How to Break Old Habits

The fundamental challenge with creating sustainable change in our lives is that we approach the problem backwards.

We attempt to create new processes, like gym routines or memberships, that will lead us to the big outcomes we desire, in this case weight loss or strength.

The problem is that we are fighting an uphill battle against well developed neural networks in our brain that desires comfort.

Let’s examine this process in some depth to help create a new path forward.

Why is Repetition Compelling?

How many times have you tried to start journaling or exercising daily without any success?

You’re a capable and intelligent human and you know that the process you’ve set up hasn’t worked before, but you decide to try it again all awhile knowing that it is so illogical.

What exactly is going on there?

We repeat the same story because we know what the outcome will be. Predictability imitates as effectiveness. We become loyal to the central theme of our lives, and return to it because it’s safe and comfortable. Any departure from that, even temporary, causes uncertainty.

Being in new territory, developing a new story and belief to create it, creates anxiety. The easiest and fastest way to end this anxiety is to go back to the familiar: the old story.

The central challenge of creating new ways of being is our beliefs, our habits, and our stories. The invisible decisions that we make from our beliefs about what is possible, become our daily habits, our collection of repetitions.

A new story must be gradually constructed by a person who must, in the process, voluntarily give up what is known, secure, and predictable.

Your Brain vs. Change

These familiar experiences travel along well-established neuronal connections. A neural network contains the information of a habitual pattern based on experience. These reactions become automatic, so we don’t have to make a new decision in each situation and old habits or accustomed behaviors are like being on a daily commute.

Research has shown that about 90% of our day is comprised of these automatic behaviors.

To create change you must become aware of these patterns, examine them and then willing to step into uncharted territory, make mistakes, get feedback and course correct as you go.

Creating Your Future Self

Now that we’ve identified that creating change is much deeper than signing up for a gym membership or buying a new journal, where do you start?

You must begin by defining the person that you want to become. You must envision and work towards adopting a new identity.

Our identity encompasses the memories, experiences, relationships, and values that create our sense of self and who we are over time. Our current behaviors reflect your current identity?

Therefore, what you do is a mirror image of the type of person you believe you are either consciously or subconsciously. The power is within our control in each decision we make to choose to create a new habit that is inline with the type of person we wish to become. We must create new beliefs, stories, and an identity to match where we desire to go.

Where to Begin?

Taking action to become the person we desire to can be scary. It requires courage and action, before we can truly be confident. As Richard Rohr said:

"We do not think ourselves into new ways of living, we live ourselves into new ways of thinking." ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Take some time to sit and reflect on these 3 questions below to help you get to the root of creating the healthy change you desire to see in your life.

Reflection Question 1: How would you describe the person that you want to become??

Reflection Question 2: How does that person spend their time?

Reflection Question 3: What do they value most and how do they act on it?

Really take your time with this. It's a journey. There are mountains behind this mountain, but you will get stronger, wise and clearer on your destination with each step you take.