How to choose a coach?

A lot of times people await divine intervention with the parting of clouds & a stentorian voice giving you the location of your divinely chosen coach. Well, for that to happen it would just take a millennia. Jokes apart. ?During my different discussions with my circle of friends I have encountered queries as what should be the process of choosing the right coach. So I decided dive into the deep & hold forth.

Majority of us mortals are resistant to change due to fear of the unknown, disruption of our comfort zones, the loss of control, & fear of failure. Throw in the seasoning of cognitive dissonance, social pressure, and potential loss of status also contribute to this resistance to explore the unknown.

What is the hurdle? The environment that the person exists plays a limiting role. So that when an individual starts the process of undergoing coaching, they face copious hurdles ranging from perceived stigma viewing coaching as a sign of weakness. Cost and time commitments also deter many while being skeptical about coaching’s value & worry about confidentiality. Incomplete knowledge about the process of coaching also trips up the process. After the individual jumps through these self-made barriers, they face the next big & most important question. How to choose a coach?

The most important step is for the individual to understand what is that they would like to achieve from the process of coaching. We must keep in mind that what the person may need may/would evolve, but it is important they have a general idea what they are looking for. A path which many follow up is too read up about the art of coaching, which is a good starting point. Then the most followed path is to ask around amongst their fraternity to look for persons who have experienced coaching. Then this would entail some asking for references. I would classify this as the easy part. The difficult part is to be aware of all these guardrails & then look for a coach who is the right fit for your goals, & your developmental needs. Here are the key factors to consider:

1.???? Experience & Expertise – This is a no brainer. The experience IMHO the best coaches are those who have managed to meld together both life experiences into their DNA & their practice as a coach.

2.???? Coaching Certifications & Qualifications – the art of coaching does not come naturally to majority of us mortals. Undergoing trainings can be a catalyst for increasing your ability to provide coaching. In coaching I have always believed it depends on the practitioner of the art rather than the art itself. There are many ways that coaching can be given like:

• International Coaching Federation (ICF)
• Marshall Goldsmith
• Transactional analysis [TA]
• Neuro Linguistic programming (NLP)
• Spiritual coaching
• And many more

3.???? Continual education – This can be tough to assess but has to be done. You do not want to be coached by a person who is got some unchanging ideas of coaching stuck in the head. Speak to the person, challenge them with some what ifs, read what the person writes about the art of coaching or even of life. This will give you an insight of the person who may be your coach.

4.???? Personal Fit – This is super important as otherwise you would not be able to open up your coach. It is highly necessary that your relationship is highly personal with heavy dose of having rapport, trust, & with lots of mutual respect is essential

5.???? Query the coach – It is important to query the coach on the different types of issues that the coach has had to deal with during their coaching career as this would give you an understanding of the expertise.

6.???? Transparency – Your coach must be transparent & educate you about the limits of what coaching can do for the client. Avoid coaches who pitch themselves as the be all & end all coach who can effortlessly transcend between multiple disciplines or schools of thoughts.

7.???? ?Confidentiality & adhering to Ethics – This must be the baseline of all coaches. As a client you must feel & know within yourself that these important aspects would be adhered to.

8.???? Availability & Flexibility of sessions – This is rather self-explanatory but must be clarified as at times a client can be existing in a dynamic work environment. So to have a session some amount of flexibility is necessary. Same would the case for any access between sessions

9.???? Costs – This is a sensitive issue & this would depend on what the client believes on the value that they are getting & what the value that the coach is imparting. An important tip is that the client should look at this as an investment in self.

10.? Emotional intelligence – A coach must have dollops of emotional intelligence. As that would make the coach be able to empathize with your challenges, understand complex emotional dynamics while being present.

11.? Can the coach listen – You don’t want a coach who is always wanting to unleash some new tool/framework/template on you just because they have learnt it. And in the process no listen to you & if you are lucky, you will meet a coach who can hear the unsaid too.?

We must remember that these points are not cast in stone. The client can always discard all these points or have their own templates that would work. We have to remind ourselves that ultimately it’s your [client's] life so whatever work you are doing in finding the right coach is an investment. As a client look for coach whose approach emphasises building meaningful coaching relationships rather than providing solutions. Your sessions must be useful in exploring your internal & external reality. The coach must always be present in thought, word & deed during the session. Even at the end of all of this during your discussions you don’t feel that the coach is not feeling right for you. Then it’s important that as a client you take the step of breaking off the contract. All mature coaches will understand & would support your step.

To sum it up initiating the process of looking for a coach is a great step as you have decided to evolve. [many don’t they just keep pondering] A great place to start would be to identifying what you want to achieve. As an individual you must for having a sustainable coaching relationship do some pre-work so that you get a coach who ensures that you get a wholesome coaching experience.        

As an individual you will to invest a lot of effort and money in a coach, so make the initial investment of time and judiciousness to find the right coach for you. Do it as you are your biggest asset. Invest wisely.

ps - these are my thoughts & my take on the art of coaching. I would welcome thoughts & counters too.

If any of you would like to discuss this more. Let's speak. Do book a slot at https://calendly.com/paul-devassy-iirisknowledge