How do we navigate these times together?

Hi folks. *For those who are on the ALG email list, you will have received this last week. It has been hard to find the space to write. There are no words for the situation that continues to unfold in Israel and Gaza. As a community (all of you reading this are included), we may be feeling a messy mix. We may feel overwhelmed, scared, feeling guilty for being safe while others are not, angry and maybe, lost.

As a progressive feminist Jewish woman in Canada I am feeling lost. There seems to be little space in public for the complexity I am negotiating in my identities, in progressive spaces or in some spaces within my own community. I know that I am not alone. Some days, it feels like being spoken for, other days, spoken at, and then spoken through again and again.

My heart is with all the Palestinians and Israelis at this moment, that continue to face unspeakable pain, and Muslims and Jews within my community whom I know are feeling the horrible ripple effects of this moment. My heart is also with you, reading this, who may be struggling.

I have reflected on what feels helpful and hopeful to share, let alone safe.

ALG's work has always involved facilitation, bridge building, helping folks interact in human-centred ways, and deep reflection. So today, I share tools from the ALG ?4 Rs approach to help engage with each other in a way that respects our humanity. This applies to us as individuals, leaders, and in the context of workplaces, that may be feeling this polarization. We use this approach in many of our trainings, for example, on Building a Culture of Respect.

Regulate: This is about taking stock of how you are feeling. Take 2 minutes to take stock. You can use different questions to get there, for example, what am I feeling in my body? Tension? Pain? Discomfort? Difficulty breathing? Where am I feeling it? Is it in my shoulders? My back etc.?

Then ask yourself, what is one thing I can do that could help me feel 5% more relaxed? It could be as simple as remembering to breath (you'd be surprised how much I have forgotten this). It could be taking a break from the phone. One simple technique is box breathing. It might be as simple as noticing what you feel without needing to make it better.

?Recognize: This is about taking stock of the context.

For example asking yourself:

-Intentions and Goals: What are my intentions and goals for engaging? What do I hope to achieve?

-Relationship: What is my relationship with this person/people I am engaging with? Do I want to be in community with them?

-Power Dynamics: What are the power dynamics between me and the person/people with whom I am engaging?

-Safety: Am I safe physically? Emotionally?

When considering how we may wish to engage around the Israel-Palestine conflict, as individuals, and even as colleagues, here are pause and reflect questions to consider, inspired by Liz Sohyeon Kleinrock:

-What do I think I know about Israel-Palestine and the groups involved?

-How might my own lens, including frameworks and life experiences shape how I and others view this conflict? Where could it be helpful to expand my lens?

-Who do you care about in your life? How might they be impacted by what is happening?

-What do you notice about how people discuss the conflict? What barriers seem to prevent people from communicating effectively?

-How might a post or public statement help? How might it be less helpful, to you, to those you care about, or those impacted by the conflict? What are other ways you can be helpful or make an impact?

?Respond: Once we have taken stock of our nervous system and the context, we are in a better position to respond, rather than react.

Responding doesn't look the same for everyone. Sometimes the urgency to do something can feel overwhelming, and we react to feel like we are "doing something". Responding on social media is one way to respond, however, there are other ways to make an impact.

The past few weeks I have focused on connecting with folks I care about and community - of many faiths and backgrounds, regulating my nervous system, learning about the conflict, while reducing input from social media. This is doing something.

Talking to our families and colleagues about Islamophobia and Antisemitism is doing something.

Learning and educating on history is doing something.

Writing is doing something.

Having a nourishing conversation with a friend is doing something.

These are micro actions that can feed into the macro, and make an impact. These are also actions that sustain those of us working for a more just world so that we can engage better over the long term.

?Reflect: This is about taking stock of how an interaction went. For example, what worked? What might you want to try next time? This is also a time to give yourself compassion; many of us are not sure what we are feeling or how to respond. Every interaction is a learning process.

What tools are helping you feel less lost during these dark times? What strategies are helping you regulate?

Please reach out to ALG if your team could use support through our workshops, including Building a Culture of Respect, Individual and Collective Well-being or other services. Of note is a co-created Respect in the Workplace Learning Snippets program that offers broad coverage of important anti-harassment topics for the workplace that your team may benefit from.

We are also piloting a trauma-informed inclusive practices workshop. Please reach out if this is something your team could benefit from.

Below are resources from ALG to help individuals, as well as organizations create safer conditions to navigate these conversations.

Workshop & services updates

• ALG collaborated with UN Women Georgia and Human Resources Professional Association ? Georgia on a new DEI manual and certification program for HR professionals in gender responsive and DEI workplace practices. The manual we have been working on will be will be coming out shortly, stay tuned!
• ALG was honoured to be at HEC Montreal business school to deliver an educational podcast on building cultures of respect in French, coming out soon.
• We were delighted to train public sector leaders on building cultures of respect and belonging with our microlearning partner, Dialectic.
• I gave an introduction to preventing sexual exploitation and abuse training with Digna, the Canadian Centre of Expertise on the Prevention of Sexual Exploitation and Abuse yesterday and coming up on November 16, I deliver the training on PSEA Reporting Mechanisms Sign up here.

Resources for this moment

ALG resources

• Article with tips on building trauma-informed teams and conversations: The Trauma-Informed Future of Work
• ALG's article Building Inclusive Well-being at Work (more relevant now than ever).

Resources from others

• A lot of things are true. Queer feminist rabbi, Danya Ruttenberg acknowledges the breadth of trauma involved and the structural inequalities in this conflict. She pushes us to imagine, to root for, everyone's liberation.
• Feminuity resources: Antisemitism, Diversity, Equity and Inclusion and Addressing Anti-Muslim Sentiment, Islamophobia, and Anti-Islamism at Work
• Support the voices calling for peace, and lift up the leadership of Palestinian and Israeli women who have been organizing for peace for decades:Standing Together Women Wage PeaceAlliance for Middle East Peace

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Until we meet again, take care of yourself, and others,

Adriana and the ALG Consulting team