How Communication Fails, Except by Accident (and What to Do About It)

"But that’s not what I actually meant!”

Have you found that your best efforts to communicate are often misunderstood?

That’s because anytime there are two people conversing, there are actually six people in the conversation:

• who you think you are,
• who you think the other person is,
• who you think the other person thinks you are,
• who the other person thinks he/she is,
• who the other person thinks you are, and
• who the other person thinks you think he/she is.

And that's not all! Remember the funny-but-true Murphy’s Law: “Anything that can go wrong will go wrong”? There's a just as humorously formulated serious observation about human communication!

If Communication Can Fail, It Will

Wiio's Laws of Communication are the human communications equivalent of Murphy’s Laws. Put forward by the late Osmo Wiio, a Finnish author, economist, parliamentarian and the Head of the School of Communications at the University of Helsinki, the laws explain why communication usually fails.

Wiio’s laws are often narrowed down to a fundamental message:

Communication Usually Fails, Except By Accident

Here's a glimpse at some of the corollaries:

- If communication can fail, it will

- If communication cannot fail, it still most usually fails

- If communication seems to succeed in the intended way, there's a misunderstanding

- If you are content with your message, communication certainly fails

- If a message can be interpreted in several ways, it will be interpreted in a manner that maximizes the damage

Though tongue-in-cheek, Wiio’s laws console me when I fail.

They also help me admit the nuggets of truth in each one, and to build upon them to try to communicate more effectively.