How to deal with failure and bounce back stronger.

Last night, 18 of the IT Works crew played a game of footy at our local football pitch.

My team lost.

8-1.

And to top it off, this happened (yes that’s me in the red shorts)

How do you come back from such a battering? I’ll cover it off in today’s blog.

In all seriousness, failure is a natural process of growth. Both personal and professional development. I’m a firm believer if you don’t fail along the way to trying to attain an end goal (pardon the pun), you simply aren’t trying hard enough.

“I can accept failure, everyone fails at something. But I can’t accept not trying.”

- Michael Jordan

First, just accept how you feel.

When you’ve just failed it will most likely hurt. Sometimes a bit. Sometimes a lot. Especially when you have to come into the office the next morning with everyone referencing the absolute abomination that was witnessed.

That’s OK.

Don’t try to push it away by distracting yourself or by trying to push the responsibility onto the rest of the world (if you deep down know that this one’s on you partly or fully).

But to just be with what I’m thinking and feeling. To try to accept it, to let it in and to hurt for a while instead of trying to reject it all and to keep it away.

Seek Out Support

Typically, everyone has a support network, no matter how big or small. Other people might have been where you are right now. Their experience could be of great value to help you move forward. And even if they haven’t gone through what you’re trying to work through, they can still be there to help support you and potentially provide you with some guidance or a fresh outlook that will help you along your journey.

This could give you the momentum you need to break through this temporary setback.

Be constructive and learn from this situation.

See it more as valuable feedback and something you can use to improve rather than only a big blow and setback.

I’ve found that the simplest and most helpful way to do that is to ask myself better questions (instead of the common ones that send you off into a negative spiral).

Change the “why me” into positive language.

“Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement.”

- C. S. Lewis

Burn Your Bridges

For example, I no longer speak to Robert Porter, the individual in question in the video above.

It’s tough to leverage momentum if you’re still living in the past. Unable to let go of better days or focusing on the “what if”. Success is made in the now. The actions which you take now, moving forward, will influence your success in the future.

You must decide that you will burn those bridges and never look back. Instead, you will look forward to the future and do the things that are necessary to ensure you get through this failed attempt successfully the next time around.

Crack on

Move forward. Crack on. And just keep swimming.

You can always top it off with a cold one.

“Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.”

― Nelson Mandela

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