Make Every Customer A Repeat Customer

"The highest compliment is when customers choose to come back." - Sam Horn

It's ironic, isn't it? We're taught calculus in school; we're not taught how to keep our cool - when other people aren't.

We're not taught how to graciously and proactively handle challenging situations in the moment - so we can make every guest a repeat guest.

Want good news? It’s not too late.?

And it's worth it because the White House Office of Consumer Affairs reports that when we effectively handle complaints and problems, customers feel more favorably about us than if nothing had gone wrong in the first place.

From now on if someone's upset and you're not sure what to do, do Tongue Fu?

What is Tongue Fu!??

It's a trademarked communication process that helps on think on our feet so we can handle sensitive situations in the moment vs. thinking of the perfect response on the way home.

Here are a few examples. Hope you find them useful.

Tongue Fu! Tips for Proactive Customer Service Communication

1. "What can I say when people complain?"

When people complain,?don't?explain,?Take the AAA Train. Explaining why something went wrong makes people angrier because they feel we're not being accountable. In fact, explanations often come across as excuses.

Instead,?Agree, Apologize, Act.?"You're right, Mrs. Smith, we were supposed to send that information to you last week, and I'm sorry you didn't receive it yet. If I could please have your email address again, I'll personally send it over right now." Voila. Complaint over!

2. "What can I say if someone accuses me of something that's not true?"

Whatever you do,?don't deny untrue accusations.?If someone says, "You don't care about your customers!" and you protest, "We do too," you've just embroiled yourself in a back-and-forth "Yes we do - No you don't" debate.

Instead ask, "What do you mean?" to find out what's behind the accusation. She may say, "My appointment was a half hour ago, and I'm still waiting." Now you know what's really bothering her. You can apologize for the delay, thank her for her patience, and give her your full attention, instead of arguing with her claim that you don't care about your customers.

3. "What can I say when things go wrong and people start blaming?"

If people are arguing and you try to talk over them, guess what will happen? They'll talk louder. The voice of reason will get drowned out in the commotion.

Instead, put your hand up like a traffic cop or make a T with your hands like a referee. These hand gestures are universal signs to STOP. They will cause a pause, which gives you a chance to get your verbal foot in the door.

Then say these magic words,?"We're here to find solutions, not fault."

Or quote John F. Kennedy who said, "Our task is not to fix the blame for the past, it's to fix the course for the future."

Remind people, "Calling each other names won't help. A better focus of our attention is how to fix this and keep it from happening again."

4. "What can I say if I have to tell someone NO?"

First, see if there's a way to say what you/they CAN do vs. what you/they CAN'T.

Imagine a coworker says, "Can we discuss this project?" Instead of saying, "No we can't because I've got a meeting," say, "Yes we can discuss this project. I'm about to go into a meeting and will be finished at 11. Want to talk then?"

The words "can't because" are like a verbal door slamming in people's face. They cause resentment because they pit us as adversaries.

Reword that to "Sure we can, as soon as" or "Yes we can, right after" to become allies so you're on the same side vs. side-against-side,

For example, turn, "No, you can't talk to Joe, he's not available today," into "Yes, you can talk to Joe. He's traveling today and will be back in the office tomorrow. Want to leave a message or get on his calendar for Wednesday?"

I'll always remember a woman in a Tongue Fu! workshop who raised her hand and said, "I can't wait to use this idea at home." I asked why and she said:

"My kids see me as a 'big meanie' because I'm always telling them NO. 'No, you can't play with your friends because you haven't done your chores. NO, you can't watch TV because you haven't done your homework.'

I will replace that with 'Sure you can play with your friends, as soon as you finish your chores. Yes you can watch TV, right after you finish your homework.'

She added, "Sam, this isn't just word play or semantics. This changes the whole dynamic of our relationship. Instead of seeing me?as the one blocking them from what they want, now they're responsible for getting what they want."

She's right. Words aren't petty, they can change relationships - for good.

When we go first and treat other people respectfully - they're more likely to respond in kind and come back next time.

And isn't that what we want?

To treat people with respect so they choose to continue to do business with us?

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Want more ways to connect with customers (and coworkers)? Check out Sam's new book Talking on Eggshells and LinkedIn Learning course which are used by companies around the world as part of their employee communication training.