How do we nurture patience in young people?

While patience is said to be a virtue, it's also a skill that can be developed and honed over time. In today

In today's fast-paced world, where instant gratification is often the norm for many of us, cultivating patience within ourselves can seem like an elusive task, and what about the younger people in our life?

Learning the skill of patience sets a foundation for resilience, emotional regulation, and perseverance.

And the good news is that with dedication and practice, anyone can become more patient.

These practical strategies could help you build more patience skills, boosting your own wellbeing as you nurture this invaluable trait in the younger people in your life.

1. Lead by Example

The first key in helping anyone else build patience is to practise it yourself. Children and young people learn by observing the behavior of those around them, so as an adult, our actions speak much louder than our words.

If we can model patience in our daily interactions, whether it's waiting calmly in line or in traffic, handling setbacks with grace, or practising active listening during conversations, then the younger people in our lives will mirror this behavior. We must be mindful of how we demonstrate patience in our own lives.

And if we know we haven't displayed patience, we can own it and speak to up about it. 'I wasn't being very patient then. I am working on that. Next time I'll wait until you finish speaking before I jump in', and then we need to follow through.

2. Remember that children are children

Children, especially younger ones, have limited attention spans and impulse control which is all part of their development.

It's important to set expectations for patience-building based on the child's age and developmental stage. Break tasks into smaller, achievable steps, and offer praise and encouragement along the way.

By setting small and achievable goals, you can help children experience the satisfaction of accomplishment and build patience through incremental progress. If they are small, start small.

3. Practise Mindfulness Together

Introduce mindfulness practices into your family routine to cultivate patience and emotional awareness. Take a few minutes each day to engage in simple mindfulness exercises like deep breathing or mindful eating.

Remember you are practising mindfulness whenever you are paying attention to the present moment without judging it. Encourage young people to pay attention to their thoughts and emotions without judgement. This will help them develop self-regulation skills and become more patient in challenging situations.

4. Acknowledge and praise often

Acknowledge and praise any child's efforts to wait patiently or exhibit self-control, even if it was only for a short time. Offer specific praise such as, "I noticed how calmly you waited for your turn," or "You did a great job staying patient while we finished at the shops." Celebrating small victories reinforces positive behavior and encourages children to continue practising patience and making progress with this important skill.

5. Work to promote a calm environment

A calm and structured environment supports the development of patience in young people. Establish predictable routines and clear expectations to reduce stress and anxiety. Minimize distractions and create designated spaces for focused activities, like a calm corner.

Relaxation techniques like deep breathing or progressive muscle relaxation can help you and them manage frustration and stay patient in challenging situations. (There are some great ideas for families in the [free to join] PLS Family Link .)

6. Foster Empathy and Understanding

Help develop empathy by encouraging young people to consider the feelings and perspectives of others. Talk about emotions and how they are all valid and how different people may react differently in various situations.

Teach empathy through storytelling, role-playing, and discussing real-life scenarios. When children understand the impact of their actions on others, they're more likely to exercise patience and kindness.

7. Practise Patience-Building Activities

Engaging children in activities that promote patience and delayed gratification like puzzles, board games, and arts and crafts projects. These require concentration and perseverance.

Encourage them to set goals, plan strategies, and work through challenges independently. These activities not only strengthen patience but also foster problem-solving skills and creativity.

Patience is a valuable skill that lays the groundwork for success and happiness in life.

As parents and caregivers and leaders, we play a crucial role in nurturing this essential trait in the young people in our lives.

By modeling patience, setting expectations that fit, practising mindfulness, creating a calm environment, fostering empathy, and engaging in patience-building activities, with lots of encouragement and with repetition and practice, we can all help young people develop the patience they need to navigate life's challenges with resilience and grace.

Remember, patience is not built overnight—it's a journey of growth and learning that unfolds over time, for all of us.

Until next time,

Jo Devin

Proud co-founder of the Positive Living Skills initiative in Australia, supporting early learning and primary school educational communities to deliver preventative mental health education. For more information, visit https://www.positivelivingskills.com.au/