How to Deal with the Jerk!
Sonia McDonald
CEO & Founder @ LeadershipHQ - Future, Emerging & Women Leadership Experts | Global Keynote Speaker | Award-Winning Author | Extraordinary Leaders & Executive Coach | Leadership Advisor
Have you worked with a Jerk? I have! They are real. They are out there. We have worked with them, for them and lead them. For whatever reason provenance has deemed necessary, there will often be that one person in a working environment that no amount of coaching or compassion will breach. These narcissistic jerks cause disruption, anxiety, pressure, and even hostile work environments no matter what others may do to try and alleviate their control issues.
If you have someone in your work arena that fits this description, don’t panic. There are steps you can take to ensure a smoother, though not ideal, working relationship that gets the results you need. It simply is a matter of recognising that not all workmates are created equal, and this one just needs to be handled in a more demanding way. It’s not about YOU, it's about them, remember this. And only you hold the power over your thoughts and actions.
Be aware of your confidence
One tactic workplace jerks take on to forward their own narcissism is to bully other employees into discrediting their own work. You are the expert in the field and recognise your work has great value and substance, so when the workplace jerk starts knocking it down, realise you have more fruitful avenues for peer review. Seek out those around you who you trust and garner their opinion. Often times you will discover the negative critiques were simply that – negative.
Keep communications open
It is often uncomfortable to discuss just about anything with a demanding jerk in the workplace, but shutting down lines of communication is not the answer. When having to collaborate with such as personality, speak clearly and concisely about your topic. Be aware that a narcissist needs to feel in control, and that they may well try to drive the communication into a light that makes them look better. This is done by introducing red herrings into the conversation – don’t fall prey to dead end roads. Stick to the point at hand and move along.
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Don’t just take it
If the office jerk is offensive, bullying, or entering the realm of harassment, you don’t have to take one for the team and excuse the behaviour. Recognise that their actions affect not only your work environment, but also the business image and fluidity as a whole. Report negative behaviour immediately to a supervisor or the human resources leader for resolution, and understand that this has nothing to do with anything you have done. Negative personalities such as the workplace jerk reduce productivity and job satisfaction, and making others aware of the disruption to business will ensure actions are taken immediately to correct the situation. Here are some more great tips from Balance Careers too.
Do you have any tips that you could share?
The Author - Sonia McDonald
Sonia McDonald believes we should lead with kindness, from the heart, doing rather than telling and is known for her mantra ‘Just lead’. She leads by example in all these areas and through her one on one practical coaching, leadership training for teams and organisations encourages others to do the same. Sonia has helped hundreds of people on their leadership journey to become the best version of themselves and in turn inspire and bring out the best in others.
For more than 25 years, Sonia has been on the front lines of human resource management. She has held leadership positions around the globe and through experience, research and study come to realise what it takes to be a truly effective leader.
Sonia has an ability to speak bravely and authentically about her own development as a leader, personal and career challenges in a way which resonates with her audience. She is recognised as a LinkedIn influencer and has become an in-demand keynote speaker, who puts people at ease and starts important conversations.
She is an award-winning published author and writes regularly for publications such as The Australian, HRD Magazine, Smart Healthy Women and Women’s Business Media. Sonia has become recognised for her commentary around the topic of leadership, developing work-life balance, championing the up and coming leaders of tomorrow and advocating for women in business and male-dominated industries.
Contact Sonia or her team at LeadershipHQ at https://leadershiphq.com.au/ or https://soniamcdonald.com.au/
Strategic people and performance leader - Driving organisational change, commercial growth and business transformation
5 年Bullies and jerks in the work environment exist for one reason, and one reason only: leadership in the organisation allows it.? If you find a bully or jerk in your team, the problem is not the bully or jerk, the problem lies with team leadership. Bullies and jerks are symptoms of a much bigger problem, and only by addressing and changing leadership in the team, will prevent bully and jerks from emerging.? Good leaders have no problems working with narcissist, egocentric and selfish employees, these sort of people may pose a challenge to a good leader, but under good leadership they never become a problem. It is not easy, but it is simple.?
Mining Consultant
5 年Very negative angle of thought. Human beings are like a hard disk of a computer. An intelligent operator can dig any type of behaviour from his/ her hard disk. If I am not able to get certain behaviour from another person, it will be my weakness. It is wrong to brand a person ‘Stupid’ just because he/she behaved in certain ways in given circumstances.
Senior Advocate and Advisor at JMA Consultancy
5 年Agree Sonia they exist and throw them into the mix with anyone just a little vulnerable to self promoting criticism of a narcissistic personality and you have a recipe for disaster. More awareness of these destructive personality types needs to taken. Mind you the “jerk” as you say is very good at covering their tracks and fooling well meaning leaders. Let’s hope the professions can be alert to this and either call them out and even get them help before harm is done. There is another type as well, the little Aussie bleeder, no not Norman Gunston for those old enough, but the under performer who hides their shortcomings by ‘bleeding’ on anyone’s shoulder who will listen -whether about how hard they have it in life and/or at work. Watch out for these characters, they are just as disruptive and when caught out on performance or ability they throw everyone or anyone under the bus and flee by becoming the victim rather then facing their shortcomings. Emotionally and intellectually mature people accept imperfection and want to learn, these guys or girls won’t put in that effort and take evasive action by blaming everyone else. Ruins workplaces.