How can I find direction for my life when I feel empty and have no aspirations left?

Many of my clients are going through a big change in their life when they seek support through coaching, e. g. becoming empty nesters, losing a parent they cared for or starting retirement. These transitions make them feel empty, uprooted, uncertain and lost. While it’s normal to feel like that it’s anything but easy. Ask me how I know!?!  

More often than not, we suffer and feel lost because we have been attached to and defined by our previous role as a parent, caretaker, or busy, successful professional.  When we step out of that role voluntarily or it's taken away from us, we may feel exactly that sense of void, loss, or confusion that leaves us without direction or ambition.

From my own experience, it takes commitment and courage to slow down and explore as we navigate those challenging and uncertain times of change.

And, when we commit to finding direction and happiness in our lives and we do the necessary work, we WILL (re-)gain that personal clarity, joy, and sense of purpose. However, it does take work, and here are a few initial explorations and activities for you to consider:  

More externally focused:

Ask some trusted people

...what they see as your strengths and your unique gifts

Make a list

...of things (activities, experiences, people) that bring you joy or spark your interest. Then, engage in them as much as possible.

Talk to people

...who are doing things that could possibly interest you, too. Find out more details and see if these things could be a fit for you.

More internally focused:

Fill out a ‘Wheel of Life’

...to identify and assess those aspects that make your life meaningful and rich. Click on the image to the right to access the 'Wheel of Life' exercise.

Contemplate some questions like… 

• ‘What am I supposed to learn from this time in my life?’
• ‘What REALLY matters to me in my life?’, e. g. laughter, contribution, personal growth, spirituality, friendship, etc.?
• ‘Who am I and what am I here for?’ (Granted, that's a big question but one worth pondering)
• ‘How do I want to be remembered?’

Connect to your intuition and your inner wisdom

...for example through sitting or active meditations. It will help you clarify what really matters in your life, who you are, and what you need/want.

Get support

As you are living through this time, you may find it helpful to get some outside support for accountability, feedback, and discussions around your activities and ponderings. Going through a big life change is challenging as it is and not easy to handle by yourself. So, I encourage you to be courageous and ask for the help of a trusted friend or family member.

Also, feel free to reach out to me for a complimentary, no-obligation Clarity Session to review your ‘Wheel of Life’. We may be able to identify a few suitable action steps for you so that you can move forward with greater clarity and enthusiasm.

Most importantly, please be kind to yourself and give yourself permission to go at your very own pace and explore. I wish you all the very best!