How Containing Ego Helped Me Learn Faster
Vivek Singh
I help people speak with Authority & Charisma | Executive Leadership Coach | TEDx Speaker | Bestselling Author
This month I was tasked to acquire a new skill in my community, Miraculous. I had a tough time zeroing down to something that interests me, fits my schedule and is useful. Finally, I locked Pottery. Instead of going to a professional coach, I decided to learn from my neighbourhood potter, Rajesh because of accessibility. When he saw my car stopping, his eyes twinkled as if a customer had arrived. As I talked about my desire to learn pottery, he felt as if I was joking and returned his eyes to the wheel on which he was shaping a pot from swivelling clay. That was a signal of his disinterest. Considering my persistence, he said 'yes' but, subject to a fee. When he asked for a fee, my ego got triggered, how can an illiterate potter set a condition. I wanted to pay him the way I liked and expected him to be obliged for offering him an opportunity to coach me. But, he was firm, his eyes displayed no intent to buzz. This was the time to check my ego, without any negotiation I knelt down, got closer to the wheel on which he was working and asked if I could touch. This was my 'Yes.' Then he asked me where I lived, which car I drove and what kind of money I made. In a few minutes, we were more comfortable and he even offered to set up a wheel on the table so that I could learn better. As he explained to me how many items he produces per hour and how teaching me will lead to loss of production time and material, I realised the price he asked for was quite low. Now, I'm going to have two sessions in a day and am already thinking about how I can add more value to my coach's life. This experience leaves me with the following learnings:
1. The first step to learning is releasing one's ego
2. Do not undervalue the time and work of others and
3. The seller has the right to set a price.
Today, the table was turned. Now I know, when I quote a price to coach my clients, many of them highly placed (CEOs, politicians, celebrities) what exactly goes into their mind. After working with Rajesh, my Pottery Coach, I'm a step above both as a coach and as a coachee. This learning will go a long way.