How am I overcoming my fear of biking with OKR?

?? Biking is an easy task for many, but it's filled with fear and apprehension for me. What is it like to grow up outside of the norm?

My cousin and I used to joke that our families skipped teaching us how to ride a bike. For decades, I regretted not being able to ride a bike. And for the past five years, I have been curious and wanted to learn. I imagine freedom, independence, and satisfaction.

But I felt helpless and disconnected when my friends attended bike rallies or biked to work. When I told people I didn't know how to ride a bike, many would ask: Didn't you learn that as a kid, as a rite of passage? I told myself (and them), half-joking, that my family had skipped the biking part. But people didn't really know how to react. Nor did I…

I felt stuck. Over the years, the stuckness grew into a much bigger fear. The inner voice, the critic, victimized me. "Elliot, you will hurt yourself badly if you ride a bike now."

Deep down, I knew it was insecurity, and my negative self-talk created a lot of stories!?

• Story one: I don't know how to ride a bike because my dad passed away when I was five! I'm the victim!
• Story two: I don't know how to ride a bike because my mom spends time shopping on weekends! My mom and cousins like to shop 4-8 hours a day on the weekend. But I continue to victimize myself and blame others.?

As Donald Miller said, “The more you identify as the victim, the worse your story will go,” and he also said, “Villains and heroes actually have the exact same backstory… the difference between the villain and the hero is one thing: how they respond to pain.”?

Why am I feeling stuck like a Roomba stuck in a corner? Because I practice catastrophic thinking. I told myself I would buy an extended warranty for my phone, but when I'm biking, I only have a helmet and my life insurance. And because of that, whenever I'm close to a car, I would be hit by a car and hurt myself so badly. So I keep going down the rabbit hole. I was paralyzed and didn't go out on a Saturday!

Tips on changing the story! It started with me.?

1. I tell my friends and colleagues I'm interested in bike riding.
2. My colleagues suggested using an Objective Key Result (OKR) approach to help with my biking. I establish what my Objective (O) is:

• To stay healthier and have more self-love as I establish my Objectives for the second half of 2023.?

What are the key results, the enablers against the objective??

• KR1) To safely bike to the Old General Store weekly by the end of July. (I drive there weekly to donate food to their community fridge).
• KR2) To safely bike from the GO station by the end of summer. (I currently drive to work. I wanted to take the train to cut down the commute time).
• KR3) To safely bike to the office by November.

This framework unlocks my anxiety. My perfectionist wants me to be biking to the office next week! And I did not give any leeway for failure. It was the all-or-nothing approach. However, the OKRs divided the plan into smaller achievable and actionable tasks; my mind becomes less anxious and at ease.

Recently, I talked to my neighbour who trains a professional cycling group. He gave me a lesson and gave me a 101 for biking. Then, my neighbour Tom gave me his bike, so I had no more excuses NOT to practice it.?

What have I learned in this process?

• It's a mindset shift: I told people I was scared, but I told myself I would try to bike (versus I told myself I would never bike).
• Reframe mistakes as learning. Every time I fall, I take a deep breath and pick myself back up. (faster and more tangible growth, rather than just studying and learning from videos).?
• I meditate and visualize how I would bike from the train station to the office.?

These three tips helped me overcome my fear and transform into a new inner leader—empathic, self-aware, and growing.

Books I'm reading:

• The Greatness Mindset: Unlock the Power of Your Mind and Live Your Best Life Today?by Lewis Howes

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Who's?Elliot Ng? I am a customer experience leader and Certified Professional Co-Active Coach focusing on uplifting leaders of colour to live their full potential.?

My professional background helps me decipher between signals and potential when others see noise and chaos — whether in disorganized operations or poorly functioning teams. I also Let'sice customer-centricity to grow customers & base revenue. Let's connect!