How can you tell if your child is ready for a smartphone? What are the alternatives?

The start of the school year means some parents are asking a big question: is it time for a child’s first phone? This year however the focus has shifted. There isn't the assumption that the first phone is a smartphone, and readiness rather than age takes centre stage.

Let's reframe this question and answer.

Safety concerns, particularly around travel to and from school, or being home after school without a parent, often drive this decision. There can also be hge social pressure if many of a child’s friends have a phone.

But it doesn’t have to be inevitable. How can you tell if your child is ready for a smartphone? What are the alternatives? And how do you set achievable, healthy boundaries if your child does get a phone?

Why a phone is a big decision

Many parents will be aware of the concerns about children’s wellbeing around technology, including potential harms to mental health, if they are exposed to inappropriate content, bullying or simply use the phone too much.

Studies also show it can lead to dependence on the phone and distraction or lack of focus at school and in general. So it’s important to make good choices and provide family support alongside this.

How do you know if your child is ready for a phone?

Appropriate phone ownership does not necessarily depend on a child’s age but on a child’s readiness and family circumstances.

Recent studies show children who receive phones based on readiness rather than age show better long-term digital habits. These include managing the constant distraction of phones and good judgement around the content they regularly browse and engage with.

You can look at a child’s child’s readiness for a phone in several ways:

• how responsible are they with the technology they already use?
• do they follow family guidelines around screen time?
• how willing are they to discuss their online experiences with you? Do they come to you if there is a problem or something they don’t understand?
• do they have a basic understanding of digital privacy and security?
• what’s their decision-making like offline? What are they like with family, friends and other responsibilities?

Non-phone options

If you decide yes, your child is ready, they don’t necessarily have to go straight to a smartphone with all the bells, whistles and apps.

For basic safety requirements, such as travel to school, a smartwatch or basic phone can allow your child to receive and make calls and texts, but without accessing the internet.

If you want to prioritise social connection (so a child isn’t left out with friends), you could might start with a shared family tablet featuring supervised messaging apps. This allows children to maintain friendships within set boundaries.

How to manage the transition to a phone

As children demonstrate growing independence and digital maturity, they can progress to restricted smartphones with parental controls, gradually earning more privileges through demonstrated responsibility.

Or your child could have a smartphone with regular “check ins”. Here parents and the child discuss and review common challenges such as managing notifications, apps the child is permitted to use and where the phone can be used.

Final note

This approach acknowledges full smartphone access isn’t an immediate necessity but rather the final stage in a thoughtful digital progression.

Research indicates families who implement this graduated approach report fewer conflicts around technology as well as better long-term digital habits in their children.

Parental and child pressure is hard to deal with but its lessening -slightly. The key lies in matching technology access to genuine needs rather than perceived social pressure, while maintaining clear boundaries and open communication.