How Covid-19 has impacted my Mental Health over the last 3-ish weeks, and why it's important to talk about it.

Over the last three weeks, you could say that my mental health has felt like a rollercoaster—if that rollercoaster was the least-fun rollercoaster in the world. 

There’s no doubt about it, the Coronavirus pandemic has turned our world upside down. Everyone I speak to is struggling to some degree (some worse than others) and I know for certain that I’m not the only one having a tough time with my mental health. Regardless, I wanted to share my story, I believe it is really important to talk about mental health and in writing this I hope that reading it could help someone to open up and share theirs.

So here goes…

Week 1

Week one went like this — denial, then panic & fear, then disbelief. 

Like most companies, this was the week when we started asking “what could this mean for us?” and “what could this mean for our clients?” and we also started asking ourselves “what does this mean for me personally?’ From there, as a business we were really pro-active (with huge credit to my Operations Director, Stephen Weir) and assessed our current set-up (servers, projects, our internal wiki etc) to build the foundations for a plan. 

Within two days, we split our team into three groups: Team one worked in the studio for two weeks, team two switched with them for two weeks and team three were set to work from home indefinitely (this group included those who are either vulnerable to the virus or live with people who are vulnerable to the virus.) This approach felt right at the time and our team members were given the option to choose what felt most comfortable to them.

By Friday (two days later), the ‘three teams’ solution was no longer the best solution and my spidey senses were going off. Our full team were sent home to work remotely for the foreseeable future. That’s how quickly things were changing. 

That night, I went for dinner with some friends as a kind of “last supper” before we chose to start social distancing. For the entire meal, my mind was reeling, we spoke about the impacts this may have in our businesses and the wider economic damage to the country that lay ahead—within a few weeks, we went from celebrating our new studio, to feeling like we’d possibly be fighting for our livelihoods. All of a sudden, the fear and the disbelief overwhelmed me and I could feel my eyes welling up with tears. 

The weekend was a blur. I felt panicked about what to do next. I also knew there would be a huge undertaking of effort that would be required and I wasn't sure at this point if I had the energy to do it. I also felt frustrated that people weren’t acknowledging the full impact of this virus—both from a health and economic perspective. I felt grief for the business I’d built for eight years and the earth-shattering fear that it could be gone within a few months. But most of all, I felt genuinely worried for my family, my team, our clients and the wider community. Over that weekend, I did long hours, speaking to every business owner I know to get an idea of what was happening. I also posted a lot on social media, but genuinely can’t remember much about it (I think I may have blacked-out for a bit. Joke - no joke!) If my posts from those days are anything to go by, I had the absolute fear. 

Week 2

On Monday, we had the first virtual all-hands meeting in MadeBrave history. In this hangout, I had to be a realist—“the challenge we’re about to face is no joke.” It wasn’t the most enjoyable all-hands meeting I’ve ever had, but the only way you can adapt is by understanding where you currently sit. It's also important when times are tough that as a leader you communicate as much as you can and on a regular basis. I also find it important to share challenges with your team and let them know if you don't know how to fix them. People will amaze you and help find solutions. There is no point going silent because you don't have an answer to what's happening. Share that with people and create the solution together.

For me, people deserve to know exactly what’s happening within a business, even when the chips are down and things are difficult. At the end of the day, their jobs and lives are directly impacted by that information. As a leader in your business, we owe it to our teams to be honest and transparent. 

Within a few hours, my team had set up a Slack channel called ‘Covid Ideas’ with thoughts on how we could help others and become part of a wider solution. I felt so inspired. That week, we created a LinkedIn group for fellow creatives in the Creative Industry to encourage peer-to-peer support and help with knowledge sharing and sign-posting to loans and grants (which now has over 3,000 members), teamed up with Glasgow Chamber of Commerce to host a free group collaboration webinar, partnered with Rachael Brown from Creative Entrepreneurs Club to set up a jobs board and offer free 1-1 support for those struggling and looking for advice and got NABS involved to provide mental health support (NABS is an incredible organisation that supports the mental health & wellbeing of people like us in the advertising and media industries.)

I realised that especially now, the survival of our businesses relies on the survival of our industry. We shouldn’t be trying to push our competitor’s heads underwater when we’re in this wave together - we should work together and help one and other. These ‘unprecedented times’ also activated my purpose—inspiring creativity and helping others. These are the things I believe I'm good at and are the basis of what I can give back to my community. I’ve never felt that more alive in my belly than I do now. 

Above all, I felt incredibly blessed for having my team around me. Earlier that week, we set a joint mission to lead our way out of this situation and every day, they’ve gone above and beyond to do exactly that. 

Week 3-ish

Over the weekend, Fin (my 8yo son) and I decided to figure out how to become TikTok famous (search for ‘EntertainingDad’ and you’ll find us). Despite being house-bound and all the madness going on in the world, it gave us something fun and creative to do. 

Hanging out with Fin and being creative just for the sake of it made me feel relaxed for the first time since all this began. I was able to start the week with a more positive outlook and had something to look forward to doing after ‘work’ was over for the day.

By this point, I accepted “the new normal” and decided to readjust and adapt around it. I felt positive again, and felt much more like I could be in control to shape what the future was going to look like. By Thursday, Keenan (our Brand Manager) and I were hosting a free webinar to give some practical help and advice on how to look after your brand in tough times (if you missed it, you can watch it back here.) It’s the first in a series and we’re planning to do more, so keep an eye on the MadeBrave channels.

On Friday, I realised how many people had called to check-in after speaking to me a few weeks ago. At first, I felt self-conscious—were my mental health struggles really that obvious? But then, I felt nothing but gratitude for the people who cared enough to reach out. 

That’s why I decided to write this post. When you’ve struggled with mental health, it can be terrifying to talk about it for multiple reasons. I know that being honest about mental health has the potential to help others, but I also know that it can be really daunting to open up. Mental Health UK say that “1 in 4 people is affected by a mental health problem every year. By sharing stories we can help end stigma and start conversations”

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t hover over the publish button a few times, but like I said at the top, if reading this can help even one person talk about what’s going on in their heads, then it’s worth it. 

If you feel like you are struggling and are looking for support try NABS or SAMH

How have you felt over the last few weeks? If you prefer to chat in private, send me a message—I’m always here to help.