How To Deal With a Put-Down: the 4 steps.

Way back on the 15th of July 2016, I posted a blog on my website about The Put-Down Merchant which is one of my '52 types of people who are poorly behaved and at times downright difficult'. 

Anyway, what I also did was produce a short video outlining one of the top strategies you can consider using for responding to a put-down. The video is below.

Now please, let's remember this: another one of my 'top strategies' is to do nothing. That's right. It's to hold your tongue. It's to rise above it and move on. It's to not waste your valuable time dealing with rudeness. And to not dignify the remark with a response.

Anyway, here's both a brief overview of the special strategy and the original video. If you'd like to know more, please don't hesitate to contact me - here on LinkedIn or via my website contact page.

The special strategy comes in 4 steps.

1. You tell the person: “What you just said.” or “When you said ……..”

<<That is, you let them know what you’re talking about but just by using the FACTS.>>

2. You tell them: "It seemed like (a put-down, it was designed to hurt, you were having a dig at me, you were trying to embarrass me, etc)".

<<That is, you let them know you’re onto them.>>

3. You then ask them: “Have I interpreted your comments correctly?”, “Was that what you were trying to do?”, etc.

<<That is, you put them on the spot but without putting them down. You are assertive yet tactful.>>

4. No matter what their answer is (for example, ‘Yes, they were having a go at you.’, ‘No they think you’re just being over sensitive.’, ‘They complain: How could you possibly think such a thing?’, ‘They say you just can’t take a joke.’ etc), you tell them it felt like a put-down and you want them to not say such things in the future.

<<That is, you assertively yet diplomatically tell them you didn’t like what they said and how it felt and you want them to refrain from making such comments in the future. And more importantly perhaps, you don't buy into their response.>>

If you like to have a chat about the strategy, or any other aspect of how to deal with difficult people, just follow this link and choose a date and time for me to call you.

And here's the video.

If you'd like the list of top strategies, just follow this link.

Cheers,

Mark.