How do become a delusional leader (OR How to be always right)..in 6 easy steps

Have you had a delusional leader? Who is always right?

Who calls the entire team in, starts story telling, conveying perspectives and decisions left, right and center with complete conviction. And everybody except him is wondering "Is he even in touch with reality? And when can we go back to our desks?"

(Could be a woman too. I am a believer in gender equality.)

There is a lot of stuff out there on how to become a great/authentic/ vulnerable/compassionate and many other kinds of leaders. But many of us often end up becoming delusional leaders anyway.

So instead of relying on accidental luck for such a popular type, I thought of writing down steps to become a delusional leader. You can start very early in your career. The best part is, you might already have - but not know it!

This can be very helpful in your personal life too. To be always right. Just replace "juniors, peers, seniors" with your "children/younger siblings, spouse, parents/elders" in the steps below.

1. Decide who you are: How you are already authentic, empathetic, sensitive, kind, helpful, self-aware, have high EQ etc. Choose whatever you want. Don't let the truth limit you. Be creative!

2. Come up with some story to justify each quality to to others, and more importantly to yourself. eg. "I have always been great at non-verbal communication!! I was playing dumb charades when I was 6 years old. And I communicated in 30 seconds!", "My uncle's wife's friend's teacher once appreciated me for how perceptive I was!" Keep repeating these stories as many times as possible. To yourself too.

3. Provide stories instead of solutions: If team members come to you with problems, offer a random solution but support it with a story "Do this. Because I had a similar challenge in my earlier organization, and doing this improved revenue by 150% and people erected a temple in my honor"

If they bring up constraints, that's another opportunity to motivate with story..."Who says it's not possible? When I was in ABC company, we had to deliver a baby in 1 month and I was called to the rescue and then we ... "

In case you have not heard it yet, humans love stories.

4. Cut off feedback(short term): This is critical. Because there will be times when people point out facts that are not in sync with your story. The following steps will protect your story from any person who challenges it:

• For juniors, use authority eg. "You junior! What do you know?!!"
• For peers, discredit them eg. "You are telling ME? Have you seen yourself? You think you are perfect?!" or "Who are you to tell me? Easier said than done"
• For seniors, use a combination of discrediting them during cribbing-sessions with peers("She tells ME I have to own things. Has she seen herself?!"), and victim-playing eg. "He can never see and appreciate me! Nothing is enough!" Repeat stories from point #2 to gain sympathy.

5. Cut off feedback(long term) Use above techniques consistently, until people who really care stop giving feedback. And the rest give feedback that always agrees with your stories.

6. Emergency tactic: Some people care too much and can be a real pain. They invest time in showing you the mirror, even if you use all your tactics to push them away and insult them. If you find yourself forced to a corner, admit your fault/apologize/yell and do whatever it takes to shut them up for the time being. But you can get back at them later...

Keep track of their mistakes. Trust me, it is easy to see something if that's the only thing you are looking for. Once you gather enough evidence in a few weeks, you can say "See what you do? And you had the gall to tell me?!" 

That's it. As you can see, it is simply about creating the best version about yourself and cutting off all feedback to the contrary.

You might end up alone, but you will be right. If that happens, a handy story for is "It is always lonely at the top" or "People are always jealous of successful people"

If you are lucky, you will end up with a lot of people who don't care, but agree with you. Because you agree with them. Especially as you get closer to the top. You might not accomplish a lot collectively, but you will surely convince each other that it was somebody else's fault. And you were right.

If you have come across more techniques to be a delusional leader, please put them in the comments and help the community

#Mondaylaugh #leadership #selfawareness #psychology

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About me

I gave up a corporate tech career to pursue my love and passion: Helping organisations solve business problems from a behavioral lens. To create better leaders and teams - using psychology and technology. Am a partner at ODA, and OD consulting firm. Am the COO at Orglens, helping organizations map their informal networks. I also do 6-hour intensives for deep self-awareness called "Understanding yourself" . Contact me at [email protected]

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