How to deal with What-ifs?

How to deal with What-ifs?

I think we all at least once were bothered with What-if...

  • …I don’t get the job? I lose the competition?
  • …he/she thinks I am not good enough?
  • …I don’t get chosen for the promotion?
  • …it doesn’t work out for me?

In everyday life we can sometimes find ourselves surrounded by what-ifs and self-doubt and if we’re not careful they can take over our mind.

What are what-ifs?

What-ifs are normal, and it is just your brain’s way of protecting you from potential threats that might be ahead. So, there’s nothing wrong or bad about having a What-If. But you need to be careful as What-Ifs can take over and make us overly anxious and worried.

So here is how you can deal with What-ifs:

  1. Write them down - First step is being aware and you can do this by writing them down. This will help you get an idea of not only how many What-Ifs you have, but what they are about too.
  2. Take a step back – I have often noticed that it is easier to help a friend with a problem than help myself with the same one. When we take a step back, we can see things clearly.
  3. Put them into perspective – they are just a thought and may not necessarily be your thoughts.
  4. Reframe them and make them useful – Our what-ifs are usually not as bad as we think or believe they will be.
  5. Believe in yourself – you will come out the other end and get through it. For example, I went for a job interview once and was so worried about the “what-if” I didn’t get the job. And I didn’t, but two weeks later I got a better job! If this was not the case, and l was turned down for the job, I would still walk away knowing I tried my best and I will keep putting myself out there and work hard to find another one.
  6. In and out of control - Is your what-if something you can control? If you can, what can you do about it? For example, “What if I submit this report in the wrong format?” Ask yourself if this is something you can prevent and if so, how can you do it?

We will never escape the What-Ifs but we can learn to accept them. Let me know which of these are most helpful to you!
Katalin Nieuwoudt

MBA, Safety Systems, Safety Investigations at Etihad Airways

3 年

Point 2,3 & 5 are my favorites to use. What-If’s always will be there. Being strong and seeing the positive side helps and not to be moved if your first choice didn’t go through. Every experience is trying to teach us something just make sure you learn the lessons. Sometime we want something so bad just to realize after years that by not getting it we were protected.

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