How Allies Can Make a World of Difference for Autistic People at Work

Around 80% of autistic adults who want to work are unemployed. There are many reasons for this, but a big issue is that even when we successfully negotiate bizarre (to us) neurotypical recruitment processes, we may struggle to thrive in our role or even to hold on to our jobs at all. This often has nothing to do with our ability to do the job and everything to do with being neurodivergent in a neurotypical world. The problem is not necessarily outright discrimination, though this certainly does happen, but perhaps more often, we struggle to fit in and understand what is expected of us.

This is where allies can play a pivotal role. The precise nature of allyship is as varied as the individuals concerned, and the most important step in being an ally to an autistic person in the workplace is to talk to them about how you can support them and what they need. There are, however, some common areas that arise very often and can be a good starting point for your discussions.

Speaking the Unspoken

Every aspect of our world is full of unwritten rules: form a queue while waiting for something, let people off the bus before you get on, never serve Brussels sprouts to people you like, and so on. However, the workplace probably has more unwritten rules than anywhere else. I have lost count of the number of times I have finally uncovered some key piece of information and wondered just how I was supposed to know this when nobody told me, and it was not written down anywhere!

When you are autistic, you really do feel like a stranger in a strange land much of the time, including at work. The “everybody just knows” belief is strong in most workplaces. People do not all know, and autistic people are?especially so. We do not pick up on subtle, nonverbal cues?and?are often flabbergasted by social conventions that neurotypical people appear to be born knowing.

For example, what does “in a few minutes” mean? Two, twenty, or three hours? The answer probably also varies by context and may change over time. I struggle to deal with that level of uncertainty, so please give me a time and either stick to it or at least let me know a new time if you cannot make it.

Allies can play a huge role in navigating these confusing waters. They can help with interpreting less-than-clear instructions and messages, tell us when no means yes and yes means maybe, and make sure that we understand all the things that nobody talks about but assumes we all know. Even things as mundane as how people get hot drinks on a team can be a minefield – do we take turns making drinks for the group, or do we all take care of ourselves? I have often ended up not having a drink at all for the first few weeks in a new job until I can figure it out!

Helping Us Play to Our Strengths

The narrative of autism in the workplace is very often focused on the challenges and support needs. This makes perfect sense, as that is where help is needed. But it does mean that the many strengths of autistic people are often overlooked when they could be a huge asset in their jobs and to their employers.

The problem is that we often need to gain the skills or the confidence to push ourselves forward to do something, even when we know we would be good at it. Whether we are pushing for a promotion or just stepping in to help, we may not know how to do so without stepping on anyone else’s toes, causing offence, or even recognising when the opportunity arises.

For example, I know I am good at finding creative solutions to problems. However, I find verbal communication and meetings extremely difficult and limit how many calls I join daily to avoid total exhaustion. This means I often do not find out about problems I might be able to help until much later, sometimes too late to assist. So, I have told my manager, who is a fantastic ally, that I can help with problem-solving more widely, but I need to be told what the issue is in a way that works for me.

Good allies will help autistic employees to realise their full potential and to thrive at work. We must avoid the misguided approach of expecting people to always focus on improving what they struggle with rather than making the?best use of their strengths. You would not tell the greatest sprinter in the world to stop training and enhance their IT skills, so why do we constantly do just that in the workplace?

Targeting the Message

Many autistic people have a very strong sense of justice and fairness, while sadly, many workplaces are full of inequality and injustice. This mismatch can cause us many problems! I have been in trouble at work many times for challenging and questioning things that made no sense to me at all,?and I?even came close to losing my job for doing so at one point.

When I see injustice, I naturally tend to confront it head-on. In the crazy world of the workplace, this is often the worst possible course of action, even if you are firmly in the right. There are egos to consider, unwritten rules to follow (again), and toes to avoid treading on. I have frequently been told that what I am trying to achieve is perfectly fine, but the way that I am going about it is both offensive and unlikely to get the desired result.

While I find this incredibly frustrating, there is an element of having to play by the existing rules to get those rules changed to something more sensible and just. Again, this is where allies come in. They can help us navigate the intricate corridors of power, speak to the right people in the right way, and get the results that we seek. It really should not be this way, but you have to start from where we are, not where we should be.

The Strength of Allyship

The workplace can be a very lonely place when you are different, such as being autistic. Allies can be life-changing in making you feel valued as you are, no longer alone, and helping you thrive and overcome obstacles?you may not have even known were there. We all like to think that we are totally self-sufficient, but you would see no shame in using an interpreter to speak to someone whose language you do not know. If you are autistic in the workplace, that is precisely the situation that you are probably in. There is nothing to lose and everything to gain from seeking and accepting help.