How Changing Your Perspective Can Change Your Life - Be the Third Stonecutter

Have you ever found yourself stuck in a situation where everything feels like drudgery? You know the one—where it feels like all you’re doing is grinding away, task after task, day after day. I think we’ve all been there. But what if the key to transforming that monotony lies not in changing the work itself but in changing how you see it? What if a simple shift in your mindset could make all the difference?

I’m reminded of a story about three stonecutters that illustrates this perfectly. It’s a tale I love to share, not just because of its simplicity but because it packs such a powerful punch when it comes to changing how we view the tasks—and ultimately the life—we build for ourselves.

The Story of the Three Stonecutters

Imagine a sunny morning at a bustling cathedral construction site. The air is alive with the sounds of hammers hitting stone, and amidst the flurry of activity, three stonecutters are hard at work. Along comes a traveller who, curious about their efforts, asks each of them the same question, “What are you doing?”

The first stonecutter, not looking up from their work, grumbles, “I’m cutting stone.” Their tone is flat, and their energy is even flatter. They see this task as nothing more than a necessary evil, just a paycheck at the end of the week.

The second stonecutter, with a bit more pep in their voice, says, “I’m building a wall.” They have a clearer sense of purpose—they understand that they’re contributing to something that will stand tall and strong long after they’re finished. There’s a hint of pride in their voice, but their focus is still somewhat limited.

Then the third stonecutter looks up and, with a gleam in their eye, exclaims, “I’m building a cathedral!” Their face lights up as they gesture toward the sky, seeing not just the stone in front of them, not just the wall, but the magnificent structure that will one day stand tall, reaching toward the heavens. To them, this work is sacred, purposeful, and deeply fulfilling. They aren’t just cutting stone—they’re creating something that will inspire awe for centuries to come.

Now, what’s fascinating here is that all three of these stonecutters are doing the same job. But the way they see their work? That’s what makes all the difference.?

Same Task, Different Perspective

What’s happening here? Why does the same work feel so different to each stonecutter? It’s all about perspective.?

The first stonecutter’s view is narrow. They’re focused on the task in front of them, seeing it as small and monotonous. For them, there’s no bigger picture, no sense of connection to something greater. Their job is just a means to an end.??

The second stonecutter has a broader view. They see their work as part of a bigger process, something tangible. They’re building a wall, and that’s important to them. Their perspective gives them a little more satisfaction, but it’s still grounded in the immediate, the here and now.

And then there’s the third stonecutter. They’re not just building a wall; they’re building a cathedral. Their work, though the same as the other two, is infused with meaning and purpose. They’re driven by a vision of the future, by the knowledge that their effort will contribute to something grand and timeless.

The lesson here is simple yet profound: Your perspective shapes your reality. It’s not always the circumstances that define your experience—it’s how you choose to see them.

How Your Perspective Can Shape Your Life

Now, you might be thinking, “That’s a nice story, but how does it apply to my life?” Well, in my experience, both as a fellow human being and as a high performance coach—it applies more than you think.

When I look back at my own life, I can pinpoint several moments where a shift in perspective changed everything for me. One such moment came when I was in a place of deep despair. I was following a life plan that wasn’t mine. I had ticked all the boxes—good job, house, marriage, children—but something was missing. I was cutting stones, so to speak, and feeling utterly lost.

It wasn’t until I shifted my perspective that things began to change. I stopped seeing my life as a series of milestones to achieve and started asking myself deeper questions: What do I really want? What am I building here? That’s when I realised I didn’t have to just go through the motions. I had the power to create something meaningful, something beautiful. And that’s when I started building my own cathedral—a life aligned with my true self.

Be the Third Stonecutter

So, how can you make that shift? How can you go from feeling like you’re just cutting stone to knowing that you’re building a cathedral?

1. Reconnect with Your Purpose

Like the third stonecutter, try to see the bigger picture of what you’re creating. Why are you doing what you’re doing? Maybe you’re in a demanding job, or you’re juggling a million things at once. But instead of focusing on the grind, ask yourself: What’s the end goal? What’s the cathedral you’re building??

If you’re in a corporate role, for example, and it feels like you’re just putting out fires every day, take a step back and think about the broader impact of your work. Are you helping people? Creating something that will make a difference? Sometimes, simply reconnecting with that larger purpose can reignite your motivation and joy; I know it did for me.

2. Take Pride in the Process

There’s nobility in showing up and doing the work, even when it feels mundane. I often remind my clients that progress isn’t always flashy or immediate. Sometimes, it’s in the daily grind, the small, consistent efforts that we create something lasting. It’s like planting seeds—some days, it feels like all you’re doing is digging in the dirt. But those seeds are growing roots, and eventually, they’ll bloom.

The second stonecutter understood this. They knew that building the wall was important, even if it wasn’t glamorous. And that pride in the process is what can carry you through the tough days.

3. Shift Your Focus

It’s easy to get caught up in the minutiae of life—the meetings, the emails, the never-ending to-do lists. But sometimes, the best thing you can do is zoom out. Look at the big picture. What are you working toward in the long run? How will today’s efforts contribute to your future success?

And if that doesn’t help, try zooming in instead. Sometimes, finding joy in the small details—the satisfaction of a well-written email, the way the sunlight hits your desk in the afternoon—can be just as powerful.

4. Surround Yourself with Support

Even the third stonecutter didn’t build that cathedral alone. They were part of a larger effort, working alongside others to bring that vision to life. And the same goes for us. When you’re feeling stuck or unmotivated, it can make all the difference to have people around you who support your vision, who remind you of the bigger picture when you lose sight of it.

In my coaching programs, I’ve seen firsthand the power of community and accountability. Whether it’s through group coaching or one-on-one sessions, having someone in your corner who believes in your potential can reignite that spark when it’s starting to dim.

Change Your Perspective, Change Your Life

At the end of the day, the stonecutters teach us one important truth: How you see your life is how you live your life. If you see your tasks as mere stones to cut, you’ll feel like you’re endlessly toiling away. But if you see them as part of something greater, something with purpose and meaning, everything changes.

You don’t need to change your job, your relationships, or even your daily routine to start feeling fulfilled. What you can change is how you view them. Shift your perspective, and suddenly, what seemed mundane becomes meaningful. What felt like a grind becomes an opportunity. And that, my friend, is how you start building your cathedral.

So, next time you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or just plain bored with your day-to-day, remember: Be the third stonecutter. Look up from the stone in front of you and envision the cathedral you’re building. Because the truth is, you’re not just cutting stone. You’re creating something far more meaningful—and it’s going to be magnificent.?

Are you ready to build your cathedral? Let's start today . I’m here to help you discover the tools, habits, and mindset shifts that will take you from where you are to where you want to be. Your future self will thank you.

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Your Coach

Stephanie