How to create YOUR New Normal

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I'm hearing a lot of people say (including myself) that they don't want to go back to the old normal because it never worked.

A question I've been pondering recently is

will we really change?

or will we go back to our previous ways/habits/behaviours? The cynic in me says 'take a look at history', how much did we change after crises in the past? (another conversation!).

We can wait and see what happens, see will society etc change after this crisis (and if we all do that let's see what changes!), or we can take personal leadership (a pet topic of mine) and look back at ourselves and see what we can change and make our contribution that way. This gets my vote!

Marshall Goldsmiths 'Wheel of change' comes to mind. Look it up if you want it explained. Using it, here are four questions I crafted with examples. We could sit down with this weekend over a coffee and write down our answers.

1. The new habit or behaviour that served me well over the lockdown that I want to continue is ____________

e.g. daily walk with partner, time with the kids, family meals, time to talk to neighbours/friends/family, having meetings online that don't need to be in person, regular exercise, time for meditation/reflection, etc.

2. The old habit or behaviour that did not serve me well before lockdown (old normal) that I want to leave behind is ____________

e.g. working too much, not saying NO, worrying about unimportant things (sweating the small crap), not being present, spending too much time on screens, not giving people time, etc.

3. The habit or behaviour that has always served me well before and during lockdown that I want to preserve and nurture is ____________

e.g. being thoughtful, respecting others including my loved ones, following through on my commitments, 

4. The habit or behaviour of others that I struggle with but will decide to accept is  ____________ e.g. not being thanked or praised, people not doing things the way I like or the way I would do it myself, poor management or poor government, getting frustrated/angry, etc.

This is the easy bit! Now you need to start, eliminate, preserve and accept these habits/behaviours. It's time to seek help, unless we find it easy to change habits/behaviours (no one does!).

The two best resources I've found (and I've looked) are.

'Triggers' by Marshall Goldsmith and 'Atomic Habits' by James Clear

Buy the books or audio book now and get help with creating your new normal.

Here's a previous post on the same subject based on what Kahlil Gibran had to say https://www.dhirubhai.net/posts/barrywalshe_do-you-want-to-go-back-to-the-old-normal-activity-6669865062896832512-AJUm

I'd love to get your comments on anything you've read/heard. Please drop a comment below and like or share?

Barry Walsh: Founder of the Power of Seven providing a personal advisory board of peers for ambitious business owners . 20 years experience in helping business owners and their teams develop winning strategies for business growth. Barry’s facilitation style creates a space for shared learning that leads to learning and action. www.po7.ie

Contact me ([email protected]) if you'd like a one page overview of how Po7 groups work and how you can join one?

BARRY Walsh

Founder/MD @ Power of Seven. Surrounding ambitious business owners with a personal advisory board of peers to help make better decisions in business & life.

4 年

Thanks for your question Cosmin. I agree with the argument in the other post you read that says only a few will lead the change. So my question to that is 'what's the difference between those that lead the change and those that want to change but don't?' My answer is strength of 'Desire'. For me it comes down to purpose. If we have a strong sense of purpose we will have a strong wish to serve our purpose, this fuels our desire to change and to lead change. For example, if my purpose is to develop more leaders then I will have a strong wish to do the right thing as opposed to doing things right. This might result in me having a strong desire to change kids education so that they get some leadership training at an early age. This might result in a new schooling system like the Youth Leadership Programme (YLP). When leading change in a group or team the principles are pretty much the same. 1. Collective purpose 2. Strategy to serve this purpose 3. Strong desire to implement the change. The whole topic of change is huge. Just one thing I would highlight - the role 'environment' can play in facilitating (or hindering) change in habits or behaviour. Maybe a topic for another post! or if you or someone else wants comment on this?

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Cosmin Gliga

Helping individuals and teams to achieve their best. I coach. I facilitate. Husband, Father, Beekeeper.

4 年

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and this very useful tool. I saw another post that was arguing that many want a change, only some will change and few will lead a change. What are your toughs on how can change be initiated and sustained despite many craving to return to the “ old ways”.

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BARRY Walsh

Founder/MD @ Power of Seven. Surrounding ambitious business owners with a personal advisory board of peers to help make better decisions in business & life.

4 年

The Wheel of Change

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