How to Avoid Mistakes When You Communicate with International Colleagues

We live in a more global society than ever; this morning, I did a Google+ Hangout with a group of Kenyan Young Professionals, and two days ago, I started my day with a call to colleagues at IE Business School in Madrid. But these cross-cultural conversations also give us more opportunities to misunderstand each other. “What it takes to be a global leader has changed completely over the last 15 years due to globalization,” says Erin Meyer, professor at the European business school INSEAD and author of The Culture Map: Breaking Through the Invisible Boundaries of Global Business.

In the recent past, she says, “most of us were working with clients and suppliers and employees from our own cultures, and today a large number of managers are working with individuals on a daily basis from around the world. But I saw that the discourse around how to work effectively hasn’t changed much.  We’re still stuck talking about management as if we were working in a mono-cultural world.” Indeed, when Meyer picked up a recent book about negotiation by an American author, the implicit assumption was that readers would be negotiating only with people from their own culture – a big mistake. Here are a few common places where communication breaks down, and ways you can keep the dialogue going.

What does silence mean?  “ In many Asian cultures, silence is an important part of the discussion, since it indicates good listening,” says Meyer.  “So if you ask a question, there may be a few beats of silence before the other responds.  Yet in cultures like the US, the UK, Brazil, or France, where we see silence as something negative that is to be avoided in a discussion, if I ask a question and you don’t leap in with a response I think something is wrong.  The result is that some people speak a lot more, trying to fill up all those ‘awkward’ pauses, while the other group is waiting for a moment to speak, which never comes.” If you’re dealing with someone from a culture that values silence, make sure to pause more often.

How do you disagree?  How vociferously you disagree is a common cultural difference.  “In French, or German, or Israeli cultures, disagreements may be expressed quite forcefully and people feel that strong debate with open disagreement is positive for the team and organization,” says Meyer. “If you are an American and your French colleague tells you ‘I entirely disagree,’ don’t take this as an insult or an attack but as an invitation for a lively, constructive discussion.” But in cultures like Brazil or Thailand, disagreement is voiced more gently, and a phrase like ‘I partly agree’ may actually indicate they hate your idea. Be careful to listen for the nuances.

How much do you focus on the relationship vs. the task? The American business culture is the most “task-oriented” in the world, says Meyer. That means it’s common business practice, at least among colleagues, to take shortcuts like avoiding honorifics in emails (“Dear Mr. So-and-So”) or, if you can convey an idea quickly, perhaps just putting all the information into the subject line (“Meeting location has been changed to Room 204”). In America, that indicates respect for busy people’s time – but it can feel alienating to others who are used to more niceties. Recalls Meyer, “I had a Russian woman in class recently who said, ‘My American colleagues send me these emails with no greeting. They jump right in to telling me what they want from me and then they sign their emails with their initials. When I get these emails I say to myself, ‘Don’t they care enough about me to write a simple greeting?  Don’t they care enough about me to even take the second necessary to write their name?’” Odds are, her American colleagues have no idea she’s perceiving their messages this way.

To avoid misunderstandings, Meyer suggests taking an attitude of curiosity toward the other person’s culture.   “We all love to talk about our own culture, so ask questions, show interest, seek to see it from their perspective,” she says. “And be humble.  No matter how much experience you have working internationally, there is always more to learn. 

And don’t forget that cultures can still vary widely, even if you speak the same language. “I have often found that there is as much misunderstanding culturally between an American and a British person as between an American and a Chinese person,” she says. “This happens because when you work with someone who speaks a different language (and eats different food, and looks different than you), there is a stronger expectation that cultural differences will impact your effectiveness, so people are on the alert.” If a Chinese colleague does something unexpected, we’ll often attribute it to a cultural difference, but if it’s a Brit, we’re more likely to “forget” the cultural difference and blame them for being inefficient [or whatever the metric in question is].

“When we speak the same language and look more or less the same, we need to be doubly aware that cultural differences may lurk in unexpected places,” says Meyer.  “Then we can be flexible and open to different cultural approaches to getting the job done.”

This post originally appeared on Forbes.com.

Dorie Clark is a marketing strategist who teaches at Duke University’s Fuqua School of Business. She is the author of Reinventing You and Stand Out, and you can receive her free Stand Out Self-Assessment Workbook.