How Can Managers Protect Their Mental Health?

Managers are responsible for many aspects of the workplace, such as training employees, ensuring a safe work environment, and maintaining the vitality of the business. But with these many responsibilities, leaders must take time to check on themselves — making sure they have the tools to remain resilient for whatever changes to come.?

By Helen Harris

As a manager or C-suite leader within your company, you’ve likely experienced many seasons at your workplace. You may have supported and mentored employees, and even had tough talks that you didn’t want to have.?

In good and bad times, “your people” expect you to handle it all. And that’s what you’re there to do.

But how do you deal with the stress, the guilt that often comes with layoffs, and best plan for the business’s longevity with the uncertain economic landscape that lies ahead????

Beth Kennedy, leadership coach and trainer, and author of “Career ReCharge,” first advises — just like any flight attendant might state on an airplane — that you consider “putting on your own oxygen mask first,” as this is the only way you can efficiently lead others.??

How Managers Can Protect Mental Health Amid Chaos

The past few years have been challenging: First COVID-19, a major shift to virtual work, national and global upheavals and a volatile economy that has led to layoffs.??

The chaos of the world is not going to stop. But you can continue to be a level-headed leader by having a “toolbox” to stay resilient when challenges come your way.?

“At that high level, managers have to realize people are seeing [their reactions to stress], and they need to make resilience a priority,” said Kennedy.

And Kennedy states that to protect their mental health in challenging times, managers should be clear on their resilience and what the term means to them.?

“There's this old definition of resilience: Just keep working harder and you can deal with everything,” said Kennedy. “And the reality is, that's really not resilience. Resilience is being able to have a toolbox so that you can move forward despite these challenges.”?

She states that this hypothetical toolbox is built by asking yourself how you replenish your energy in stressful situations.?

For example, if you are someone who requires time alone (a walk, a book or even a nap) to deal with stress and don’t give yourself that space, you will eventually burn yourself out.?

On a more immediate level, if you have been dealing with burdens as a manager, such as layoffs, Michael Seaver, leadership coach, speaker and author of “I Know: A Practical Guide for Awakening to What's Within and Finding Work-Life Integration,” states that your first priority should be to call human resources, the employee assistance program (EAP) if available, a therapist or another trusted resource.?

“What we want [a manager] to do is get any pent-up or built-up emotions out of their body as quickly as possible,” said Seaver. “And there are emotional benefits to that mental benefits but also physical benefits to it, as well. “If they let those emotions build up over time, that can lead to different types of emotional responses or physical illness.”?

Seaver also notes the importance of remembering the “three Ps” as a manager when your company is going through a drastic change. The three Ps were developed by psychologist Martin Seligman and are as follows:?

Personalization: Seaver explains that personalization is a reminder that you are not at fault for the changes that are occurring around you.?

“We are psychologically hardwired to take the blame for things as though we were the ones that were causing the problem,” said Seaver. “But the truth is, that personalization says we are not at fault.”?

Permanence: This moment may feel like it’s lasting forever, and may feel like you have no way out. But Seaver states that the human brain naturally thinks that the feelings of blame or harm will last forever. Remember, it won’t.?

“What you're feeling right now is not permanent, and it will very quickly go away,” said Seaver.?

Pervasiveness: “You may believe that this change is going to affect every area of your life — but that’s not true,” said Seaver. “The vast majority of your life remains unchanged, but this one big focus area is just taking all your emotions.”??

Seaver additionally states that feelings such as guilt, remorse, imposter syndrome, blame or a general, deep sadness are to be expected but that you can push through these feelings by appropriately starting fresh. He calls this “honoring and letting go.”?

“It is easy when [tough changes] occur for a manager to feel survivor's guilt,” said Seaver. “You feel deep remorse that you couldn't help others. And it's okay to honor and respect yourself that you're feeling this because all humans have a very innate desire for personal growth and development but also for the contribution to others' growth and development. So we feel survivor's guilt that we can't further our contribution to others. And it's okay to honor that and let it go.”

And with layoffs, in particular, Seaver states that it can be very helpful to a manager’s health to focus on the environmental factors at hand when making decisions.

This does not mean that you should not process your emotions, the people who have left the company and the changes to come. Seaver recommends quite the opposite, noting that if there has been a substantial change in the company, you should hold a ceremony of sorts. He states that by doing this, you will be able to end any ongoing anxiety, nervousness and worry and draw a psychological line in the sand.

Understanding Burnout and Stress in Leaders?

“Burnout is something we have to take seriously, especially at the management level,” said Kennedy. “There's five stages of burnout, and managers [need to be familiar with] these warning signs.”?

She identifies the five stages as the following:?

The honeymoon: “This is the stage when you’re just working all the time and that dopamine is kicking in,” said Kennedy. “It's kind of exciting.” You hardly notice the stress at this stage and view your workload as normal.?
Fuel shortage: Kennedy states that this is the stage when you begin to feel exhausted. You might be tired, have trouble sleeping, feel inefficient, or even develop unhealthy coping mechanisms.?
Chronic symptoms: Your physical symptoms of stress will likely surface at this stage (illnesses, irritation, anger, long periods of low mood).?
Crisis: This stage is when you may begin developing an escapist mentality because you feel it’s your only way out of your stressful situation. You may experience self-doubt, cynicism and general dissatisfaction.
Hitting the wall: This final stage of burnout is exactly what it sounds like — you run out of steam, totally shut down and “hit your wall.” Why does this happen? Because you have been so engulfed in your stress (and not dealing with it) that you have succumbed to emotional and physical symptoms of burnout.?

While it may seem like your world is crumbling once you’ve hit the wall, it’s critical for you as a manager to find tactics to pull yourself out of distress and build healthy habits to best protect your mental (and physical) health moving forward. It’s only by doing this that you’ll be able to effectively lead your employees and advocate for them to do the same.

So how do you take steps to rebuild if you’ve hit a wall? Or if you haven’t hit a wall, how do you set boundaries so you can protect your mental health??

Kennedy states that it all begins with self-awareness.?

Tactics for Managers To Remain Calm and Healthy Under Stress??

“They need to focus on their self-awareness and their well-being,” said Kennedy. “And it can be done in small strategies.”?

Elaborating on one tactic with which to do this, Kennedy further states that she advises her clients to use a tactic called the “Friday Five.”?

She states that it's a planned five-minute appointment on the calendar (on Friday) in which you assess your week and ask yourself what you did for your well-being.?

For example, if you have the goal to exercise three times a week but realize you got too busy and tired to meet your goal — that Friday reflection is your time to re-strategize and re-focus.?

“What happens is if managers don't schedule it — it doesn't happen,” said Kennedy.

Another simple tactic she stresses can have a huge impact on high-level managers is making the time to take breaks throughout the day and getting away from the screens and calls even for a couple of minutes. This helps not only your well-being, but keeps you from passing along what she calls “second-hand” stress to your employees.??

Seaver also notes a few methods for leaders to manage daily stress:?

Do your most difficult tasks an hour and a half after you wake up. This time frame is when the brain is most acute and productive.??
Hold daily stand-up meetings. This is a good time for everyone on the team to celebrate wins, address challenges or share company updates.?
Get supervisory support, if possible. Seaver explains that if you're a manager and? don't want to be anxious or worried about a course of action you're taking, you can ask your supervisor for some sort of support.?
Only focus on activities directly connected to your department or the organization's goals. Seaver encourages leaders to say “no” to anything not directly connected to a department or organizational goal, as that will prevent you (and your team) from becoming overworked.?
Tier your work. If you find yourself with a long list of things to do, Seaver recommends going through each of the items and prioritizing them into about three or four tiers.?

For example, the first tier could be urgent projects, the second tier could be situational (or if you have time to do them), and the third tier could be projects 30, 60 or 90 days out.?

On the topic of time management, Kennedy explains that if your team sees you setting the tone of working nonstop, never taking breaks, leaving late every day and generally looking exhausted that it sets an unhealthy tone for everyone.?

“That's not leadership anymore, and it’s not strategic,” said Kennedy. “[Healthier habits] begin by thinking about the impact you want every day. What's the reputation you want to have with your people? Part of your reputation — besides being productive and nailing your goals — should be that you’re resilient. And that resiliency means that you not only have a toolbox for yourself, but also for your team.”?

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