How Can I Help?

“I just need help,” I desperately pleated. “I don’t know where to go.”

These were the words I spoke last Monday in anguish. ?

I was at a breaking point with nothing more left to give.?

Can you relate? Have you seen this?

I metaphorically raised a flag and waved it. I threw up my hands.

A frantic signal for help.

What happened next was a miracle. I’d like to share a story if you care to listen.

Charlene

Before I met Charlene, I met a few others.

One individual tried to help but failed to actively listen.

They were a bit dismissive of my concerns and tried to problem solve immediately.

While they provided a solution, there was not compassion.

Others wanted to help but didn’t have the resources.?

What did they do? They connected. Connected me to Charlene.?

“Hi, this is X medical office, how can I help?,” stated Charlene.?

I began to put my head down in frustration and exhaustion, but with hope.

She viewed their calendar and gave me options.?

She asked me what would work for me and a question to gauge my concerns.

I will never forget the next thing I heard.?

“Would you like to come in right now,? Charlene asked kindly.?

“Really?,” I stammered in utter disbelief. “Right now?”

Charlene didn’t ask for my name.

She didn’t ask for information.

She simply stated, “Yes.”

As she provided directions, I dropped everything I was doing.

When I arrived, I was greeted by an empty lobby and two smiles.?

It felt like a dream.

One smile from Charlene and one from Paulo. I’ll share about him in a moment.

“Are you the incredibly nice lady I spoke with?” I vocalized.

“I think so,” she simply replied.

Now I'm not quite sure what I said next, but she handed me some papers.

With the kindness only I could describe as pure, she then asked me to wait.

The gentleman behind her looked up with curiosity and I looked back.?

"What interesting office staff," I thought to myself.

I braced myself for what was to come.

Paulo?

As I was waiting, a nice gentleman walked into the lobby.

Donuts in hand for Charlene.

“For you,” he stated.?

“You’re the best,” Charlene replied.

He turned around, paused for a brief moment, said hi, and walked out.

"That was nice", I thought.?

As I looked around the empty office, there wasn’t much decoration.

I did notice a banner.

“Never give up," it read.

"God", I silently prayed, "I’m trying".

“Kristen?,” a voice stated.

I scrambled to get up and landed faced to face with Charlene.

I looked up again and there was Paulo.

He stared back and simply said, “Are you ready?”

I jokingly explained, exhaustedly, “Oh, you get to hear my story? It’s a long one.”

I hadn’t even walked through the door yet.

“I’d like to hear it. Let’s see if we can figure it out together," he smiled.

"Finally," I thought.

"Not office staff," I remembered thinking. A nurse ready to hear me.

If this is how the nursing staff is like, maybe the doctor is too.

Paulo proceeded to take my vitals with care and made me laugh.

When the laughter subsided, "Are you in pain?, Paulo quizzingly asked.

I felt the gravity of that question like a ton of bricks.

"Pain", I thought to myself. He is asking about the physical, but man, pain.

The emotional pain? The physical pain?

I couldn't quite form the words, so I shook my head and tried to keep it together.

He showed me to a room.

He started to say his name and I lost it.

Big ugly tears.

I squeaked out something about being tired and lack of care.

"Tell me," he stated.

For the next 30 to 45 minutes, I did just that. I told my story. Childhood and all.

With a piece of paper the size of an index card, he asked a few questions.

He took a few notes.

At one point, I was inches from him still talking.

He simply listened.

He cared.

Before I left the room, I looked up at him and with only the energy I had:

"Thank you," I breathed. "Thank you for truly hearing me and listening."

He proceeded to get me connected to another medical office that day where I had a test that typically takes days.

I walked out of the room, and I saw Charlene.

"I didn't catch your name," I announced.

"Charlene," she replied.

"Thank you, thank you so much," I remarked.

I would have hugged her if there wasn't a desk between us.

"We are a bit different around here," Charlene exclaimed.

"I like different," I replied. "Those are my people."

Before I left, Paulo handed me a card.

"If you need anything, call our office." he proclaimed.

I glanced at the business card.

"Doctor Paulo," I read.

I also noticed an image of a tree of life on the card.

"Doctor?" I thought to myself. Incredible.

I called their office a few days later.

Waiting patiently for Charlene to answer, I heard a different voice on the phone.

"Hi, X medical."

Maybe I have the wrong number, I thought to myself.

I hung up and redialed.

"Hi, X medical."

"Hi?" I answered. "I have a question from my appointment," I stammered.

"Is this Kristen?," the voice calmly asked.

"Yes?" I stuttered.

The voice proceeded to explain some results and reassured me.

"Paulo," I thought to myself. Again, in utter disbelief.

Paulo answered the phone.

The nurse. The doctor. The office staff.

When have you had to be this person for someone else?

Regardless of your physical job title, we typically hold many roles.

In HR, I often play the caretaker, the confidant, the detective, and the mom.

Usually, all in one conversation. Sometimes I wear one role stronger.

Do we, however; ever say we need help and surrender?

I haven't quite figured out what is wrong, but I have some people in my corner.

I can trust that they will listen, and they will connect me to their people.

And you know what?

I will trust them too.

Why?

If your connections are as thoughtful, kind, and compassionate as you are, how can I lose?

I will be cared for.

The lesson this week is simply this:

• Ask for help - don't wait. Life is too precious. Get answers. Get support.
• Fight - fight for what you believe in, professionally and with conviction.
• Care - whole heartedly. You may not know their story. Be open to hearing it.
• Show compassion - you may save a life.
• Actively and kindly listen - you may hear how to help.

Just a Note.