognizing a one-sided relationship can be tricky, especially if you're emotionally invested. You are very likely to become protective whenever someone points it out.

Some common signs include feeling like you’re the only one initiating contact(Texting first, calling first), making plans, or offering emotional support. If you find yourself constantly giving without receiving much in return, it may be time to assess the balance in your relationship.

What Causes One-Sided Relationships

• Different Expectations - Often, one-sided relationships originate from mismatched expectations. One person may view the relationship as more important or require more emotional support, leading to an imbalance in effort.
• Lack of Communication - Communication is key in any relationship. When it’s lacking or inadequate, misunderstandings arise, and one person may feel neglected or undervalued. Do not confuse talking with communication. You can be talking all the time but still not understand each other due to poor listening.
• Emotional Unavailability - Sometimes, a person may be emotionally unavailable due to past trauma, personal struggles, or simply being overwhelmed. This can lead to one partner or friend feeling unsupported. In such a case, dont be quick to judge. Give your partner space and if you have to ask about the problem, be intentional and be ready to listen without any judgement. If that does not work, it is time to pack your things and leave.
• Selfishness or Narcissism - In some cases, one person may be more focused on their own needs and desires, leaving little room for considering the other person’s feelings. This can create a parasitic dynamic where one person is constantly taking without giving back. Stay alert and get out such realtionships as soon as you can.

Narcissists have a way of making you stay even in suffering.

What are the effects of One-Sided Relationships

This kind of relationship can have a negative impact on your mental health. These are some of the common effects:

• Feelings of Neglect

Being in a one-sided relationship can lead to feelings of neglect. You might feel like your efforts aren’t appreciated or that your needs are being ignored. This can in turn affect your mood, mental, and even physical health.

• Low Self-Esteem

Over time, the lack of reciprocation can affect your self-esteem. You may begin to question your worth and wonder if you’re asking for too much. This can make you miserable and further subject you to abuse or mistreatment.

• Resentment and Anger

As the imbalance continues, it’s common to develop feelings of resentment and anger. You might feel frustrated that your efforts aren’t being recognized or reciprocated, leading to tension in the relationship.

Why do we stay in One-Sided Relationships

• Fear of Loneliness

This is something most people can relate with. The fear of being alone can keep people in one-sided relationships. They may believe that any relationship is better than none, leading them to tolerate imbalances. It is important to learn to be alone. This will help you avoid getting into relationships for things you can handle by yourself.

• Hoping your partner will Change

We have all at some point ignored a bad trait in someone we fancied with teh hope that they will change, haven't we?

We stay in one-sided relationships hoping that things will eventually change. We hold onto the belief that our partner or friend will start reciprocating our efforts.

• Low Self-Worth

Low self-worth can also play a significant role. If someone doesn’t believe they deserve better, they might stay in a relationship where they’re not being valued. Look at yourself for instance, how good is your sense of self-worth.

Do you believe you deserve the good things or are doubtful? Low self-worth can lead you into accepting the bare minimum and tolerating disrespect and mistreatment.

How to deal with a One-Sided Relationship

• Communicate Your Feelings

Open communication is important. Talk to the other person about how you’re feeling. They might not be aware of the imbalance and may be willing to make changes. If that does not work, which is very likely, walk out. They are probably not interested in your complaints.

• Be clear what you want from the start

Some of us just jump into relationships without mentioning their expectations. We then end up disappointed when none of them is met.

Setting boundaries is essential in any relationship. Make it clear what you need and what you’re no longer willing to tolerate. This can help create a more balanced relationship.

• Think about the Relationship’s Worth

Take time to evaluate whether the relationship is worth maintaining. If the other person isn’t willing to put in the effort, it might be time to reconsider your involvement. This might sound inconsiderate but it isn’t. Your mental wellness should be more important.

Have NO guilt for saying ENOUGH. They never cared to fix things in the first place.

QUESTION: How do you deal with one-sided relationships