How can we Counteract our Disappearing Relationships?

The following is adapted from the best-selling book Solving the People Problem and the Solving the People Problem Field Guide for Leaders.

Our Relationships are Disappearing

Emotional intelligence is a challenge in today’s world partly because our genuine, trust-filled work relationships are disappearing. Increasingly, we communicate via screens, instead of through person-to-person conversation. We build our relationships through texts, Facebook, Instagram, email, and other apps. All of us joke about people sitting together and “talking” through their instant messages instead of engaging in a personal dialogue. How often are we one of the characters in this scene? In the work environment, we put more thought and time into our spreadsheets and reports than in how we communicate with our colleagues.

Creating relationships outside of electronics is a real challenge now, especially given COVID. This is especially true as we move towards more working from home and less working in the office. We interact with each other less frequently. And often when we are interacting with others, those interactions are brief, to the point and limited in scope.

How can we Counteract that?

But we need to break free from that current standard. Engaging in meaningful communication - at work and elsewhere - is a key to creating the kind of relationships that we want to create. So how can we increase our emotional intelligence to create those relationships?

To raise the emotional intelligence of ourselves and our teams, we need to have a language and structure to investigate our actions and motivations. We will use the language of DISC to help us explore these ideas both for ourselves and our teams. Our interactions and results are improved when we understand ourselves and others better. The consideration and analysis of our unconscious behaviors and misunderstood interactions can then evolve into high levels of awareness and appreciation that are mutually beneficial.

Looking at our model below, you can see how those ideas interact with each other. Learning to understand yourself and others and then applying the things you’ve learned is going to greatly improve your emotional intelligence and your relationships.

In the time of COVID and our physical separation, it becomes even more critical for us to be attentive and intentional about our connections, relationships and communications. While our current situation makes this a challenge, it also creates an opportunity for us. Spending the time and effort to build stronger connections now will pay off for us throughout our careers and relationships into the future.

To find out where you currently stand regarding emotional intelligence, take the Solving The People Problem Survey.

Brett M. Cooper and Evans Kerrigan help professionals like you build work relationships that really work. Over the last twenty years, they’ve influenced thousands of people in government, non-profits, and corporate America to work together in more productive, more effective, and more human ways. Through Integris Performance Advisors—the firm they co-founded—Brett and Evans have helped clients increase employee engagement, improve efficiency, and generate hundreds of millions in financial benefit. Brett and Evans are frequent speakers on team dynamics, leadership, and operational excellence. To access more great content and resources, and to connect directly with Brett and Evans, visit SolvingThePeopleProblem.com.