How can I help?

One of the basics, when you come to trust, is acting as if you were not searching it.

Actually we should never search for it. The movement of our actions should come from different perspectives, other than searching for trust. But why??

Well, let me explain it with an example. Let's say you are visiting a friend who has a serious health problem. You are visiting, as friend caring for the friend, but you also have to suggest him or her a new medication you know about, which has been really successful for the same problem with another friend of yours. You would like your friend to take you seriously, and... you are not a doctor.

Then you come to the point with your sick friend. You start describing the medication, your other friend success, how good was the solution for him, and so on. You certainly have a similar experience in your life, maybe it was not suggesting a treatment, it was something simpler. Any kind of counsel or tip you would like to advise. If you were simply explaining it, trying to bring in arguments in favor of your suggestion, you have possibly failed in being listened to the ninety-nine percent of the times.

This happens because you indirectly made the request of trust first and searched for it in your conversation. You should never do that if you are not at least professionally qualified to give a suggestion. In our case if you are not a doctor.

Let's, therefore, see the same situation, but instead of asking your sick friend to listen to you because you have something very important to him or her, you first make this question: "How can I help?" and you mean it.

If you give something first, it will be returned to you.

Give your suffering friend the chance to choose. Give him or her your trust that they are doing well, and put yourself in a position of service. This creates the magic of trust in your accountability, in your suggestions, without searching it. You will be possibly answered something like "I do not need anything, thank you", but the giving help need you expressed is still there. Whether your friend?accepts your help or not, you will be able to give your hints as a way to try helping. Not a pure simple advice. They know you are not qualified as a doctor, but you are a good friend, taking care of them. They will recognize in that care your?reliability and trust you are doing for their good.

This long description is made just to put you visually in a situation which might be very familiar with many. Who is the one who did not try to give a piece of advice to a friend.

But this situation can be transferred to your professional life very easily. When you meet your client or prospect and have a very good solution for them, never ever search for their trust into your solution. Simply ask them "How can I help?" and put yourself in the position to receive their questions, their ideas, their expectations. You will listen carefully and respect the fact they are actually searching something you might have. They possibly do not know if you have it really, or even if you are qualified. But if you offer your undivided attention to their problem, and your complete disposition to help them, you will be able to bring in your solution without the need to search their trust. You already have it, because you first gave it to them.

?

_________________________

Raffaella Grassi, is Senior Partner of Origami Engineering, an organization whose work is aimed at the improvement and dissemination of the new world trends in the field of Business Development and of High Technology Engineering. Grassi has a several-decade consolidated background as a C-level officer with a specialty in Management and Business Development, Contract Management, and Long Term Marketing Strategies. She also holds Interim C-level positions from time to time with major industrial and engineering players. She has a part in some inventions in the energy field and in industrial processes optimization. She writes on many blogs, like The Next Generation, about innovation, science, discoveries, or The Best Myself, about self-improvement. Visit About Me to know more about her, and follow @RaffaellaGrassi on Twitter.

__________________

Copyright & Disclaimer: Raffaella Grassi ? 2015. Any content is made and given as is, with no intent whatsoever to infringe any copyright and/or intellectual property. The information herein is given in good faith mentioning the source where it has been found, for the sole purpose of sharing the knowledge of that same information. No other purpose or commercial intent – nor explicit or implicit – is intended. Any comments or discussions published on these pages reflect the views of individual participants only and not the views of Raffaella Grassi which bears no responsibility and accepts no liability for the accuracy of participants’ comments. The contents of this article are not intended as and do not constitute advice and Raffaella Grassi disclaims any liability or responsibility for the accuracy thereof.

?