How To Brush Up On Your Relationship-Building Skills During the Holidays

The holidays are almost here again. Chances are you'll be seeing family and friends in the next few weeks. And since it's not always calm and harmonious at the Thanksgiving table or any other family gathering, this is the perfect time to practice your relationship-building skills

?Since you're seriously searching for love, it's always a good time to practice and fine-tune your relationship-building skills. After all, the New Year is the busiest time for online dating, and you may just be in a new relationship sooner than you think!

But now we're talking about the holidays. So, you'll probably be going to parties and meeting new people. In other words, you'll have the opportunity to expand your social network through all the gatherings you attend. And you never know who you'll meet.

As you enjoy the holiday festivities, keep in mind these relationship-building skills:

1.???The skill of give and take.

You may not always get to do what you want when you want. You may have to forgo the football game on TV to spend time with your family or be social with friends. You're accommodating your host and those who are there with you when you make these decisions.

Other things you may have to give and take on are where you're spending the holidays and whom you have to hang out with - like those people who aren't your favorite.

Being able to give and take is a skill that you will need for any future relationship. In successful relationships, the partners accommodate each other when they can and when it doesn't hurt either's self-esteem or key personal goals.

Additionally, you may not always agree on everything. So being able to understand another's perspective is a great relationship skill. Simply repeating back what you've heard them say shows that you're trying to see their point of view. The key is you don't have to agree with them outright. And then you can share your perspective, "And this is the way I see it..." Be careful not to negate their point of view. Just ask them to consider yours as well. Of course, this requires others to be open-minded and willing to listen to other points of view too.

When you're part of a couple, it's very important that each person feels heard. This relationship-building skill will prove itself very helpful when you're not seeing eye to eye! So, it's never too early to begin honing this skill.

2.???The skill of being curious about others.

When you turn on your curiosity about someone you want to get to know, you build a connection with them. It shows you care and that you're interested in them. This is a great relationship-building skill to practice with other people.

So, the next time you're at a party and you don't know someone, or you don't know them that well, ask them where, what, when, and how questions. (Stay away from why questions because they tend to put people on the defensive.)

When you're curious about others and focus on them, they feel good about themselves. They'll walk away from the conversation with a positive opinion of you.

What if you tried this skill on a date?

Men, it's important you ask women about themselves and refrain from talking about yourself too much. In this way, you'll build rapport with her, and she'll start to feel more comfortable around you. And remember to be honest with your answers when it's your turn!

3.???The skill of making new friends.

After the pandemic, the one thing that people say they need to work on is their social skills because they've forgotten how to interact with others IRL.

As a single person, it's important to widen your social circle. We meet people through people. (Introductions are the second-best way my clients meet their life partners.) So, if you meet someone you like, offer to get together and do something. That's how you'll build rapport with them.

It's a well-known fact that people are impressed by others who are able to make friends easily. Having social ease is one of the values many of my clients admire in others.

It's not hard, you just have to get past yourself and be able to handle it if someone snubs you. And remember, snubbers either aren't nice, kind people, or they're very shy. In either case, it's not really a loss.

When you practice the relationship-building skill of making new friends, you'll see that meeting new potential dates and being comfortable on these dates will become easier with practice and time.

4.???The skill of making requests.

It's important to advocate for yourself and make requests. If you're visiting someone's house and you need accommodations, don't be afraid to ask for them.

If you're a vegetarian or you don't eat carbs, you have to ask for what you need. If you need a special chair for your back, then don't be shy and ask for what you need. Most hosts and hostesses are more than happy to comply.

And when you're meeting and dating people, make reasonable requests and allow others to honor what you desire, if it's within their realm. You can learn a lot about someone when you see how they respond to your requests.

As an example, I like to sit at certain tables in a restaurant, so I feel most comfortable. One of my dates was put out when I asked to be moved to another table. That was a sign for me that he wasn't the one for me. However, my husband has always been very accommodating and takes the table switch in stride!

5.???The skill of taking initiative.

A great dating motto to adopt is "Nothing ventured, nothing gained!" Today, if you want something, you need to go for it. People will appreciate your efforts.

During the holidays, you can take the initiative by inviting friends over or hosting a party. You can ask each of them to bring some of their friends of the opposite sex! Or you can collect toys or food for people who don't have enough for the holidays.

Even if you're a female, asking a man out may be the thing that gets the ball rolling with your relationship. And with anything, the more you do this, the easier it will get.

So think about what you can take more initiative with during the holidays. What would make this time of the year more joyful and fulfilling?

There you have it: 5 key relationship-building skills. If you practice them during the holidays with people who know and love you, you'll be able to use them with the new people you meet and on future dates.

How much easier would having these relationship-building skills make dating for you? I’d love to connect and help you move forward in your relationship goals. The first step is to visit www.TalkwithCoachAmy.com.