How to Deal with Challenging Behaviour at Work and Thrive

We've all been there. Trying hard to get your work done, but someone is making it extremely difficult for you. Maybe they're rude, aggressive, uncooperative, or just plain annoying. Whatever the case, you're feeling frustrated and stressed out.

Maybe you have a coworker who is always negative, a manager who micromanages everything, or a client who is rude and demanding. If so, you are not alone.

Challenging behaviour at work is very common and can have a negative impact on your productivity, morale and even well-being.

But don't worry, there are ways to deal with challenging behaviour at work and turn it into an opportunity for growth and success. We can identify, understand and manage challenging behaviour at work and how to use it as a catalyst for positive change.

There are ways to handle challenging behaviour at work without losing your cool or compromising your professionalism.

What is challenging behaviour at work?

Knowing is half the battle won! Challenging behaviour at work is any behaviour that makes it difficult for you or others to perform your tasks effectively, communicate clearly or maintain good relationships. It can be intentional or unintentional, verbal or non-verbal, active or passive.

More precisely for the workplace, challenging behaviour is any behaviour that interferes with your work performance, productivity, or well-being. It can come from anyone: your boss, your co-workers, your clients, or even yourself.

Some examples of challenging behaviours in the workplace are:

- Aggression: This can include shouting, swearing, threatening or physically harming others.

- Disruptiveness: This can include interrupting others, making noise, distracting others or sabotaging their work.

- Refusal to cooperate: This can include ignoring instructions, rejecting feedback, avoiding responsibilities or withholding information.

- Inappropriate behaviour: This can include making jokes that offend others, gossiping, lying or violating company policies.

- Harassment: This can include bullying, discriminating against others based on their identity (such as race, gender or disability), sexual harassment or stalking.

Some examples of challenging behaviour that you can observe are:

- Interrupting or talking over you

- Ignoring or dismissing your ideas or opinions

- Criticizing or blaming you unfairly

- Making unreasonable demands or expectations

- Being passive-aggressive or sarcastic

- Bullying or harassing you

- Lying or withholding information

- Being disrespectful or rude

Why do people exhibit challenging behaviour at work?

There are many possible reasons why people behave in challenging ways at work. Some of them are:

- Stress: People may feel overwhelmed by their workload, deadlines or personal issues and lash out at others as a way of coping.

- Lack of communication: People may have different expectations, goals or styles of communication and misunderstand each other's intentions or needs.

- Lack of feedback: People may not receive enough recognition, praise or constructive criticism for their work and feel unappreciated, insecure or resentful.

- Lack of motivation: People may not enjoy their work, find it meaningful or see how it contributes to the bigger picture and lose interest, engagement or enthusiasm.

- Lack of respect: People may not respect each other's opinions, values or boundaries and act in rude, arrogant or aggressive ways.

Addition reasons why challenging behaviour happen can be noted at the team level.There are many reasons why people may behave in a challenging way at work. Some of them are:

- Stress: People who are under pressure may lash out at others or act defensively.

- Personality: People who have different styles, values, or preferences may clash with others who don't share them.

- Communication: People who have poor communication skills may misunderstand others or send mixed messages.

- Motivation: People who lack motivation may resist change or avoid responsibility.

- Emotion: People who are feeling angry, sad, insecure, or jealous may project their feelings onto others.

- Power: People who have more power than others may abuse it or use it to manipulate others.

How to deal with challenging behaviour at work?

Dealing with challenging behaviour at work can be tricky but not impossible. The good news is that you don't have to let challenging behaviour ruin your day. Use some effective techniques to cope with it and resolve it in a positive way. Here are some steps you can take:

Step 1: Stay calm and composed. Don't let your emotions get the best of you. Take a deep breath and count to ten before responding. If possible, take a break and walk away from the situation until you feel more relaxed.

Step 2. Identify the problem and the goal. Try to understand what is causing the challenging behaviour and what you want to achieve from the interaction. Is it a misunderstanding? A conflict of interest? A personal issue? What do you need from the other person? What do they need from you?

Step 3. Listen and empathize. Show respect and interest in what the other person has to say. Listen actively and attentively without interrupting or judging them. Try to see things from their perspective and acknowledge their feelings and concerns.

Step 4. Communicate clearly and assertively. Express your thoughts and feelings in a clear and respectful way. Use "I" statements instead of "you" statements to avoid blaming or accusing them. For example: "I feel frustrated when you interrupt me" instead of "You always interrupt me". Be honest and direct about what you want and need from them without being aggressive or passive.

Step 5. Seek solutions and compromise. Don't focus on who is right or wrong; focus on finding a win-win outcome that works for both parties. Brainstorm ideas together and be open-minded and flexible about trying different options. If necessary, agree to disagree respectfully and move on.

Step 6. Follow up and follow through. After resolving the issue, make sure to follow up with the other person to check if everything is going well and if there are any further problems or concerns that need addressing.

Some tips on how to handle challenging behaviour at work effectively?:

- Stay calm: Avoid reacting impulsively, defensively or aggressively as this will only escalate the situation.

- Be respectful: Treat the other person with dignity, courtesy and professionalism. Use polite language, positive body language and active listening skills. Don't judge them harshly, blame them personally or make assumptions about them without evidence.

- Be assertive: Express your feelings, needs and expectations clearly and respectfully. Again, you can remember to use "I" statements instead of "you" statements (for example "I feel frustrated when you interrupt me" instead of "You are so rude"). Set boundaries and limits on what you will accept and what you won't (for example "I appreciate your input but I need some time to finish this task" instead of "Leave me alone"). Don't let yourself be intimidated, manipulated or guilt-tripped by the other person.

- Be empathetic: Try to understand where the other person is coming from and what they are trying to achieve. Put yourself in their shoes and see things from their perspective. Acknowledge their feelings, concerns and challenges without agreeing with them (for example "I understand that you are under a lot of pressure" instead of "You are right"). Show compassion and offer support if appropriate (for example "Is there anything I can do to help?" instead of "That's your problem").

In all, we all know that working with others can be rewarding, fun and inspiring, but sometimes it can also be frustrating, stressful and exhausting. Therefore, you can combat challenging behaviour at work and turn it into an opportunity for growth and improvement.?