How Calculus Informs the Presidential Race

We all know that in Calculus, the derivative of a function is how it's CHANGING from one point to the next. That's how the 24-hour news cycle works. It reports on what has CHANGED since yesterday. Unfortunately, our memories aren't perfect, so we can get caught up in the derivative of current events and lose sight of the overall function being considered.

To get the actual VALUE of a function, instead of just how it's CHANGING, one must integrate that derivative between two endpoints, such as from some original point in time (starting point "a") to the present (endpoint "b").

Although the author is unknown, I took the liberty of reformatting his/her very long Facebook post that provides what could be argued "the integral" of Trump over time (or technically, the summation of 238 finite differences). The author says that Donald Trump:

1. "incited an insurrection against the government

2. mismanaged a pandemic that killed nearly half a million Americans

3. separated children from their families

4. lost those children in the bureaucracy

5. tear-gassed peaceful protesters on Lafayette Square so he could hold a photo op holding a Bible in front of a church

6. tried to block all Muslims from entering the country

7. got impeached

8. got impeached again

9. had the worst jobs record of any president in modern history

10. pressured Ukraine to dig dirt on Joe Biden

11. fired the FBI director for investigating his ties to Russia

12. bragged about firing the FBI director on TV

13. took Vladimir Putin’s word over the US intelligence community

14. diverted military funding to build his wall

15. caused the longest government shutdown in US history

16. called Black Lives Matter a “symbol of hate”

17. lied nearly 30,000 times

18. banned transgender people from serving in the military

19. ejected reporters from the White House briefing room who asked tough questions

20. vetoed the defense funding bill because it renamed military bases named for Confederate soldiers

21. refused to release his tax returns

22. increased the national debt by nearly $8 trillion

23. had three of the highest annual trade deficits in U.S. history

24. called veterans and soldiers who died in combat losers and suckers

25. coddled the leader of Saudi Arabia after he ordered the execution and dismembering of a US-based journalist

26. refused to concede the 2020 election

27. hired his unqualified daughter and son-in-law to work in the White House

28. walked out of an interview with Lesley Stahl

29. called neo-Nazis “very fine people”

30. suggested that people should inject bleach into their bodies to fight COVID

31. abandoned our allies the Kurds to Turkey

32. pushed through massive tax cuts for the wealthiest but balked at helping working Americans

33. incited anti-lockdown protestors in several states at the height of the pandemic

34. withdrew the US from the Paris climate accords

35. withdrew the US from the Iranian nuclear deal

36. withdrew the US from the Trans Pacific Partnership which was designed to block China’s advances

37. insulted his own Cabinet members on Twitter

38. pushed the leader of Montenegro out of the way during a photo op

39. failed to reiterate US commitment to defending NATO allies

40. called Haiti and African nations “shithole” countries

41. called the city of Baltimore the “worst in the nation”

42. claimed that he single handedly brought back the phrase “Merry Christmas” even though it hadn’t gone anywhere

43. forced his Cabinet members to praise him publicly like some cult leader

44. believed he should be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize

45. berated and belittled his hand-picked Attorney General when he recused himself from the Russia probe

46. suggested the US should buy Greenland

47. colluded with Mitch McConnell to push through federal judges and two Supreme Court justices after supporting efforts to prevent his predecessor from appointing judges

48. repeatedly called the media “enemies of the people”

49. claimed that if we tested fewer people for COVID we’d have fewer cases

50. violated the emoluments clause

51. thought that Nambia was a country

52. told Bob Woodward in private that the coronavirus was a big deal but then downplayed it in public

53. called his exceedingly faithful vice president a “p---y” for following the Constitution

54. nearly got us into a war with Iran after threatening them by tweet

55. nominated a corrupt head of the EPA

56. nominated a corrupt head of HHS

57. nominated a corrupt head of the Interior Department

58. nominated a corrupt head of the USDA

59. praised dictators and authoritarians around the world while criticizing allies

60. refused to allow the presidential transition to begin

61. insulted war hero John McCain – even after his death

62. spent an obscene amount of time playing golf after criticizing Barack Obama for playing (far less) golf while president

63. falsely claimed that he won the 2016 popular vote

64. called the Muslim mayor of London a “stone cold loser”

65. falsely claimed that he turned down being Time’s Man of the Year

66. considered firing special counsel Robert Mueller on several occasions

67. mocked wearing face masks to guard against transmitting COVID

68. locked Congress out of its constitutional duty to confirm Cabinet officials by hiring acting ones

69. used a racist dog whistle by calling COVID the “China virus”

70. hired and associated with numerous shady figures that were eventually convicted of federal offenses including his campaign manager and national security adviser

71. pardoned several of his shady associates

72. gave the Presidential Medal of Freedom to two congressman who amplified his batshit crazy conspiracy theories

73. got into telephone fight with the leader of Australia(!)

74. had a Secretary of State who called him a moron

75. forced his press secretary to claim without merit that his was the largest inauguration crowd in history

76. botched the COVID vaccine rollout

77. tweeted so much dangerous propaganda that Twitter eventually banned him

78. charged the Secret Service jacked-up rates at his properties

79. constantly interrupted Joe Biden in their first presidential debate

80. claimed that COVID would “magically” disappear

81. called a U.S. Senator “Pocahontas”

82. used his Twitter account to blast Nordstrom when it stopped selling Ivanka’s merchandise

83. opened up millions of pristine federal lands to development and drilling

84. got into a losing tariff war with China that forced US taxpayers to bail out farmers

85. claimed that his losing tariff war was a win for the US

86. ignored or didn’t even take part in daily intelligence briefings

87. blew off honoring American war dead in France because it was raining

88. redesigned Air Force One to look like the Trump Shuttle

89. got played by Kim Jung Un and his “love letters”

90. threatened to go after social media companies in clear violation of the Constitution

91. botched the response to Hurricane Maria in Puerto Rico

92. threw paper towels at Puerto Ricans when he finally visited them

93. pressured the governor and secretary of state of Georgia to “find” him votes

94. thought that the Virgin islands had a President

95. drew on a map with a Sharpie to justify his inaccurate tweet that Alabama was threatened by a hurricane

96. allowed White House staff to use personal email accounts for official businesses after blasting Hillary Clinton for doing the same thing

97. rolled back regulations that protected the public from mercury and asbestos

98. pushed regulators to waste time studying snake-oil remedies for COVID

99. rolled back regulations that stopped coal companies from dumping waste into rivers

100. held blatant campaign rallies at the White House

101. tried to take away millions of Americans’ health insurance because the law was named for a Black man

102. refused to attend his successors’ inauguration

103. nominated the worst Education Secretary in history

104. threatened judges who didn’t do what he wanted

105. attacked Dr. Anthony Fauci

106. promised that Mexico would pay for the wall (it didn’t)

107. allowed political hacks to overrule government scientists on major reports on climate change and other issues

108. struggled navigating a ramp after claiming his opponent was feeble

109. called an African-American Congresswoman “low IQ”

110. threatened to withhold federal aid from states and cities with Democratic leaders

111. went ahead with rallies filled with maskless supporters in the middle of a pandemic

112. claimed that legitimate investigations of his wrongdoing were “witch hunts”

113. seemed to demonstrate a belief that there were airports during the American Revolution

114. demanded “total loyalty” from the FBI director

115. praised a conspiracy theory that Democrats are Satanic pedophiles

116. completely gutted the Voice of America

117. placed a political hack in charge of the Postal Service

118. claimed without evidence that the Obama administration bugged Trump Tower

119. suggested that the US should allow more people from places like Norway into the country

120. suggested that COVID wasn’t that bad because he recovered with the help of top government doctors and treatments not available to the public

121. overturned energy conservation standards that even industry supported

122. reduced the number of refugees the US accepts

123. insulted various members of Congress and the media with infantile nicknames

124. gave Rush Limbaugh a Presidential medal of Freedom at the State of the Union address

125. named as head of federal personnel a 29-year old who’d previously been fired from the White House for allegations of financial improprieties

126. eliminated the White House office of pandemic response

127. used soldiers as campaign props

128. fired any advisor who made the mistake of disagreeing with him

129. demanded the Pentagon throw him a Soviet-style military parade

130. hired a shit ton of white nationalists

131. politicized the civil service

132. did absolutely nothing after Russia hacked the U.S. government

133. falsely said the Boy Scouts called him to say his bizarre Jamboree speech was the best speech ever given to the Scouts

134. claimed that Black people would overrun the suburbs if Biden won

135. insulted reporters of color

136. insulted women reporters

137. insulted women reporters of color

138. suggested he was fine with China’s oppression of the Uighurs

139. attacked the Supreme Court when it ruled against him

140. summoned Pennsylvania state legislative leaders to the White House to pressure them to overturn the election

141. spent countless hours every day watching Fox News

142. refused to allow his administration to comply with Congressional subpoenas

143. hired Rudy Giuliani as his lawyer

144. tried to punish Amazon because the Jeff Bezos-owned Washington Post wrote negative stories about him

145. acted as if the Attorney General of the United States was his personal attorney

146. attempted to get the federal government to defend him in a libel lawsuit from a women who accused him of sexual assault

147. held private meetings with Vladimir Putin without staff present

148. didn’t disclose his private meetings with Vladimir Putin so that the US had to find out via Russian media

149. stopped holding press briefings for months at a time

150. “ordered” US companies to leave China even though he has no such power

151. led a political party that couldn’t even be bothered to draft a policy platform

152. claimed preposterously that Article II of the Constitution gave him absolute powers

153. tried to pressure the U.K. to hold the British Open at his golf course

154. suggested that the government nuke hurricanes

155. suggested that wind turbines cause cancer

156. said that he had a special aptitude for science

157. fired the head of election cyber security after he said that the 2020 election was secure

158. blurted out classified information to Russian officials

159. tried to force the G7 to hold their meeting at his failing golf resort in Florida

160. fired the acting attorney general when she refused to go along with his unconstitutional Muslim travel ban

161. hired Stephen Miller

162. openly discussed national security issues in the dining room at Mar-a-Lago where everyone could hear them

163. interfered with plans to relocate the FBI because a new development there might compete with his hotel

164. abandoned Iraqi refugees who’d helped the U.S. during the war

165. tried to get Russia back into the G7

166. held a COVID super spreader event in the Rose Garden

167. seemed to believe that Frederick Douglass is still alive

168. lost 60 election fraud cases in court including before judges he had nominated

169. falsely claimed that factories were reopening when they weren’t

170. shamelessly exploited terror attacks in Europe to justify his anti-immigrant policies

171. still hasn’t come up with a healthcare plan

172. still hasn’t come up with an infrastructure plan despite repeated “Infrastructure Weeks”

173. forced Secret Service agents to drive him around Walter Reed while contagious with COVID

174. told the Proud Boys to “stand back and stand by”

175. fucked up the Census

176. withdrew the U.S. from the World Health Organization in the middle of a pandemic

177. did so few of his duties that his press staff were forced to state on his daily schedule “President Trump will work from early in the morning until late in the evening. He will make many calls and have many meetings”

178. allowed his staff to repeatedly violate the Hatch Act

179. seemed not to know that Abraham Lincoln was a Republican

180. stood before sacred CIA wall of heroes and bragged about his election win

181. constantly claimed he was treated worse than any president which presumably includes four that were assassinated and his predecessor whose legitimacy and birthplace were challenged by a racist reality TV show star named Donald Trump

182. claimed Andrew Jackson could’ve stopped the Civil War even though he died 16 years before it happened

183. said that any opinion poll showing him behind was fake

184. claimed that other countries laughed at us before he became president when several world leaders were literally laughing at him

185. claimed that the military was out of ammunition before he became President

186. created a commission to whitewash American history

187. retweeted anti-Islam videos from one of the most racist people in Britain

188. claimed ludicrously that the Pulse nightclub shooting wouldn’t have happened if someone there had a gun even though there was an armed security guard there

189. hired a senior staffer who cited the non-existent Bowling Green Massacre as a reason to ban Muslims

190. had a press secretary who claimed that Nazi Germany never used chemical weapons even though every sane human being knows they used gas to kill millions of Jews and others

191. bilked the Secret Service for higher than market rates when they had to stay at Trump properties

192. apparently sold pardons on his way out of the White House

193. stripped protective status from 59,000 Haitians

194. falsely claimed Biden wanted to defund the police

195. said that the head of the CDC didn’t know what he was talking about

196. tried to rescind protection from DREAMers

197. gave himself an A+ for his handling of the pandemic

198. tried to start a boycott of Goodyear tires due to an Internet hoax

199. said U.S. rates of COVID would be lower if you didn’t count blue states

200. deported U.S. veterans who served their country but were undocumented

201. claimed he did more for African Americans than any president since Lincoln

202. touted a “super-duper” secret “hydrosonic” missile which may or may not be a new “hypersonic” missile or may not exist at all

203. retweeted a gif calling Biden a pedophile

204. forced through security clearances for his family

205. suggested that police officers should rough up suspects

206. suggested that Biden was on performance-enhancing drugs

207. tried to stop transgender students from being able to use school bathrooms in line with their gender

208. suggested the US not accept COVID patients from a cruise ship because it would make US numbers look higher

209. nominated a climate change sceptic to chair the committee advising the White House on environmental policy

210. retweeted a video doctored to look like Biden had played a song called “Fuck tha Police” at a campaign event

211. hugged a disturbingly large number of U.S. flags

212. accused Democrats of “treason” for not applauding his State of the Union address

213. claimed that the FBI failed to capture the Parkland school shooter because they were “spending too much time” on Russia

214. mocked the testimony of Dr Christine Blasey Ford when she accused Brett Kavanaugh of sexual assault

215. obsessed over low-flow toilets

216. ordered the rerelease of more COVID vaccines when there weren’t any to release

217. called for the construction of a bizarre garden of heroes with statutes of famous dead Americans as well as at least one Canadian (Alex Trebek)

218. hijacked Washington’s July 4th celebrations to give a partisan speech

219. took advice from the MyPillow guy

220. claimed that migrants seeking a better life in the US were dangerous caravans of drug dealers and rapists

221. said nothing when Vladimir Putin poisoned a leading opposition figure

222. never seemed to heed the advice of his wife’s “Be Best” campaign

223. falsely claimed that mail-in voting is fraudulent

224. announced a precipitous withdrawal of troops from Syria which not only handed Russia and ISIS a win but also prompted his defense secretary to resign in protest

225. insulted the leader of Canada

226. insulted the leader of France

227. insulted the leader of Britain

228. insulted the leader of Germany

229. insulted the leader of Sweden (Sweden!!)

230. falsely claimed credit for getting NATO members to increase their share of dues

231. blew off two Asia summits even though they were held virtually

232. continued lying about spending lots of time at Ground Zero with 9/11 responders

233. said that the Japanese would sit back and watch their “Sony televisions” if the US were ever attacked

234. left a NATO summit early in a huff

235. stared directly into an eclipse even though everyone over the age of 5 knows not to do that

236. called himself a very stable genius despite significant evidence to the contrary

237. refused to commit to a peaceful transfer of power and keep his promise

238. and a whole bunch of other things I can’t remember at the moment."

Whew! I can't vouch for the veracity of all of the above, but just spot-checking, I think it's spot on. I now offer it to you FWIW.