How To Become Someone You Don't Recognize.

How To Become Someone You Don't Recognize.

It sure is possible not to recognize yourself.

The photo on the left is me blind drunk about to go to a rave party, having made a lot of money the month prior from a startup.

The photo on the right is me eight years later giving an inspiring speech at Etihad Stadium to an audience full of leaders and several people I admire.

Everybody tells me I’ve changed so much.

I think change is for the better.



Before the change:

The person I was on the left spent most of the weekend hanging around the cool kids. They all liked me for my nice BMW, DJ career and carefree attitude.

While I never took drugs, they did. They smoked a drug called ice every weekend.

It destroyed their lives. They became drug addicts. I could have become like them. Luckily I didn’t. I found meaning and changed instead.

It wasn’t easy, but I ended up never talking to any of those friends again.

One year after this photo was taken my startup dream came crashing down. 

I walked away from it all and realized that I had a severe mental illness. It was this battle with anxiety that caused me to be a drunk and act like an asshole in the first place. Instead of trying to solve the problem I attempted to cover it up.

Status, cars, money and drugs were what I used to avoid the problem.



After the change:

The person I was on the right (taken earlier this year) eats healthy, rarely drinks, reaches millions of people through regular blog posts, reads lots of books, is wise with money, leads a team of digital marketers for a 900 person listed company, and most of all — have overcome mental illness.

I spent every day since the photo on the left was taken trying to be a better person and figure out how I could help people in the process.

I didn’t come to this realization on my own.

I’m not that smart, unfortunately.

Through the process of reading what the most impactful people on the planet do, I saw a pattern. I’d have to be an idiot to miss it after reading so many books.

  1. You must learn to deal with fear
  2. You must have a meaning beyond your own existence
  3. You must be patient, focused and work on your goals every day

Once I discovered this pattern, I began writing about it every week. I posted articles on my friends Wordpress Blog. No one really paid attention. I didn’t care. I was paying the price of discovering a meaning for my life and that was enough of a reward. Little did I know it was going to change other peoples lives.

Fast forward to when the photo on the right was taken, and I was reaching millions of people every month as a blogger. I never could have thought that I’d write so much and help so many people.

Being vulnerable and seen as a leader in front of so many people, scared the crap out of me. I nearly didn’t get on stage at Etihad Stadium. Then, I remembered the pain of what it was like to be the person on the left. I didn’t want to be that scared person any longer.

The key difference between the person on the left and the person on the right was this:

  • The person on the right wasn’t selfish
  • The person on the right overcame mental illness through understanding the power of thoughts
  • The person on the right didn’t give up

I can’t even recognize the guy on the left anymore. He died many years ago.

It’s possible to become a completely different person. I’m living proof and I’m not special.

Find what is meaningful to you

-tackle whatever challenge you’ve been avoiding.

Then you’ll change.

<<<>>>

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net


Anu Garg

Building Coredge.io, Head of Strategy & Partnership

6 年

Totally agree !!! I have personally evolved over the years from being extremely selfish to little less selfish, from being arrogant to being sensitive towards people, to be able to accept mistakes, apologize when wrong and also went not wrong at times.... Most important is to recognize that change is required, many times we live in illusion that whatever we are doing is just right...

Gary Frey

??A MacGyver for CEOs who want to save money, make money, stay out of trouble, & have FUN??

6 年

Excellent post. Thanks for your authenticity & being willing to tell your story, Tim Denning. You inspire me.

David Rosenberg, MBA

Market Research Strategy Leader?Helping Companies Understand the Feasibility and Potential of Any Market Situation?Podcast Host?Trainer?Keynote Speaker?Author

6 年

Tim Denning?- I write this comment with true tears in my eyes sir.? You really hit something deep inside me.? I won't bore folks (you) with the details, but I had a simply horric childhood.? For years I struggles to "fit in" -- even though I have had amazing things in my life (wife of 29 years, 3 awesome sons, great friends, etc.), I have had some inner demons to overcome.? I have been working the past couple of years to "become" someone I don't recognize but have never been able to articulate exactly what that can mean....until now.? Until your post. Thank you and God bless.? I absolutely know now that I am on the correct path!

Sina Fak

CEO at Conversion Advocates | Building the WAEL ?? Community + Podcast

6 年

Powerful and vulnerable share Tim. Everyday’s an opportunity to grow, learn, improve. We just have to take responsibility of ourselves and our lives.

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