How to connect with anyone.

I posted recently on LinkedIn "Eleven RUBBISH reasons people ask me to connect on Linkedin."

I think most people could relate to it. A few people went on to ask what are GOOD reasons to connect?

So I thought it might be useful to share my approach to connecting with people on LinkedIn and turning that connection into a meaningful relationship.

First up let's deal with the ?? in the room.

Why you might be getting ignored.

Imagine a LinkedIn page is someone's house and you are knocking on the door of a stranger. How do you introduce yourself?

Do you immediately ask to come in for a coffee?

Do you try and sell them something?

Are you like the old door to door insurance salespeople who hassled their way into people's homes and browbeat them until they bought a policy?

There's a reason why that sales practice doesn't exist anymore. It is because people simply won't tolerate it.

Before sending your connection request, imagine the default response is ignore, it's your job to turn it into an accept.

What is a good reason for someone to accept?

Everyone has their own preferences but I'm going to go with some universal truths.

Truth 1. NO ONE wants to be sold to

Truth 2. NO ONE likes to be hassled

Truth 3. EVERYONE is focused on their priorities

So if you are connecting with someone for the first time with the intent of asking for a sales call, asking for a job, asking for advice, promoting your podcast/blog, promoting your services or basically pushing YOUR AGENDA you will likely fail and in the process annoy the people you want to connect with.

So, what is a GOOD reason to connect with someone?

Any connection request that benefits me is a GOOD connection request. It may sound selfish, but running a business takes more than time. It requires a lot of energy and focus. Every disruption costs my business energy, focus, time and money. So I MUST be disciplined in accepting connection requests.

We are all busy and have our own priorities, business, clients, family, finances there's a lot your average person has to deal with. So, if a stranger interrupts your day with a connection request, are they hassling you or helping you?

That all depends on what your priorities are at the time. If you have just lost your job and a recruiter sends a connection request, now is a great time to accept! But if you have just put up an advert to hire staff?! You know where I'm coming from, right?

It's difficult to know what any persons priorities are at any time. And it's best not to try and guess. That's why I have certain criteria I apply whenever I am sending a request or accepting one.

NEVER ask for anything. No explanation, I just don't do it.

Is it relevant? If the CTO from Afterpay (or anyone from the Fintech industry) sends me a connection request, I don't care if there is no intro. I can assume we are connecting because there is a clear benefit for both parties at some point in the future.

If I am connecting with someone in Fintech I provide a simple message introducing myself "Hi, I run Tier One People, we help companies like Revolut launch in Aus. I also host and produce Australia's leading Fintech podcast. It would be great to connect"

If it isn't relevant to Fintech, has the person provided a good reason to connect? Here are some good reasons. You have followed my posts for a while, you listen to my podcast, you work in an adjacent industry where there are potential partnership opportunities, you are a person of influence who can promote my brand, someone we both know has suggested we connect. I automatically accept any request from people who are recommended by other people I know and trust. Notice something here?

Make the reason you are connecting about the other person. I've built my whole business and network by connecting and giving. Tier One People continues to support many Fintech startups and founders long before they become clients. This makes connecting easy because people can immediately see the benefit to them. If you make the connection request about your agenda, it is very difficult to persuade a stranger to sacrifice their priorities for your priorities.

Connect with the business leader. You might have a highly relevant reason to connect. But are you connecting with the right person?

This is a lesson that was reinforced to me last year when I launched the Fintech Talent Market. We helped people impacted by Covid19 find jobs by connecting them with Fintech Australia members, no fees, a totally free service!

But it was arduous work, why? Because my LinkedIn approaches to Talent Acquisition were consistently ignored. In the end, I had to pull rank, reach out to the CEO and I very quickly got enthusiastic responses. A business leader cares about their brand and is always honoured when someone is interested in their business. So, if you have a good reason to connect, you are likely to be way more relevant to a CEO than an internal recruiter.

Finally here are my 7 ??Golden rules for connecting

1. NEVER ask for anything
2. Be relevant
3. Be respectful
4. Find a genuine way to connect, make it about the other person
5. Be targetted and specific with your connection requests
6. Follow before connecting - this helps in crafting a relevant reason to connect
7. Don't take rejection personally

And finally, don't give up, if the connection is truly worthwhile you will find other ways.

Hope this helps you in growing your network.

Dexter Cousins is Managing Director of Tier One People, an executive search consultancy delivering world-class talent to world-class Fintech.

Companies like Revolut, 10x, TrueLayer and many others trust Tier One People to launch, scale and innovate.

Find out more - https://tieronepeople.com/ [email protected]

?? Check out my podcast??