How being your authenticate self can change the world - for the better.

There is a buddhist proverb that reads "Your perception of me is a reflection of you, my reaction to you is awareness of me." The brilliance of this observation is it's happening simultaneously upon each interaction we have. To take this a step further, there is a working hypothesis (across more new age communities) that there are multiple versions of the self. Every interaction you have, or thought about you - produces a new version of you. Importantly, these views can often be diabolically opposed to one another; a kind of "parallel universe of the self." To give this hypothesis life let me provide an example. I don't "do" traffic well - I can literally feel the life force being sucked directly out of my body with every minute that passes. Tapping into my lighter side, I have always wanted an English Bull Dog (his name is Scooter and he is a devout Chicago Cubs fan). Let's put these two versions of self together. Those observing me in traffic, on my way to the Bull Dog Rescue Shelter to pick up Scooter, would denote that I am a blonde anti- christ in a mini cooper. Those at the shelter , where scooter is unfortunately housed, view me as the second coming of Christ - all in the span of five minutes. Which version is right? Take into account, this doesn't include my version of self. While I often like to believe I am pretty special - the fact is I am not and if this is true for me than it's true for just about every other human being inhabiting this planet.

So "what is self," with varying views of who you are, and the fluid nature of the self ever -changing and rarely constant - how do you remain true to you, and what is the value of this? I have always loved the saying "humanity has more uniting us than driving us apart," which I agree with however in saying this, we are all unique. We may be drastically unique or ever so slightly unique but like snow flakes no two people are alike. While that may read like an after school special - it's not. Many of us get lost in what we should be, or the expectations that are placed upon us. Most of which have been handed down by generations, creating unconscious biases that by definition are not founded in fact, reality, and are no longer relevant. So we adapt ourselves to align with outdated views prescribed to us, rather than the views & attributes innately within us. I am not going to further elaborate on why we do this, other than to say "fear" is often the culprit. It's important to recognize the powerful role fear can play in our lives, to the point of dictating life quality as well as what we give to the world and what are willing to receive from it. How does being true to you, make the world a better place? Before I provide my view on this, it's important to note that I am not a behavioral economist, a psychologist, sociologist, an anthropologist, or any other "ist" that may provide the professional credence to make (in part) the assertions I make below. With that noted, I have lived and I have observed, and in part that may be all the credibility needed. You may agree with these points and you may disagree - the point is not to adopt the view but to entertain the ideas and decide for yourself.

1. People true to themselves are happier; happier people engage with the world more & often in a compassionate manner.

The key word here is "engage." When you are happier, you tend to engage with your surroundings more. You are not engaged in self doubt, or lost in insecurity. Remember if the buddhist are right you are consistently projecting your internal view onto others. Irrespective of who is standing in front of you, or their actual intentions, you will only engage with your perceived version of them. The problem with this, is that is more telling about you, than it is about them. Which brings me to my next point and the unfortunate reality that our emotions are contagious. Anyone who has ever achieved, sustained, or read a self help book about happiness knows it requires resilience; the contagion factor is part of this. How does this align with you being your authentic self? For starters, it's about boundaries. If you have a strong sense of self, others projections are far less likely to impact your mood and general disposition. If your boundaries are not intact, you are more likely to take projections of you on board, and because they are not your projections ... well that's slippery slope we have all been down. Finally, It's difficult to be happy, when you are living in the shadows of an expectation of who you should be or what you should be doing rather than who you are or how you want to spend your time. This does not have to be a bold statement about who you are and what you stand for (though it can be), but when we are happy we engage with the world more, and through this engagement we give & often take from our surroundings positively. If I solely accept the perception that I am a "mini -cooper driving blonde anti-christ," I may never share the joy of watching a cubs game with scooter. While you may not believe that has the power to change the world, it certainly would change mine.

2. One person can change the world - but you need to know how you want to change it.

I used to struggle with this concept because not everyone wants to change the world, or change for the good, let's note "good" is highly subjective, and how much can one person truly do? I find people (to include myself) often assume that you need to be Steve Jobs or propel change at a similar magnitude to be impactful but that's just not true. While Jobs (& others) did change the world (Note Jobs was not without flaws) most changes in the world are incremental and at the community level. Simply put, we change the world through our actions, the adage "be the change you want to see in the world," is real. If you want to clean-up the oceans, picking up one piece of trash at a time is a good place to start. Firstly, you are being true to your desire to create a more hospitable environment, irrespective of others opinion. Secondly, you never know who is watching and who you have quietly influenced to do the same. Whether we realize it or not, we are connected and strongly influenced by the actions of others - whether we have a close personal relationship with them or not. If we continue to play "follow the leader" because it is "easier" to toe the line - further progress will be stymied. As it has been famously stated (though know one seems to be able to pin point who actually said it) "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting a different result every time," so if you see an opportunity for you to uniquely (or not so uniquely) insert yourself - take it, the world needs new views and new ways of doing things.

To conclude there is nothing earth shattering, new or profound about these points & yet they still need to be said. We live in interesting times and are at the precipice of varying tipping points whether it's climate change, inequality, and/or advancement of civil rights and liberties (to name a few). This can tip in a positive direction, or in a less positive direction. The world needs more people that are true to themselves and opt to live a life that leaves them fulfilled, happy and without judgement. I believe the more you strive to understand yourself, the better off the world will be.