HOW TO APPROACH THE NEW YEAR IN A WAY THAT WORKS

Look, here's the thing – around 90% of New Year's resolutions fail within the first several weeks. That's wild, right? And I really believe one of the main reasons is that we're approaching goals through a lens that is not aligned with who and how we are. We're setting them from a place of shame or comparison, committing to things we think we "should" do rather than what we truly want.

I want to introduce you to a different way of thinking about this whole thing. My friend Mitch Whiting and his "Anti-goal mindset" have influenced me greatly around this. It's something I've been using for the past few years that's completely shifted how I approach personal growth:

"Big vision in bright colors, goals in pencil, plans in pen."

Start with What You Really Want

First, I want you to recognize something powerful – you don't have to set any specific goals. Maybe just sit with that for a minute. There's nothing you have to do or should be doing. Instead, ask yourself: What do I really want? Not what someone else thinks you should want, not what would look good on Instagram, but what do YOU actually want?

A Vision in Bright Colors

Create a vision board, but let it be big and colorful and even a little vague. Put up pictures that represent time with your family, or health, or whatever matters to YOU. Let it be expansive enough for you to grow into. Choose images that spark joy and motivation when you look at them, serving as daily reminders of who you are and what you want to create.

Goals in Pencil

Here's something that might shift your thinking: Write your goals in pencil. Why? Because who you are six months from now isn't going to be the same person you are today. Sometimes goals that seemed huge become limiting. Sometimes what we thought we wanted shifts as we grow.

And check this out – that's not just okay, it's actually powerful. When you write your goals in pencil, you're giving yourself permission to adjust, to grow, to aim higher, or to pivot entirely. You're not locked in. You're not a failure if things change. You're becoming. You're climbing!

Making Your Plans in Pen

Now, while your goals stay flexible, your plans – the actual actions you're going to take – those go down in pen. These are the commitments you make to yourself about how you're going to show up every day. Because here's the truth: it's not about hitting some specific target, it's about who you become in the process.

Think about it like this: If your vision involves being healthy, your plans might include:

• When you'll work out
• How you'll prepare your meals
• What time you'll go to bed

These aren't about hitting specific numbers – they're about becoming the kind of person who lives a healthy life. The numbers are the guide, not the destination.

Giving Yourself Space and Freedom

There's something really powerful about holding both – having a direction you're headed AND being detached enough from the outcome that you can give yourself grace when things don't go exactly as planned.

Remember: The object of the goal isn't actually to reach the goal. I know that might sound crazy...sit with it for a minute. The real purpose is to become the type of person who can achieve any goal by showing up consistently, regardless of the results.

How to Put This Into Practice

1. Take some time to create your vision board. Let it be big and colorful and maybe even a little scary. This is about possibility, not limitation.
2. Set some initial goals, and do it in pencil. Let them guide you, not define you. Be willing to adjust them as you grow.
3. Write your plans in pen – these are your commitments to yourself about how you'll show up every day. (Make sure they are things you WANT to do, not that you SHOULD do)
4. Give yourself space and grace. The joy isn't in the destination – it's in the climbing.

A Final Thought

Fall in love with the process. Fall in love with the climb. That's where all the joy is – the destination never actually matters. This is SELF LEADERSHIP. When you approach your growth this way, you create space for something really powerful to happen: authentic, sustainable growth and becoming that comes from a place of freedom rather than control.