How Disney+ Helped Me "Assume the Best"

My wife and I have had several movie nights with our two little boys in the past month.

We've started jumping back to simpler times, watching classics like

?? Mary Poppins

?? Bedknobs and Broomsticks

?? Peter Pan

?? Bambi

Thanks, Disney+.

We thought our rambunctious boys might be bored with long, live action musicals and slow, quiet cartoons; they're used to the explosive, over-stimulating shows of today.

Instead, each night, they were engaged the entire time, loving the incredible music and relatively slow pace of these classics from our childhood.

Am I a big fan of screen time? Not particularly. My thoughts below are by no means a totally perfect or happy analogy; my parenting goals do not include implanting an unhealthy obsession with old movies and TV shows in my boys (though there are probably worse things).

But I have absolutely loved how this series of little experiences has helped me come to see my sons and their attention spans and capabilities differently ("WHAT?!? They CAN sit still for more than 7 seconds at a time, even when there's no yelling or excitement or bright colors on a TV screen?").

How often do I assume too little of those around me, outside of this parenting context?

I have a tendency toward both micromanagement and not delegating or asking for help nearly often enough.

I tell myself it's not because I don't trust others to do a job well. I tell myself it's just that I think they'll really appreciate the extra help; or I don't want to overburden them by throwing another thing on their plate; or I don't think they'll be really interested in the work; or some other noble-ish justification.

The reality? My poor management decisions usually come down to unfounded assumptions I've made about someone's capability. A coworker or fellow volunteer who misses a meeting can easily become (at least in my head, and I assume in yours as well) someone who does not seem passionate or engaged enough to involve in planning or implementing a significant project.

On the opposite end of the spectrum are most of the gifted leaders I have been blessed to work with throughout my career thus far. If anything, they have far overestimated my abilities! They assumed I was capable of great things, even sometimes without having any real reason to do so. And the experiences coming from those assumptions have usually resulted in incredible growth, progress, and success.

One of my former employer BambooHR's core values is "Assume the Best."

This is usually talked about in relation to conflict resolution - assuming that another person or group that you are frustrated with actually has good intentions and is not just trying to ruin your life or project.

But I want to start thinking of it in an additional context -- assuming the best in my evaluation of the capabilities of other people. I want to follow the example of my leaders and become more willing to give responsibility and opportunity to those around me, even if they are unproven; then stand back to watch greatness show itself.

If it doesn't pan out that well, it becomes a coaching opportunity and a valuable learning experience all around.

But if it does, I gain a connection and resource I can rely on who has been revealed as a talented fill-in-the-blank. One that I might never have known about, without having given them an opportunity that I could have assumed they wouldn't be capable of handling "right."

I don't all of a sudden think my two young boys are destined for greatness based on their enjoyment of movies that I thought would bore them. But I am going to do my best to assume that there IS greatness in them, and give them opportunities to develop and demonstrate their capabilities. I don't want to delay or stunt their growth by assuming that they are not yet capable of or interested in riding a bike; in mowing the lawn; in painting a fence; in beginning to manage some of their own money; or in anything else that I am afraid they might not do "right."

In the same way, I need to stop underestimating or assuming less than the best of the people around me - coworkers, family members, fellow church volunteers, and others. The potential payoff, for both of us, is incredible.

Who are you underestimating in your life or work right now? Who should you be assuming the best of and giving greater opportunities or responsibility, or simply treating with greater respect and appreciation for their strengths and gifts?